In a relationship, but noticing other girls/women

[OhHeyThere]

Hey guys,
So I have been going steady with my girlfriend for a little over a year and a half. This surpasses my second longest by 8 months, so this is certainly the most serious relationship I've ever had. I wont go into details but we definitely click, and things are good. She's my Disney movie princess with a Taylor Swift-kinda vibe (and looks ) The occasional arguments do happen, but I feel like we're all the better for it.

But recently, I've found myself checking out other girls, but more specifically just this one. I have never talked to her, as every time I possibly could, she has headphones in. All I know is what she looks like. I know nothing about her, but for some reason I find myself fantasizing about hanging out with her.

I have read this is a normal thing, merely wanting what I don't have, and to throw away a year and a half of commitment to my gf for a complete stranger is definitely not a good thing. I know it's a normal thing for someone to look at others while in a long term relationship, but this my first really long one myself.

I was wondering, those of you who have been in a really long relationship (or 2...or 5), how do you curb these random crushes that pop up? Or do you even have them in the first place?

 

[Slomo]

So says every man that got caught by his wife as he looks at a woman walking by.

There is a difference between being married or in a serious relationship, and being blind. As long as you don't act on those wayward stares you're part of the normal group.

 

[deerest]

It's normal. Women look too.


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

 

[dogboy]

It's a matter of understanding random crushes for what they are. Some people have to learn that the hard way... by experience. Others of us realize early on that we can look at and admire something without owning it, maintaining it, and living with it 24/7.

Swimming pools, boats, and exotic cars are much the same thing. Its much better to have a friend that lets you enjoy them once in a while than it is to own it and have to put up with the cost and hassle of maintaining them. I admire the aesthetic beauty and technical elegance of my friend's vintage Porsche. At the same time, I know my cheap genes would never let me enjoy owning one. I'm fortunate that he comes around and let's me drive it once in a while.

Gad. I do this all the time and I've found out if I don't buy the expensive thing that I really want, it continues to be mysterious, wonderful, incredible and the thing I desperately want that hasn't disappointed me yet. Once purchased and a year later, it's just another thing. There have been a few, and very few, exceptions to this, my recent piano purchase being one of them. I still love it and play it every day, but it's not a person.

The thing is, you don't even know what this girl's personality is like. I'm going to quote God again. Yes, Judge Judy. I've seen these drop dead beautiful young women on her show. Once they start speaking and the case unravels, you realize what horrible people they are. Typically, some poor idiot guy has given the young thing all of his money and she's raided his checking account.

So if you love your girlfriend and the two of you really hit it off, be thankful and realize that the grass is greener on your side of the fence.

 

[Tetra]

No matter what's on the menu, we still look at the specials. Lots of truth in that saying!

Sent from my SM-T810 using Tapatalk