Telling your therapist

[BobaFettish]

I talked all around it, but ultimately it came to a point where opening up about this side of me was almost a necessity and was the missing piece.

 

[geka]

Ooooh... this was nearly a decade ago, but I'll answer as I remember it.

First session, I told her about my kink, and what I wished to achieve. I was nervous as hell, and when I began bashing myself for being... (I don't remember the details, but I wasn't exactly nice to myself), she immediately shut me down. No self-shaming for being different!

She spent a long time asking questions about my kink, very much in detail. Then she began the actual hypnosis. First time I've been in trance, and I'm SO glad that I was actually able to do it. As far as I know, some people are not able to be hypnotized.

I had a few sessions of that kind. Two or three, I think, as one is rarely enough. She also gave me a sentence that I was to repeat to myself a number of times while going to sleep.

The effect didn't come immediately, but she did the "groundwork", so to speak. Soon I could pee while leaning further and further back, and finally I could do it while laying flat on the bed. It didn't come naturally, but I could do it. Strangely, I often couldn't do it if I was thinking about it, but if I distracted myself with other thoughts, it suddenly worked.

Over the years, it became gradually easier, and now I can wet my diaper in bed without much thought. I often wake up "half way" because I need to pee, do it without moving, and go right back to sleep.

For years, I used her services for various things involving the mind – not only kink related stuff. She is definitely one of the most open-minded people that I've ever known.

Thanks I’ve been able to go lying down on Occasion but mostly I’ll wake up and stand up start to go then stop lay back down in bed and finish laying down and go back to sleep. It works for me but the Hypnosis sounds interesting maybe I’ll give it a try sometime

 

[UnderTheRadar]

I have been considering this myself

 

[Bigbabybret]

Ok, i'm not in therapy, but know plenty of people that are and have been, also been through plenty of psyc evals for work/jobs over the years being a security contractor it was rather common.

That said, I question hiding anything from a therapist, even if you think it's not anything you have an issue with.

You are going to them as a medical professional and confidental as well, laws very by your location.

But, you should be open with everything no matter how small you might think the issue is about that thing, let alone if you want to hide it, that in itself says you should be discussing it with them as a course.

Like if you goto you GP and dont tell them as example your constipated, that may seem a small issue, but it may be something that causes them to look at it and figure there is another problem and/or be a part of a bigger problem, worst might be that they sense your hiding it and cause them to go down the wrong road on an issue or diagnosis.

If your going to a therapist you should be 100% open to them about anything in your life small or big.

I can easily see a therapist sensing you hiding something and getting a sense that it may be a different or larger issue than ABDL or alike. They easily will be distrated on this area your hiding causing them to not focus on the real problem as well.

In all reality, by hiding something from them can only cause you to NOT get the help and support you need, either in distracting them by the hiding this, or them getting misdirected about this area and going down a false path.

I know that therapists as a whole are used to talking to people hiding things and usually the things they hide are causing issues and they will dig to discover them at some point. By being open about things, you can get this area in the mix and in all reality it's not going to be a major part or therapy, especialy if that is truly not the issue, and will only get to the root cause of issues sooner not having this area being hidden from them.

I myself have talked people through some really horrid issues over the years, and hidden things distract from the real issue at hand.
As example, helping a worker through some vile things they saw on a job, but thier hiding issues in a relationship (a smaller issue too) did distract from the help to get through the guilt they felt over not being able to help in the issue at hand, but the lying about the SO/relationship being fine distracted me and thier therapist over the real issue they needed help with and in reality caused a good extra week or two of being sidetracked, yes still an issue, delayed the bigest thing they were going through.

Now, please just be honest to your doctors, wether that is telling your GP you did some coke or your therapist you like to act less than your age, or you dont always take your meds on time or whatever, it will only help you in the end, and wether or not they "like" the answer isnt in thier job description, it however may effect this effectiviness of thier services easily. You dr is there to help you, not to be a friend, also not able to tell others (within reason)

 

[LittleTyke]

Thanks I’ve been able to go lying down on Occasion but mostly I’ll wake up and stand up start to go then stop lay back down in bed and finish laying down and go back to sleep. It works for me but the Hypnosis sounds interesting maybe I’ll give it a try sometime

It might work for you, and it might not. The most difficult part may be finding a hypnotist willing to participate. The first one I contacted did absolutely not want anything to do with the "project".

 

[BenTennyson]

I have too, but it never was a topic afterwards, it feels like my T is ignoring it for now. But I know for sure she will put it back on the table at some point; or I might. As I have recently figured out that my little desires are deeply rooted in childhood trauma, and that kind of coping strategy, maladaptive or not, is pretty telling.

We have to use this putting the cart before the horse approach, working from the symptom/coping strategy back to the origin, as I have next to no coherent recollection of my past. Only a bunch of fragmented memories.

The fact that I am using diapers recreationally also made it into my case file at some point, which I don't like.

 

[littleFeathers]

Another question that causes me to do some thinkin'....

The biggest reason, by far, that I've been seeing a therapist is the isolation and loneliness since the pandemic suddenly had me working from home 99.998% of the time, and claimed my Dad, "my" cat (if a cat can ever "belong" to anyone) died... I haven't told about my AB/DL interests, because it just doesn't seem relevant: the reasons I'm on my own don't include being AB/DL, at least at this point. Arguably being AB/DL is a help with the main problem, as that gets me into a place like this where I can at least share some thoughts (Thanks for reading this!) and have some sense of community.

And, I don't think that AB/DL is a huge percentage of who/what I am. Probably my furry/feathery-ness is a much bigger contributor to my personality and values, and my therapist knows about that for sure. Kind of hard to hide it sometimes...

So, my suggestion if you're struggling with telling, is to think carefully about why you're seeing a therapist, what problem you're trying to solve, what aspects of yourself are relevant, and how comfortable you are with sharing those aspects.

 

[tnydinobbysmolbean]

I have not regretted telling my therapist, it felt liberating saying it outloud to a health professional

 

[Dragonkindred]

My problem is I originally started wearing nappies due to a disability and while medication has gotten Mt continence concerns under control I have learnt to enjoy the feeling of wearing nappies.

My disability though is declining especially my energy levels and it's impacting my life and wellbeing so my therapist is pushing me to find a social group or activity but after work I am so fatigued I can barely stand most days.

Nappies are great as it's fun by myself for minimal energy and it reduces the effort I need to spend finding a toilet but I would like it to be more social but I'm so scared of telling my therapist about ABDL stuff or anything sexual for that matter.

I know there's obviously non ABDL social activities but once again my fatigue often leaves me without the energy to get involved in anything so it's a catch 22 between fear and energy to do anything independently.

To make things worse most people who know me personally and professionally know enough about my disability to know I don't need nappies so if they found out I wore them it would be a difficult conversation.

 

[LittleLuke]

Similar situation. Happy to talk about it anytime

Thanks for reaching out to me. I would like to talk about life with you. But I'm not a Est. contributor so I can't message you. I'm not very good at technology. My smart phone is smarter then me. LOL So if you can reach out to me that would be nice. I live on east coast of US near Phil. I'm not sure what time zone you live in. I'll be back on after 8:00 tonight logging off now

 

[BabyAshtonMarie81]

My therapist knows that I purposely choose to wear and use diapers 24/7. We talked about it and they said as long as it doesn't interfere with my daily life activities or become a hindering obsession then it's a healthy thing. But if it becomes hindering and an interference to my daily activities in my life. Then it's a non healthy thing and would need to be stopped or controlled. I been 24/7 for 10yrs now

My choice to be 24/7 in diapers for their intended purposes, comes down to the facts that I do have an over active bladder, and I do have ibs issues. So its more convenient to just go wherever my body needs too. After yrs of not using a potty. I don't even realize most of the time that I've wet myself, I do notice that I'm messing myself but I just continue on doing whatever I'm doing. I pooped a few times during my therapist sessions and she just says whelp someone is going to need a changing before they leave today.
It's up to you. You don't have to tell your therapist everything it's your choice to make.

 

[Stephie1049]

I have recently started going to therapy. Not sure if I should tell my therapist about my abdl self. Has anyone told their therapist and how did they react ?

Most therapists have already heard it all. Fascination with diapers generally falls under the category of paraphilia, of which there are many. I suggest that you might want to read Nancy Friday's excellent book "Men In Love," which delves into the many interesting things that men tend to erotically fixate on. While diapers (or panties) are somewhat non-normative, they are hardly unusual, especially for mental health professionals. Alice Miller also wrote a number of books with might prove helpful in coming to grips with your non-normative interests, such as "The Drama of the Gifted Child." I also found Arthur Janov's book "The Primal Scream" to be helpful.

I have shared my interest in diapers and panties with several therapists over the years. None were at all shocked. The general consensus has been that so long as my paraphilia didn't interfere with living a normal life, it wasn't harmful. But like anything, when something becomes all-consuming to the point where it interferes with being able to maintain one's normal lifestyle (which includes earning your living and being financially responsible), then it is harmful.

Read "Men In Love." Then open up to your therapist. Good Luck!

 

[RaawrrrPincess]

Yes, after I felt comfortable.

 

[KarmaBaby3]

No energy to read all comments but I told mine therapist second appointment … because we were going over my history (I had it as homework) and got asked if I thought I had got over my dads suicide from when I was 4 years old …. This was my 5th therapist/counsellor etc and she was at my functional medicine doctors office where I felt safe and respected (unlikely basically everywhere else). I also was doing an online appointment and knew if I didn’t say something now I probably wouldn’t (i never told another person - my mom was only one who knew). So I said yes … but no …. Because when I was 4 after he died I pretended I was a baby for a bit until my mom told me that wouldn’t bring him back and I still wear diapers and want to regress so maybe that was related ……

We didn’t touch more on it for another few months, then very very slowly because I literally couldn’t say the words out loud …. Now over a year and half later I can talk a lot more freely about it with her and had a few uncomfortable conservations with my mom (not there totally but enough I’m good with it for now).

 

[LittleLuke]

So here is my update on telling my therapist. I asked her last week if she had ever heard of ABDL lifestyle. She said no so I told her it was short for adult babies diaper lovers. She asked if it applies to me I said yes but I ask her to do some research on it and we will talk next week. So this week we talked about me and my baby side. She was very understanding and I felt comfortable talking about my baby side. I told her how I wish I could come out as a baby to people and go out in the world wearing a diaper, plastic pants my pink baby top. She said I should do it so this morning I put on 3 pull-up diapers, my thick cloth diaper and plastic pants I put on a pair of shorts and you could see the bulk from my diaper I put on a long t-shirt to kind of cover my diaper a little. I was planning to accidentally show my diaper to someone today, but I chicken out. I went to 6 different stores and bought some things. One was a new plush teddy. I was out about 4 hours and I was holding my pee. I got to the last store and could not hold it any longer. So I let a little bit out wile I was getting a soda. I walked to the checkout line there was 2 people in front of me and standing there I let lose, I peed for a long time I could feel my diaper filling with pee, it was great. I felt like a real baby wetting his diaper. I'm glad my plastic pants are tight around my legs, no leaks. I can't wait to tell my therapist about my day. Thanks for all your responses to my post.

 

[LittleTyke]

So here is my update on telling my therapist. I asked her last week if she had ever heard of ABDL lifestyle. She said no so I told her it was short for adult babies diaper lovers. She asked if it applies to me I said yes but I ask her to do some research on it and we will talk next week. So this week we talked about me and my baby side. She was very understanding and I felt comfortable talking about my baby side. I told her how I wish I could come out as a baby to people and go out in the world wearing a diaper, plastic pants my pink baby top. She said I should do it so this morning I put on 3 pull-up diapers, my thick cloth diaper and plastic pants I put on a pair of shorts and you could see the bulk from my diaper I put on a long t-shirt to kind of cover my diaper a little. I was planning to accidentally show my diaper to someone today, but I chicken out. I went to 6 different stores and bought some things. One was a new plush teddy. I was out about 4 hours and I was holding my pee. I got to the last store and could not hold it any longer. So I let a little bit out wile I was getting a soda. I walked to the checkout line there was 2 people in front of me and standing there I let lose, I peed for a long time I could feel my diaper filling with pee, it was great. I felt like a real baby wetting his diaper. I'm glad my plastic pants are tight around my legs, no leaks. I can't wait to tell my therapist about my day. Thanks for all your responses to my post.

Thank you for the update. It is great to read that your therapist is understanding.
Please be careful about "accidentally showing" on purpose. While I believe that the general tolerance of kinks is improving, it could be counter-productive to throw your fetish in people's faces.

 

[LittleLuke]

Thank you for the update. It is great to read that your therapist is understanding.
Please be careful about "accidentally showing" on purpose. While I believe that the general tolerance of kinks is improving, it could be counter-productive to throw your fetish in people's faces.

thank you for your reply. And your right about not subjecting people to my fetish. I went to a adult book store that's were I was going to have my accident. The people there have their own kinks.

 

[LilJenJen]

My therapist knows about me being Little, it was one of the first big topics, she didn't know much but was curious about potential applications for little space... I explained my views, and provided research materials... It was honestly refreshing to have my little side seen as part of the solution rather than the problem. Of course the topic of little space comes up quite often as a result, sometimes in really interesting context... For example: Why would I want to experience things like being put in time out or having to help clean a mess I made? Because it's an age appropriate form of discipline, not the violence that made me fear all adults around me for years... So yeah knowing the real me helps my therapist to provide help for my actual problems and understand myself better... The kinks talk is more suitable for the sexuality forum, but yeah I had that conversation too...

 

[LittleTyke]

not the violence that made me fear all adults around me for years...

Wow...

Lots of hugs from DK.