The (American) foot ball baby

[Paxaman0]

Baby Stevie’s Punishment Time!!
It was a rough morning when I woke up. The previous night, I had been training for the final game of the season. Our team, the Banishing Banshees had made it to the finals, and for the last game of the year, we were playing the Ashton Angels. I went to George Washington Creek Middle School and I was in the 8th grade. Every little sixth grader (or pixie as we call them) waits for his moment to get into the 8th grade. Once you’re in the 8th grade that means you get to rough up all the pixies and little kids. So that meant that I got to beat up all the little 6th graders and trashcan them. Every Monday, my buddies and I would pick up a little sixth grader and give him a swirlie.

“Hey, Stevie don’t miss the bus! Please honeybun, don’t be late again!” Moaned my mother in her typical banter of the morning. She and my dad were leaving to go on a trip and was a little more nervous then usual, which was definitely a bad thing. It was Friday, and that meant that the weekend was sure to be coming up soon.

Last Friday, I had missed the bus and I had to bike to school. When my mom found out about it, she about wrung my neck.

“Sure thing mom, and I’ve asked you to stop calling me Stevie!” I moaned as I protested her childish adjectives and nicknames for me. After all, I was almost 13 and she was treating me like a 2 year old! “Sure thing baby.” She said in response, completely ignoring my wishes as she kissed my head and shoved me out the door. It looked to be a fine day, as I looked outside and the sun was blaring. I hadn’t remembered to check the thermometer but from my estimation, it was about 45 degrees outside.

I walked to my nearby bus stop and waited for the bus to come up for my ride. In the meantime, I pulled out my I-phone 8g and started playing one of the fun mini-games that let you torture little natives on an island, by dropping objects on them, or bring the shark out of the water.

After about the usual 10 minutes or so of waiting *it seemed like a minute or 2 because that’s how fast free time flies* the bus arrived and I got on. Sitting in the front row were my 2 good girl friends Shatanya and Muriana. They both had Indian heritages that traced way back but Muriana had a beautfiul light brown skin color and Shatanya had a darker colored skin. Just one glance at them could tell you that Shatanya had inherited more of the Indian genes from her family. Muriana had deep brown eyes that looked comparable to the color of a strong, oak tree. Shatanya's eyes were black like an onyx gem stone. Muriana had a tiny nose that looked like a cherry on top of a cake and Shatanya's nose was elegant like the Mona Lisas. They both had beautiful, black, flowing hair like the starry night sky.

“Hey guys, mind if I squeeze in beside you?” I asked as I decided to give them a surprise for the day. Often, I could hear them argue over who gets to sit next to me for the ride over and back.

“Sure!! Sit next to me Steve!!” Squealed Shatanya as she flung her backpack onto the ground and tried to shove over Muriana to make room. To simplify matters, I squeezed in beside both of them and winked at Muriana.

“Hey guys, did I tell you about the party at my house on Friday?” I asked at them as their mouths opened in surprise. That was probably the best part about these bus rides. They gave me a chance to shock both of them with fun stuff that was going on. “Yeah, you’re both invited! Here, let me grab your invitations…..”

I mumbled as I reached into my backpack and grabbed the invitations that I had made. My parents were going to be out of town for the weekend and they had allowed me to have the party and told me it was fine as long as nothing crazy was going on. “Here you are!” I said as I grabbed both of them and handed them to the girls.

Then I recognized that some of the guys around me were looking at me and shaking their heads in disgust. Marcus *an tall, handsome, African-American* always seemed to dislike me. I could never figure out why, because I hadn’t done anything to him! But I didn’t let it trouble me as I got off the bus and gave both of the girls a hug. I was too excited and revved up for tonight’s game against the Angels. Our football team had been training for weeks and the best part about the day was that after the game, Muriana and Shatanya’s parents got to drive me home to our house for the party. My parents had given me my own house key just in case the babysitter lost hers.

School droned on and on as the professors talked about the usual boring math, and science, and history. I really didn’t pay too much attention because of the big game tonight. If we won this, we’d be the biggest champions ever; no one had ever taken the cup home 3X in a row in our state! The pressure was on me too, I was one of the key wide receivers.

It was 3:30pm and me and my buddy Ron headed out to the field to warm up with the rest of the team. The only part of football that I didn’t like was that Marcus was on the team. He was a great player, but he always had this edge against me, and usually gave me the cold shoulder. “Hey Ron, chuck me a couple wide balls won’t you?” I asked after I had put on my pads and gear.

“Sure thing Steve, just don’t get hit square in the nose like last time! THAT was hilarious!” He laughed as he started backing up and got to about 30-40 yards where he threw the football. Ron was a great throw with his muscular shoulders, and strong legs; he made the ball tougher for me to catch to improve my receiving skills. After about 50 throws or so we got tired and just lay there and started talking about everything from girls, to grades, to the summer. Of course our coach came over, yelled at us and told us to get back to work, and under pain of death, we obeyed.

Time flew rapidly by during practice and before we knew it, it was 5:30pm and time for the game to begin. The Ashton Angels had arrived and they had some freakishly big players. Some of them were even taller than a few sophomores that I had seen! The coin was going to be tossed and since they were visiting our home stadium, they called it. They called heads and it was tails so we got to receive the ball first. Our punt return man, Tony was great at his job and got us to the 40 yard line. After our qb tossed the ball to our guys we managed to score a touchdown.

The game flew by and before anyone could imagine it, the score was 21-21. Our team attempted to run the ball, for the next few yards. We were close and this was our first drive of the play. So they did a left toss to Ron, one of our running backs and he managed to get about 4 yards. Then we decided to go for a throw. We were going to have 2 players go across and the rest slant to the middle. It worked!! We got 7 yards this time!! On the 3rd drive, we took a time-out to discuss the play. There was 30 seconds left in the 4th quarter and we were all sweating like crazy, and it had gotten hot outside. So we talked strategy for a quick moment, and we decided on the easy but quick play known as the slant. I waited and waited for the deadly words......then all of a sudden.... HIKE!! The qb shouted loudly and he dropped back into the pocket. I dashed from the back and got in front as quickly as I could. Only 1 defender was on top of me, but he was so big that he was blocking my entire scope range. I decided to continue to move forward instead of go backwards, and the defender didn't realize it until it was too late! I caught the ball at the 30 yard line and was tackled at the 15 yard line. All we had to do from here was just drive and drive the ball. After 3 plays we had 2 yards left so we were going to smash the ball in. The ball was hiked and passed to me and I dived forward!! I couldn't see, but did I make it???

Yes!! TOUCHDOWN!!! We made the point after the try and the entire crowd burst into cheers. My 2 girlfriends were crying their eyes out, and I could here their parents saying "Wow, I have never seen a middleschool game of football this intense!!"

I took off my pads, and sat down completely exhausted. The rest of the team was wiped too, and our coach was so astounded he just sat down on the bench. After a 25 second break, we high-fived the other team. It was a great time and an even greater game. Shatanya and Muriana hugged me and I loved every moment of it. Then as promised, their parents drove me home and then the fun began. The babysitter was so absorbed into her new Iphone that she didn’t care what happened. I went into our huge basement and took out 3 12 packs of coke and grabbed all the kinds of chips that my parents had brought earlier on for us. Within half an hour, the rest of our friends arrived including Tony, Ron, and Andrew. Ron was the only one on the football team with me, but Tony and Andrew ran track, and Andrew also did wrestling.

Ron was a personal bestfriend of mine and had been for many years. He was always there to help me out in a tight spot, and we even kind of looked alike. The only difference was that his hair was dirty-blonde and he had greenishblue eyes. Tony was tall and had long black hair that fell past his eyes and was as long as the school rules would allow. My mom disapproved of it, because she was always old-fashioned but I just laughed and ignored her. Andrew....was just a little wierd. He had ADHD and was always laughing about something or other. On top of that, he had red hair and bright blue eyes with freckles all over his face and arms.

We headed up to my room to play Guitar Hero 3 on my Xbox 360. We experimented with Dragonforces song Through the fire and flames. Like everyone else, we failed on the introduction, but we had a fun time doing it. Then we proceeded to play Super Smash Bros. Brawl on my Wii. After hours of food, games, all my good friends had left. I hated being alone in the home it just gave me this eerie feeling.....

It had been a great weekend and I had forgotten all the stuff that I had done to the poor 6th graders. I really would regret it later....sure enough I heard the car pull in and my mom stormed in with a look of fury on her face. I didn't understand it at first and I could not figure out why she was so angry!

Suddenly, my mom walked over, grab my pants and pulled them down! “Mom what, wha--OWWW!” I screamed as she ended my questioning with 2 intense swats to the bum. She then gave me 8 more pain-racking swats as I screamed and bawled my eyes out. “That’s what you get for being mean to little sixth graders! Did you not think that we wouldn’t find out about this? Did you forget that the school has our telephone number?!! They told us about all the cruel things you've done to younger, nice kids!” Then she spanked me another 5 times and said “I am so angry at you right now!!”

At this point I had remembered everything that I had done to the poor sixth, and seventh graders, and I cried even harder as my dad came in. His face was set in anger and his look of suppressed rage was even scarier than my mom’s bellowing outrage. “Your mom and I decided on the way home on what your punishment should be for your bullying! We got the call late on Friday night from the principle himself about what a problem you have been to younger kids. So we decided that since you are acting completely like a foolish, pathetic baby, then you will be treated one. Take off your underwear entirely and your shirt.”

I was too scared to disobey and I took them both off and stood their completely naked. “Now, see what you look like now Stevie? Well get used to it, because we’re going to be seeing it a lot more than you.” I was confused by this statement and embarrassed but I didn’t respond. Sometimes the best response was no response.

Then my dad responded again with another order. “Take all your underwear from your drawer Stevie, and put them on until you cannot put on any more.” I reacted as quickly as possible and ran upstairs to my room, and grabbed all 20 pairs of underwear. I got up to about 17, and my stomach started hurting. I complained to my dad and he said “If you don’t put on more, I will put them on for you and you won’t like that.” So I put on the rest and looked at myself in my mirror.

“Now Stevie, oh I forgot to mention. Your new name is Stevie. Steve is a name for mature, responsible, young men. You are neither of those so you will now be called Baby Stevie. Baby Stevie, come with me and watch what Jill and I are going to order for you on Ebay with your allowance. (Jill is the name of my mom.)

I started crying again, because I had over $400 dollars saved up in allowance for the next Nintendo system that was going to come out. I had saved and saved and now my dad was going to spend it?

We arrived at the computer desk and my dad grabbed the mouse and went for Google. He put in the words “Footed Onesie” and after looking for about 20 minutes he found a site for adult babies, teen babies, and incontinent people. I gasped as I saw what he was going to order for me to wear. It was a big pajama suit that covered your entire body, like what babies wear! “Hmm, I need to measure your waist Baby Stevie, hold on one moment.” I just stood their in disbelief as he grabbed the tape measurer from the garage and wrapped it around my waist. “You’re about 24 inches around, so this one looks good for you!” He said as he clicked on the onesie and gave it first class mailing. He proceeded to do the same, by ordering a pack of thick Bambino diapers, several packs of wipes, a pacifier, a crib, and a high chair. “Your mother and I decided that this was going to be your punishment for all your years until senior year. We’re going to home school you so that you can wear diapers 24-7. And by the way, you’re allowance will be used to pay for all the items. Even with your $400 dollars, that only paid for the diapers, pacifier, wipes, and onesie. You still need to pay for the crib, and high chair that you’ll be eating out of. All these items should be arriving within the week because they are first-class. Consider us lucky Stevie! That website was having a great sale! Oh, and if you have to use the restroom, you are forbidden from using the toilet, and if I catch you using it I will punish you severely. Use your underwear for now, and we wash it out until your items arrive! Well, the rest of the day is yours buddy.”

This was only the beginning of the hell that my life was going to be.

[Laram]

Originally Posted by Paxaman0

I was planning on having sex with Muriana today at my house; I figured that I could probably coax her into it.

At 13?! Hell, I Dont Plan On Having Sex Till I'm 19+ Lol.

Also, More, I Need Stuff To Read.

[satyrical]

You've clearly put a lot of time and effort into this story, and I know it has potential to be good, but at this point I find it to be unoriginal, unimaginative and unbelievable. Unoriginal because we've all seen the boy-punished-by-parents story dozens of times, and this one seems to add nothing new to the mix. Unimaginative because you've given us no idea of who this character is- no background, no description, no motivation, nothing like that. And the story is unbelievable because what little character development you have given just makes me shake my head. He's 13 and sex-crazed? He scores the game-winning touchdown on the final day of school (after a day of classes? On the final day of school?)?

I feel like I've read this story many times before, and so I want to see something new and different. At this point, your story doesn't offer it.

[Paxaman0]

Originally Posted by satyrical

You've clearly put a lot of time and effort into this story, and I know it has potential to be good, but at this point I find it to be unoriginal, unimaginative and unbelievable. Unoriginal because we've all seen the boy-punished-by-parents story dozens of times, and this one seems to add nothing new to the mix. Unimaginative because you've given us no idea of who this character is- no background, no description, no motivation, nothing like that. And the story is unbelievable because what little character development you have given just makes me shake my head. He's 13 and sex-crazed? He scores the game-winning touchdown on the final day of school (after a day of classes? On the final day of school?)?

I feel like I've read this story many times before, and so I want to see something new and different. At this point, your story doesn't offer it.

It's going to come later trust me but for now this story is going to be unoriginal. I'm going to edit it later. Oh, and I edited the parts that seemed too artificial I'm going to see if I can come up with a good character description for the main players.

[iNinja]

Originally Posted by Paxaman0

It's going to come later trust me but for now this story is going to be unoriginal. I'm going to edit it later. Oh, and I edited the parts that seemed too artificial I'm going to see if I can come up with a good character description for the main players.

Edited the parts that seemed too artifical? I don't know about anyone else but that seemed like pretty much the whole story. I could see potential in this but you need to slow way down. You introduced about nine characters in about five paragraphs and then told us nothing about them with the exception of one or two discriptions.

All I have to say is take more time with it and extend the sor so you can describe things better and not make the reader go through one day so fast. Well I look forward to seeing an improved next chapter.

[Paxaman0]

Originally Posted by iNinja

Edited the parts that seemed too artifical? I don't know about anyone else but that seemed like pretty much the whole story. I could see potential in this but you need to slow way down. You introduced about nine characters in about five paragraphs and then told us nothing about them with the exception of one or two discriptions.

All I have to say is take more time with it and extend the sor so you can describe things better and not make the reader go through one day so fast. Well I look forward to seeing an improved next chapter.

Edited, and revised again. The minor characters don't have as good of a background or character description but what do you think now?

[Boogeyman]

Originally Posted by Laram5

At 13?! Hell, I Dont Plan On Having Sex Till I'm 19+ Lol.

Also, More, I Need Stuff To Read.

Did you remove your prostate? Why the hell would you wait that long?

[babysage]

Originally Posted by Ellipsis

Did you remove your prostate? Why the hell would you wait that long?

Because he wants to? Its a personal decision. No offense, but why are you in such a hurry?

[Paxaman0]

Not to sound like a moderator or anything, but can we please get back on topic? I want to know if my story is good enough for me to post the 2nd half.

[satyrical]

Originally Posted by Paxaman0

Not to sound like a moderator or anything, but can we please get back on topic? I want to know if my story is good enough for me to post the 2nd half.

Of course. Only in the rarest of cases is a story deemed unacceptable after one chapter. I want to see if you will turn this into an original, creative work.