sorry

[babykalie]

Ok so i delete a story but i don't no howto delete the post untill then . HI everyody

[Takashi]

Boring.

[Dr_J]

I've noticed a few things. Your spelling is atrocious. That may sound like I'm being too blunt, but a lot of people who post their stories up here when they've never written/posted anything else tend to not check their spelling.

With that said, your credibility will plummet. I can't take stories seriously when spelling is an issue, mostly because my brain is set to mentally fix all mistakes and point them out when I'm reading. I honestly cannot focus on the brunt of the story because of this issue.

The other thing I noticed was your dialogue. A lot of it is...pointless. Check this out:

Character A: "What's up?"

Character B: "Not much. You?"

Character A: "Not much here either."

It's boring and just fills in empty space. If you use dialogue, you should try to make it engaging, especially since dialogue is a HUGE part in character development. The example I just gave you makes characters seem like they're made of cardboard; flat and unattractive. Bring them to live with what they say to each other.

And finally...punctuation. I can't even explain how much it irks me when there are no periods, question marks, ellipsis, and the like. Again, this takes away from your credibility.

I don't want you to take this as, "Hey! Dr_J is attacking my writing ability! " Think of these as pointers from a semi-experienced writer. And don't give up writing if more people critique your work and you don't like what they say.

Also, one question to ask yourself is, "Why am I writing this?" Is it something you want people to read? Are you writing in hopes of getting popular? Do you want to get a message across to as many readers as possible? Answer these, as they should help you decide whether or not to continue writing. They aren't meant to discourage you in any way, but rather to help you hone in on what your goals as a writer are.

Hope this helps, and welcome to the forum!

--Dr_J