Page 1 of 2 12 LastLast
Results 1 to 10 of 18

Thread: My wife surprised me last night!

  1. #1

    Default My wife surprised me last night!

    I've shared on this site before about how my wife flipped out about my diapers when I told her about it last October. Although the she accepted it at first, she flipped flipped a few times before deciding that I either had to give them up or she was taking the kids and leaving. Not wanting to lose my family, the obvious choice was to stop wearing diapers. As any ABDL can tell you, that's way easier said than done. Since then, she has occasionally asked me if I still get the urge to wear and I answer honestly and say yes. But then that's usually the end of the conversation. Then yesterday, out of the blue, she tells me that she is over the disgust and hurt and said that she is okay with me wearing them in my private time....just never around her. Obviously this is a huge step in the right direction for me, but I didn't want to get too excited so I told her that it would be great, but I wanted her to be absolutely sure that she was okay with it and wouldn't flip out of she aciddentally stumbled across my stash. I told her to sleep on it. The subject hasn't been brought up since last night and I'm scared to even ask her because I'm afraid she may have flip flopped again. So here I am, cautiously optimistic, waiting for her to bring it up again. Should I just come out and ask her again or should I wait it out a few days?

    Sorry for the long post, but I am excited.

  2. #2

    Default

    I guess since you're married, you would understand this more than I do. But it seems to me, in order to have a good working relationship, openness and communication are key. I might be pulling this out of my butt, but it's worked for me for almost a year (my longest lasting relationship! Aaaahhh!)
    So, imo, don't let things fester in your mind. Say what you are thinking, as bottling up what you want would only make it worse. See, in my relationship, since we aren't legally bound or have kids, if she said anything like your wife did back then, I don't think we would have lasted long, as a relationship is about give and take, not just giving in all the time to demands. I would have made my stance clear that she doesn't have to be a part of it, and I would do what I want (especially something so intrinsically harmless). If it were that big of a deal, how would we be able to live together for the rest of our lives with something so important to me festering in my head like that? My desires would exponentially increase until I couldn't handle it anymore. Maybe diapers aren't as important in your life, I would hope your wife and kids are more important at least :p. But it still has some impact on your psyche that you haven't been able to partake for the last 6 months?
    So, just tell her what's on your mind, man. Tell her the fact that you don't have to live a life of suppression and anxiety so long as you can do the things that make you feel good. Tell her how great it is that your relationship can take this step, as some can't. Like what everyone here says, take it slowly, one step at a time. You shouldn't expect much from someone who doesn't understand, but guiding her to realize the truths for herself are key. Or you know... Something like that :p
    I know, long response...but I have had things come up in my relationship like that, and I think we were able to work through it amicably.

  3. #3

    Default

    Good luck. I hope it works out this time. Only you can know when it is best to talk to her again. I really hope she doesn't change her mind again.

    All the best

  4. #4

    Default



    Quote Originally Posted by PaddedInPuyallup View Post
    I've shared on this site before about how my wife flipped out about my diapers when I told her about it last October. Although the she accepted it at first, she flipped flipped a few times before deciding that I either had to give them up or she was taking the kids and leaving. Not wanting to lose my family, the obvious choice was to stop wearing diapers. As any ABDL can tell you, that's way easier said than done. Since then, she has occasionally asked me if I still get the urge to wear and I answer honestly and say yes. But then that's usually the end of the conversation. Then yesterday, out of the blue, she tells me that she is over the disgust and hurt and said that she is okay with me wearing them in my private time....just never around her. Obviously this is a huge step in the right direction for me, but I didn't want to get too excited so I told her that it would be great, but I wanted her to be absolutely sure that she was okay with it and wouldn't flip out of she aciddentally stumbled across my stash. I told her to sleep on it. The subject hasn't been brought up since last night and I'm scared to even ask her because I'm afraid she may have flip flopped again. So here I am, cautiously optimistic, waiting for her to bring it up again. Should I just come out and ask her again or should I wait it out a few days?

    Sorry for the long post, but I am excited.

    I don't mean to be a prick, but....I would divorce her.

    If your marriage is funded on shallow trust, it won't last.

    My GF knows, she is currently diapered now. I trust her and she trusts me.

    My 2 cents

  5. #5

    Default

    I think you should wait a little to bring it up again. Though it is true that a spouse should be supportive, it's easier said than done. Maybe she's just thinking about it and giving her time to decide might make her feel better about her decision. Hurdles are meant to be worked through, and it's hard for both parties. Though both parties should also learn to compromise and think about what is best for the other. Give her time, and after a couple days if you feel the time is right, bring it up again. Don't force an answer out of her, just ask if she's thought about it and decided yet, if she hasn't I wouldn't press it too much as that could only make things worse.

  6. #6

    Default



    Quote Originally Posted by CYBERWOLF View Post
    I don't mean to be a prick, but....I would divorce her.

    If your marriage is funded on shallow trust, it won't last.

    My GF knows, she is currently diapered now. I trust her and she trusts me.

    My 2 cents
    Disagree. I don't think he's at all saying that it's founded on shallow trust, but rather that he confided in his wife and it really bothered her. I'm about 90% I've already advised on this one in the past, and my advice remains the same. Wait, take it slowly, let her come to terms with things, but be clear about your own feelings and don't lie. She'll eventually get there.

  7. #7

    Default

    I think you should occasionally remind her how thankful you are to have an understanding wife that is "willing to put up with you". Acceptance is a two way street, they show acceptance and you show gratefulness. Don't press it though, she's shown she's willing to take the next step when she's ready. She may grow over time, or this may be as far as it ever gets.

  8. #8

    Default



    Quote Originally Posted by bambinod View Post
    I think you should occasionally remind her how thankful you are to have an understanding wife that is "willing to put up with you".
    Life is short. Do you really want to spend it with someone who just puts up with you?

  9. #9

    Default

    Hey friend,

    I do find some of the comments advising the OP to "divorce her" & that "life's too short" to be a little near sighted and ignorant. To those giving that advice, either you aren't married with children or you've been blessed with the extreme lucky situation of having a willful participant in your desires and fantasies.

    First of all, there is a marriage and children involved. It isn't easy to just walk away from that, no matter what the circumstances are. I totally back the "life is too short to not be yourself" mentality, but the OP seems to be deep down a different path. Being a Husband and a Father is not the same role as a boyfriend, whom can rightfully and easily end a relationship with a girlfriend over poor understanding of a fetish and lifestyle. And even if the OP were reckless enough to get up and leave or let his wife take his kids, how is this explained to not only his children, but the families and friends involved? Being a parent requires a percentage of selflessness, as does being a husband. That is what you signed up for.

    I will say this, to any single person reading, please please please.. If marriage is on the table, be honest with your significant other up front about your secrets beforehand. They have the right to know who they are marrying, as do you. Although being an AB/DL is harmless, it is usually very hard to understand for those who aren't. The OP here obviously was honest after the fact, and i'm sure in that moment his wife felt trapped. She no longer had the easy decision of whether or not she is able to share this life or try to understand this life, as she already had children and a marriage with this man. Each choice for her can seem scary and extreme in the moment. From this update, it seems like she is trying, which is obviously very positive.

    For me, I told my fiancÚ nearly five years ago. initially, she had a horrible reaction. But she's stuck with me and tried to understand, although it's been a journey up incredible highs and gloomy lows. But, when I asked her to marry me, she said yes knowing what she was getting herself into. She had the choice before things were set in stone, knowing who I was and what I really want. She was able to experience it and process it beforehand.

    For the OP, I would advise that you take it very slow. With a constant level of humility, explain that you are a husband and a father first, but this is a little part of you that while harmless, will never go away. She would be making you the happiest man in the world if she at least tried to understand, given the boundaries that you've already worked out. But the biggest thing to work on is her understanding of the fetish - She obviously has bad one, and a good one can change both of your entire lives.

    Any way, good luck friend. We are here for you. Keep us updated!

    Cloud

  10. #10

    Default



    Quote Originally Posted by CYBERWOLF View Post
    I would divorce her.


    Quote Originally Posted by ultrapampers View Post
    Life is short.

    Bad advice... There's much more involved (love, finances, home, jobs, sex, kids, family, etc...) than these people know. You don't divorce just because you have things to work out. You fix it!

    Now that the proverbial ice has been broken, give it a day, or two, then discuss it. Marriage is a two way street, so make sure there's plenty of give to makeup for the liberties you take. Keep it totally away from the kids, or there could be a meltdown. Lock things up (a file cabinet works, and isn't too conspicuous), and make sure she has a key, and access to all the sites you visit, that are diaper related. She may never want to visit the sites, or look in the file cabinet, but at least she isn't excluded from doing so. That goes a long way in working on rebuilding the trust.

Similar Threads

  1. i diapered my wife last night!
    By ChrisKrinkle in forum Diaper Talk
    Replies: 9
    Last Post: 29-Jan-2015, 21:55
  2. I'm a little surprised...
    By KuuKuu in forum Diaper Talk
    Replies: 17
    Last Post: 29-Feb-2012, 05:05
  3. surprised to see such a community!
    By bambinod in forum Greetings / Introductions
    Replies: 20
    Last Post: 20-Jul-2010, 15:28
  4. Told my wife last night...
    By dentedwheel in forum Adult Babies & Littles
    Replies: 28
    Last Post: 09-Mar-2010, 06:39

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •  
ADISC.org - the Adult Baby / Diaper Lover / Incontinence Support Community.
ADISC.org is designed to be viewed in Firefox, with a resolution of at least 1280 x 1024.