Been a good long while since I last posted here. My apologies.
I come to you all seeking to solicit information from all you caretakers out there. Ever since tapping the babyfur side of my being this time last year, and breaking into the AB world, I've wondered what it would be like to be a caretaker. I know finding the right cub or little would be key to easing into the role. Finding one that would overlook little mistakes and such, and who would provide an authentic feel back.
Now I was afforded the opportunity to be a caretaker this weekend, and for once I seized that opportunity. I surprised even myself at taking this role, and doing it pretty decently for my first go around. Changes, cooking for my guest, gaming, watching movies and funny videos, bottle feedings, snuggles and even napping together.
Looking back though, something didn't feel right. It felt off, unnatural, strange, foreign, and in opposition to what I felt that such a role would produce. Perhaps at heart I was never meant to be a caretaker, but I'm okay with that. When I ask myself if I want to do that again, the answer is "no", but only because I didn't extract anything from doing it. So, I reached out to a friend who is a caretaker to pose the question that I will now also pose to the caretakers in this community:
What do you get from being a caretaker?
If the idea that actions are driven by purpose, then what purpose does a caretaker seek? Is it the love you feel watching your little be happy? Is it that you feel good taking care of someone? Or is it something more?
I ask this question because I feel lost...am I giving up on this too quickly? Or is this how most caretakers feel from the start? I'm not upset about it - and I'm certainly not suggesting I didn't have a good time, but I more like at the very most I would only ever play the role of a "part-time" big brother. I feel far more comfortable just having someone to hang out with.
I also feel like the caretaker-little connection is a strong bond, built on an emotional need that both sides seek out. Is this a correct assumption? If so, maybe this is impacting my ability to find enjoyment in it?
At any rate, thanks for reading, and I look forward to reading the responses here!