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Thread: My conclusion for abdl (today)

  1. #1

    Default My conclusion for abdl (today)

    I think its unhealthy.
    Its become an obsession for me.
    Sexually i only seek abdl type things.

    Maybe its unhealthy for me. I read plenty of positive things on here for other people.

    Sexually i want to be a baby. Everything about it turns me on.
    Being cradled, sucking a dummy, breastfeeding, being carried to bed.
    I wish i didnt have these feelings, and like mentioned on other threads would absolutely get rid of it if i could.

    For me, its a fantasy i should keep it a fantasy.
    Its taken over my life, what decisions i make etc..

    Like most i struggle with the stress of adult life, but i think indulging in abdl makes this worse.
    It has stopped me from sexually exploring in my 20s which effects me now.

    Im not sure what the answer is for me to do but if there was an off switch i would have flipped it a long time ago.

    Anyway, just thought i would share my current feelings

    X

  2. #2

    Default



    Quote Originally Posted by Ababyboy View Post
    I think its unhealthy.
    Its become an obsession for me.
    Sexually i only seek abdl type things.
    This is a big red flag.

    I would think that seeking counselling for the OCD would be a good start.



    Maybe its unhealthy for me. I read plenty of positive things on here for other people.

    Sexually i want to be a baby. Everything about it turns me on.
    Being cradled, sucking a dummy, breastfeeding, being carried to bed.
    I wish i didnt have these feelings, and like mentioned on other threads would absolutely get rid of it if i could.
    Again this is the very things that should be discussed with a councilor.



    For me, its a fantasy i should keep it a fantasy.
    Its taken over my life, what decisions i make etc..
    Again this is the things that go along with the counselling.
    As for the taking over ones life. this is the first part of the binge and purge cycle that I personally had to address. The major change I made was gaining an understanding of the feelings and setting the boundaries to help gain control.



    Like most i struggle with the stress of adult life, but i think indulging in abdl makes this worse.
    It has stopped me from sexually exploring in my 20s which effects me now.

    Im not sure what the answer is for me to do but if there was an off switch i would have flipped it a long time ago.

    Anyway, just thought i would share my current feelings

    X
    Yes I do understand about the life style and the effect on RL situations.

    I probably sound like a broken record, but I talk from personal experience.

    First I went to counselling and got the help to deal with the depression and other issues I had.
    Then I thought I had beat the binge and purge cycles, but they came back even worse after 8 years.
    When I came to this group I got help to gain an understanding of the Paraphilic Infantilism and from there I was able to set boundaries, gain control over the feelings and such, and in the long run gain self-respect and understanding. That is why one can see a lot of threads here about how it is not "unhealthy", but it becomes a stress relieving coping mechanism.

    I hope this help you get started on a path to understanding and control.

    Egor

  3. #3

    Default

    I agree with Egor. One thing we talk about on this site is having balance in one's life. It's important to have an outside life, something that is aside from diaper wearing. Having social relationships with others is healthy. In fact, medical science says being with others actually prolongs our lifespans. For the same reason, it's healthy to have a significant other. When we don't have these things because we're fixated on something socially alien like diapers, that would suggest some serious psychological problems, the kind that need professional help.

    If you can't break away from letting diapers control you rather than the other way around, I would look for a counselor, a medical professional who could help you get this into a more healthy perspective.

  4. #4

    Default

    I can't agree with the "go see a counselor" thing at the moment. Thing is, he will present as "I have a problem with this, I don't want this in my life", and, as most therapists lack a basic understanding of what it really is to be an ABDL, from a clinical standpoint, they will both venture down a road that will be expensive and fruitless, in terms of clinical results. The patient will be counseled on how to avoid triggers, deal with their feelings productively, and, basically just "abstain" in order to practively head-off any negative feelings associated with wanting to wear diapers. It can go two ways, depending on how OP presents to a clinician: "I like to wear diapers, and x, y, and z, are associated things that turn me on, sexually, and I don't know how to feel OK with that" will lead you down a very different clinical path than, "I hate this about me and I want to stop." I suggest you face facts: These feelings are pretty permanent and they will not go away. You are currently unhappy with these feelings, and you need to change that. In an attempt to do so, you need to find someone (doesn't even have to be a mental health professional!) who can help bolster your confidence in learning to explore and accept YOU for YOU. Be prepared to shop providers - not everyone is comfortable discussing this kind of thing, and not everyone is experienced enough to ask the right questions and help you learn to accept yourself. If the treatment plan consists of "let's help you not have these feelings", I'd suggest you keep looking.

    OP, things you need to ask yourself, since you seem to feel like you're "obsessed":

    Do you currently, or have you in the past 90 days:

    Skipped meals to wear diapers?
    Haven't gone to work, in order to wear diapers?
    Haven't bathed/showered/taken care of other personal hygeine, so that you might wear diapers?
    Broken the law, or acted immorally because diapers?

    These are all things a clinician will ask you, and, my guess is you'll probably say No to at least one, which means you are most likely. . . . OK!

    You said it "controls what decisions you make", or, is otherwise heavily influencing your decision-making - Can you give us a concrete example of what happened when, because you like diapers, you made a choice that has negatively affected your long-term health and welfare?

    I think the crux of this issue is your shame and guilt associated with your fairly recent discovery that this is really the only thing that turns you on and will allow you sexual gratification. This can be scary at first - many of us here know that, firsthand! It's certainly not comfortable, especially when you start comparing yourself to your peers. That said, I think you need to start focusing on finding healthy ways to integrate these feelings into your life, so that you can learn to be OK with being you.

  5. #5

    Default

    Well, I'd have switched it off to if I could have, but that's not really here nor there, is it? Since we can't. (Or someone is holding out, I don't care). But look, part of enjoying things is not letting become the things that govern you. I like to drink, and I'm willing to put in the work to make sure I don't let it become harmful. I like to wear diapers, and I have to meter it very carefully to balance my spouses needs.

    I realize that I just said "I" alot my response, but just take a break, focus on a different hobby, if it's sexual, try a different kink, don't let one thing govern your life.

  6. #6

    Default

    I'm sure we'd all have switched this off, if we could. The battle/journey, here, is learning to accept that you are different, and that maybe it's for the best.

    And trust me, no one, not even Tucker Max, explores, sexually, as much as they'd like to in their twenties.

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