Since I was about 9 I've had an interest in our favorite happy pants. This interest eventually grew into a fetish and finally crescendoed into me sitting down and actually ordering for the first time in my life. While part of me is glad that I finally just got it over with, I guess I subconsciously dreaded the day when it would finally happen
It's strange because I really have nothing to worry about realistically. My girlfriend and I are in a very healthy loving relationship, in which she has vocalized interest in participating in ABDL/Babyfur activities with me. Beyond that, my folks and I have a very strong understanding of privacy, and will not check my mail or burst in on me while changing myself for the first time!
I made the decision that I had made myself wait long enough and would do this for myself, if for no other reason. I splurged on a bag of ABU Space with Babyfresh scent specifically because I want to be able to fall in love with diapers from the very first moment, and they were recommended the most from my friends! I briefly chatted with ABU on Twitter, voicing how nervous I was towards ordering, and they did a wonderful job of talking it out with me. I've never really been spoken to in a "little" sense, where the other person treated me like I was actually young in a very loving way, not demeaning!
I guess out of everything, I think I'm just nervous because I'm still not over the shame of being in diapers? It's one of those things that just hard wired into us, to look at an adult wearing diapers and say "look at that freak!"
I really REALLY want to get into it, and I know I will as soon as I get myself all taped up, but do you all have any advice?
Thanks for reading my massive text-wall of a post! You're all beautiful