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Thread: Reactions from spouses?

  1. #1

    Default Reactions from spouses?

    Some of you may remember my thread about me telling my wife a few months back. She first accepted my diaper wearing, then flipped, then accepted then flipped out again. This was over a two week period and after the dust settled, she basically gave me the ultimatum of the diapers or her and the kids. Obviously, I chose my family over the diapers and have been diaper free since October (except for one recent slip up that she obviously doesn't know about). I miss my diapers so much.

    Anyways, I just wanted to know your guys experience with telling spouses or boyfriend/girlfriends. I want to hear good and bad.

  2. #2


    Too much to txt. I'm sorry. You're giving up a piece of you that you can't change that I don't agree with but understand your decision.

  3. #3


    It seems like way too small of a thing to threaten to bug out with the kids over. That would worry me that other minor problems come up later and get a similar reaction. Marriage used to carry a heavy dose of "accept your partner for who they are", a concept that seems to have fallen out of favor with the divorce rate what it is today. Best of luck to you though!

  4. #4


    I agree that the reaction was pretty extreme and she had since said that she wouldn't leave me, but it's something she just can't get behind so she would rather me stop all together. She has asked me a few times since the fall out of I still have the urge to wear and I tell her the truth. I also tell her that the urges will most likely never leave and she needs to understand that.

  5. #5


    Been there, done that. I had a similar experience in life. My wife passed away 2 years ago so you know the choice I made. Decide what is important to you.

  6. #6


    My wife was very accepting. She had discovered a diaper order I had made and wondered why we were getting diapers. That's what brought me to this site and the members urged me to be honest with her, which I was. I was very complete in my explanation, including some of my past, what infantalism is, why I thought I was attracted to wearing diapers and that it was something that I felt since the age of 4. She asked me if I had enough supplies. Since then she has bought me all sorts of things.

    Our situation is probably different from most in that I've saved my wife's life many times when she has gone very low blood sugar. In addition to that, I'm her dialysis partner as she does home dialysis. However, that merely demonstrates that good marriages are about give and take and supporting one another. It's a shame that your wife is unable to understand that the desire to wear diapers is a psychological condition and that by denying yourself, you may be doing emotional harm to yourself.

  7. #7


    I was so scared to tell my husband about my Abdl side. He actually never caught me, but I finally just sat down and talked to him about it. He was so understanding and I felt the weight lift off my shoulders. I'm very lucky to be with someone that accepts me for who I am, all of me, not only a part.

    My wish is that everyone could be accepting. I'm so sorry you had to give up somethings that was a part of you.

  8. #8


    I worry about this every living second, I don't have a girlfriend but I do worry about being accepted in the future and having a girlfriend leave me over it. In my complete opinion, if someone is willing to just end a relationship over their partner wearing Nappies then I am sorry, but I think they are just simply very thoughtless, emotionless and heartless etc, I am sorry to sound mean but where is the respect and love if a woman would leave her partner over wearing Nappies? I totally respect if she didn't want anything to do with it, for example if she just agreed to let me wear Nappies when she is not around, but to end a whole relationship over, is just nasty and heartless.

    I have told many women that I speak to online as friends etc and a lot of them totally accept it and say they wouldn't dream of leaving their partner if he liked to wear Nappies, most see it as a funny thing and just laugh and literately think nothing of it Then there comes the heartless ones who make a huge deal of it, but seriously guys, who needs them sort of people in your life? Forget them, everybody is different and a lot of people are accepting of our fetish more than you would think There are lovely people and just nasty people who don't deserve your time.

  9. #9


    LaaaAAAAAAaaame! I'm so sorry to hear that. I hope that, given some more time, she (somehow) comes to realize that this isn't a desire that can be undone by starvation, and she allows you to resume wearing, even if only in private. That's kind of the boat I'm in. My wife and I had been married for almost thirteen years when she stumbled upon some adult-sized cloth diapers in a cabinet in the garage. The inevitable conversation followed. She felt a bit hurt by the fact that I'd kept it from her for so long, but I guess I was persuasive in justifying my decision to hide it because she came around pretty quickly. I let her know that, having kept it private for so many years, I was perfectly happy to carry on that way. We talked a bit about how the kids ought not to know, etc.--common sense stuff, in my opinion--and to make a long story short, my diaper habit continues largely as it has since I was six years old. When I have time to myself, I'll get out the diapers; when I don't, they're hidden away.

    Although I certainly don't have data to back this up, I would guess that coming out years into ones marriage actually has one of the better coming-out success rates. At least where "success" is defined as "not breaking up." Yes, I suppose this sort of "trapping" might be morally objectionable to some, but then relationships aren't all selfless. One must usually play to win. I'm not big on the idea that ones mate needs to know how one masturbates and whatnot before marriage, so if that's your diaper habit in a nutshell, I think there's plenty of precedent--from the vanilla side--for shutting up about it. Anyway... The longer you're in a relationship, the more the other person knows about you, your interests, etc. In this context, a "thing" for diapers will appear smaller and less threatening. The other side of this, of course, is that your relationship has to be going well. If it's not, there's probably good chance that pre-existing tension is going to be blamed on, or otherwise associated with, the diapers. If that happens, digging out is going to be a lot harder.
    Last edited by Cottontail; 08-Feb-2016 at 16:29.

  10. #10


    Puyallup, I'm sorry you're going through this. It's the tough thing about takes two and those two don't always see eye to eye!

    Sounds like you've made the only tenable decision at the moment. However it doesn't seem fair for your wife to use your kids as fodder for manipulation. Ugh. Praying for you and your fam.

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