Hehehe...I was kinda naughty today. XD

I just ordered my first pair of footie pajamas from Jumpin' Jammers today: http://www.jumpinjammerz.com/blue-duck-rubber-ducky-adult-hooded-footed-onesie-pajama/

Around $57 (including the shipping); kinda pricey.

Plus she's known that I've been trying to find a pair of footie jammies at Value Village for months and months with no success; she'll understand and be chill with it all, plus she knows I'm still a little self conscious/shy/embarrassed about asking for stuff like that; not like I'll be in any real trouble....but still, hehehe, I feel just a little naughty for technically stealing her credit card info. XD

PS: Anyone else order from Jumpin Jammers, and if so how long did it usually take? I'm guesstimating about a week or two?

Just got the email that the sleeper has been shipped today; hopefully I get it around this time next week; Tuesday would be ideal because that's when mommy and I always go shopping over a hundred miles north in the city where nobody knows me and so I'm free to dress how I want; usually shortalls and a hoodie and mom's perfectly fine with me looking like a little kid; she thinks it's cute. Tuesday's are always the best hahaha. XD

Oh, and she did find out about the card and she was fine with it, but warned me that next time I really do have to ask before using it because it could get overdrawn....hadn't thought about that; I just sorta knew that there was probably enough in the account. And there was, so there was no harm done anyway. Phew! XD

The jammies came in today; that was sooner than I thought it would be! ......Gonna wear them when mommy and daddy call me down to watch a movie with them tonight. Mommy's already seen me in them; kinda nervous about daddy seeing me though.....not sure what he'll say if anything at all. Mommy laughed and said I looked funny then quickly corrected herself and said she meant I look cute; it was a little uncomfortable but I'm glad she likes it either way/she can have fun with it. She assured me everything was okay and that she has a lot of "quirks" too.....I know what that means lol. XD That's one of the main reasons I feel comfortable enough to risk being myself in front of them; I've seen their own toy box and it's quirkier/much more adult than mine LOL...

It's nice to have parents that are understanding. Mine flipped out when they found out about my little side.

That was a big fear of mine....when I was a little kid dad kinda flipped out about it, so I kept it a secret for years and it just sorta messed me up even worse. He's a lot more understanding now but is still a little weirded out about it.....haha, although he did jokingly sing the rubber ducky song that Ernie from Sesame Street sings.....I took that as a good sign hahaha. XD

Tomorrow Mommy and I are driving into the city again to run errands. Gonna try to open up about it a bit more/let them know that I've thought about what dad said/threatened a while back; that if I want to act like/be treated like a baby then I can't have/enjoy the best of both worlds, and that is sincerely what I'd like....I guess a part of me is just hesitant because I'm still not sure if that's what they really want....ideally I'd want them to have fun with it and see it as a bonding experiencing after our years with no contact. And still a little hesitant because I'm afraid of turning into a quivering mass of tears and breaking down in front of them....I know they wouldn't hold it against me; might even help in the long run but still, I get pretty embarrassed when I cry in front of others which makes me wanna cry even more. I'm thinking after a while of not having to hide who I really am all the time though that something will change in me and I'll be happy again/not be so lonely/angry/depressed/self-hating all the time.

Hi Johnny. I hope you can get the courage together to talk with her. I know how hard that is, but it will most likely be well worth it. In my personal experience, I find that being treated like a child allows me to become more helpful, more happy, more accepting of others and more able to talk to others in general. I was so shy that I would not speak at all, or if I did it was in halting effort.
I was pulled in both directions as a child. My mom wanted me to be a baby forever and my dad wanted me grown up. The mixed signals and changes of direction have caused me a lot of grief since. I hope you can get a grip and learn to deal. It helps a lot.

BlueGrey said:

Hi Johnny. I hope you can get the courage together to talk with her. I know how hard that is, but it will most likely be well worth it. In my personal experience, I find that being treated like a child allows me to become more helpful, more happy, more accepting of others and more able to talk to others in general. I was so shy that I would not speak at all, or if I did it was in halting effort.
I was pulled in both directions as a child. My mom wanted me to be a baby forever and my dad wanted me grown up. The mixed signals and changes of direction have caused me a lot of grief since. I hope you can get a grip and learn to deal. It helps a lot.

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Yea it will help you to know, that they know.
But they probably know more than you think already.
I know how are it is to tell your parents what's what. It's hard enough when you've had a normal childhood.
For you it must be very different .
But as I said to you before, they want the best for you and they want you to be happy.

We are hear for you Johnny.

Your freand.

Sisi

Johnny, it's great that you were able to be around your parents while wearing the sleeper. I don't think I could ever do that with my parents.

What color / print are they?

Mattew said:

What color / print are they?

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The link he posted shows them.

Oops. Sorry. Missed that. Thanks