I've worn diapers for years, and typically go for the 'best' (in order of discovery, that was Molicare, Abena X-Plus (then M4), Dry 24/7, etc). Often I like to swaddle myself in an ABU Simple or Fabine or ... You get the idea.
But. I need something I can wear for work ("bullpen" computer programming situation, and occasionally long days in court as an expert witness), and when flying. I need capacity - flying especially, you can't just pull over to the side of a cloud to relieve. Not "all day amazing maximum capacity," but, if I have a wet accident, it shouldn't leak. (I also occasionally have IBS issues, that result in skid marks at best; worst case, I've leaked through boxers, jeans, and had to scrub a chair ... That was almost acceptable when I had my own office, but I joined a new startup with an "open office" thing going on, and, yeah. Not so much anymore.)
I've tried all the disposable underwear products. They all suck. Even the ones that are supposed to be 'overnight.' I've tried the Abena Abri-Flex Air Plus Pull-Ons, Extra, Medium M3; the Tranquility Premium OverNight Pull-Ons; the Northshore FlexSupreme Pull-On...
The thing is, I'm not 100% incontinent. Most of the time I can make it to a bathroom in time. I don't want to change a diaper 4x/day or more, nor do I want to sit in a wet diaper all day at the office, no matter how great.
So I'd love to find something with decent capacity (one good wetting), that can be removed and re-fastened reliably (none of the "refastenable tapes" are actually refastenable, in my experience) throughout a day of wearing. If there's a pull-on style that doesn't leak like a sieve during the first wet, that would work too.
Am I dreaming the impossible dream? Thanks in advance for any suggestions!