what is the most embarassing or humilating thing that happened in your life that really caused emotional trauma?

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gigglymuppet

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for me I am told by my mom that I was like 7-8 yrs.' old and my whole family knew I was a bed wetter but most just made some type of special arrangement (like sleeping on a bed with a rubber sheet). My aunt who seemed to not like me because my dad was a real piece of crap(her thought at the time was I'd turn out to be just like him) well anyway. Mom dropped me off by her to spend the weekend while she took a well deserved vacation.(single mom working 2 jobs and me a very sickly kid with severe Asthma). I wish I could give her a vacation now (she has had a double Mastectomy and has incurable Cancer)My mom is so strong, awesome and my best friend) Ok,ok! Well she dropped me off by me aunt and she or us went to the supermarket and she bought me a Big box of diapers and supposedly not only forced me to wear them the whole weekend she made me play outside and get babysat on one of the afternoon by a girl I am told I was friends with to babysit me. My mom said she'd never seen me so distraught and it literally changed me as a person(made me more introverted and shy) Today up until a few years ago when I was fighting for my life and diagnosed as a paraplegic an Anoxic brain injury, my aunt came to see me in the hospital many times but I felt something inside about her I couldn't explain. Then my mom told me about what she'd done to me and how she treated me. that feeling I couldn't explain was Anger & hatred. I am not nice or courteous to her ever and could care less what she says or thinks of me as far as I'm concerned that was child abuse and she got away with it. I tried to confront her about it one time and she told me it never happened and I was crazy while she couldn't get into her car to leave fast enough....So what's yours,we all have em' I have more 2 to be exact and will add them as this thread gets wings. It's healthy to talk about this or let it out, this is the first time I've ever spoke of this and yeah it makes me angry but it felt good to share this with our community.
 
Mine is simple enough and the older members have all heard it. I was a senior in college coming home for the weekend. My parents were having company for dinner. The invited husband was responsible for the television hookup for the Nixon-Kruschiev debates. I on the other hand, was having my world crash around me for a number of reasons. It was 1970. The Vietnam War was raging on, as were demonstrations for Civil Rights and I was actively involved in both. For all four years in college, I was dealing with severe depression, something I tried to anesthetize with lots of alcohol and drugs. My Sophomore year I had been dumped by my boyfriend and I was being sexually used by older male students, me for alcohol. My junior year I was back with my boyfriend and we smoked a lot of weed.

I came home that weekend for dinner, and just as dinner started, I started crying and couldn't stop. I excused myself to my bedroom, which was in the attic. I went back to school on Sunday because I was so close to graduating. That week my mom searched my room, probably looking for drugs, but what she found were my diapers and gay porn, something I had kept hidden from them.

She made an appointment for me with a psychiatrist at a residential mental facility outside of Princeton. Waiting in that waiting room, not knowing what to expect was perhaps the single most, weirdest thing I've ever had to do. Being gay in 1970 could, and often did, put you into a mental facility since homosexuality was considered a mental illness and anti-social. The door opened and I forced myself to walk into his office. Right off we started talking about my infantalism, as it was called, and liking and having sex with boys. He asked me if I had ever tried to commit suicide and I told him yes, twice. He gave me a card with his home phone number on it, just in case.

There's nothing quite like being forced to tell a complete stranger that you like wetting yourself, diapers, feel like a baby, and have sex with guys. I was glad to graduate and move far, far away. But graduating also meant leaving people I loved and really cared about. When I wrote my novel a few years ago, I wrote a chapter called, "Being Pushed". Often, we get pushed through life by all the hard and unyielding elements that not just confront us, but assail us. We are pushed by what society wants, the job market, school, friends, the media......all of it, and sometimes in the flow, we get lost. I was lost for several years until I met the woman who would be my wife.
 
having my car searched by the same cops and them seeing my sick obsession in the car multiple times. Having my room searched while locked in jail. And leaving my diaper bag at my ex gfs house after we broke up.:frown:
 
My mom telling people that I didnt want to squat in the corn fields "like all the others who do NOT have any problem with that" when we were travelling with car through Europe. I felt so ashamed and intimidated about her discussing this with others and that she did it with me present.
Needless to say, I hardly spend any time with my mother nowadays, she still tries to embarass me in front of others.

Sorry for the rant, I seem to go nuclear about anything these days...I think I need a new plushie.
 
magnolia said:
My mom telling people that I didnt want to squat in the corn fields "like all the others who do NOT have any problem with that" when we were travelling with car through Europe. I felt so ashamed and intimidated about her discussing this with others and that she did it with me present.
Needless to say, I hardly spend any time with my mother nowadays, she still tries to embarass me in front of others.

Sorry for the rant, I seem to go nuclear about anything these days...I think I need a new plushie.

I've had a few instances of bathroom-related awkwardness myself. One time I frustrated my father when I needed to go in a rural area and mistakenly had him drive to a fast-food place that wasn't there. I remember him complaining about having to drive in another direction to get to another restaurant.

I can't say it's the only factor, but perhaps my negative experiences with public restrooms helped fuel my desire to finally wear diapers.
 
Trauma in general? Loss of my beagle pup Lucy. She died by the car I had to drive for my high school years. My sister was driving.

As for embarrassing? I was bringing up a video on youtube for my english class. There was a victoria secrets underwear ad that popped up. The guys in my class laughed and mocked me. In turn I stood up, slammed my fist into the desk, cracking the cheap wooden top, swore at all of them saying just how tired of their shit I was, how I wanted to gut every single last one of them and hang them from the flag pole. My teacher knew about how they tormented me and told the dean on them. While leaving school that day I broke down and cried in front of my entire class. Word had already spread and several girls I stood up for came to try to comfort me, but I pushed them away. That night I just wanted to die. I went as far as writing a note revealing the truth about who I was to my parents, saying sorry that I was such a mistake. Although the note was never found, i was sent to see a psychiatrist. My parents still watch me closely today for any signs of depression and one of my sisters harasses me about how I am treated special.
 
There were a lot of things that caused me emotional trauma, but one humiliating instance was when I was out with my mother when I was about 13 or 14. I was very shy, awkward, I looked down at my feet when I walked, couldn't make eye contact, and I didn't talk in public. I bumped into a man by accident but was too flustered to really say anything, though he chuckled, and didn't seem to mind. My stupid mom had to open her big fat mouth and say "Oh, sorry, sir. My daughter is mentally retarded." She smirked and acted all fucking smug. I am not mentally retarded (though I was diagnosed emotionally disturbed in school, and I suspect that I may be autistic.)
I wanted to punch the bitch in the face so badly.
 
Wow,but I gather you somehow didn't quit life by way of suicide(for that alone I commended you). It sounds like you had some extremely horrible years but you proved your in no way what so ever that your a quitter like I see with so many of our youths today. I assume you are doing much,much better now and even have a wife,who again I assume is either aware of your little side and more importantly supportive(correct me if I'm wrong). I was born the year you were experiencing these events,despite that an the obvious age difference, I'd like to say thank you for your reply and I it makes me happy to know you seem to persevere,many of us that will read this can learn from eachothers trauma's and humiliations and knowledge is empowerment. Thank you again dogboy and I wish nothing but the best life has to offer. Good on ya
 
I've been lucky I guess. I've suffered my fair share of embarrassing situations during my life. Ranging from wetting my pants in public and wetting the bed while away from home, through to getting beaten up in front of a crowd, being drunk in public, to perhaps my worst nightmare one of doing an awards presentation night in front of a large crowd but getting drunk first and making a fool out of myself while talking on the microphone.

Then there was the drunken karaoke night.....

But I haven't been traumatised by any of it. Embarrassed and humiliated at times certainly, but not traumatised.

Life goes on, and while I do care what others think of me, my life doesn't revolve around other peoples opinions. As we move through life, what seemed so important and cringeworthy at the time eventually becomes an amusing anecdote to be repeated for a laugh.

Many's the time I've had to just man up and keep going because life goes on. I try not to carry to much baggage with me as I trudge forward.
 
One thing that happened to me that really sticks out as embarrassing was when I was hoyer lifted out of bed into a wheelchair wearing only a diaper. Then I was wheeled down the hall into a shower room where I was showered.
 
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