Page 1 of 2 12 LastLast
Results 1 to 10 of 16

Thread: What are the pros and cons of therapy for this?

  1. #1

    Default What are the pros and cons of therapy for this?

    Let me start by saying I don't think being ab/dl is anything that I need to work through or cure or whatever. I understand that it is now a part of who I am, I'm at complete peace with it, and my parents and girlfriend know about it and (for the most part) are accepting of it. I say for the most part because my dad spent the better part of an hour trying to wrap his head around it and telling me that it's ot socially acceptable and it's abnormal yadda yadda bunch of stuff I already know. He suggested therapy/counseling, asking if I thought it might "help". As I've said, I don't see a need to stop wearing diapers and such, but I wondered if maybe a therapist of some sort could possibly help me discover WHY I turned out to be ab/dl. I've always sort of had a fascination with helplessness, but I'm unsure of whether there was a definitive origin to my coming into this interest. So, what are your thoughts? Would therapy or counseling of some sort be of ANY benefit whatsoever, or should I avoid it altogether?

  2. #2
    MarchinBunny

    Default



    Quote Originally Posted by parkerpeter View Post
    Let me start by saying I don't think being ab/dl is anything that I need to work through or cure or whatever. I understand that it is now a part of who I am, I'm at complete peace with it, and my parents and girlfriend know about it and (for the most part) are accepting of it. I say for the most part because my dad spent the better part of an hour trying to wrap his head around it and telling me that it's ot socially acceptable and it's abnormal yadda yadda bunch of stuff I already know. He suggested therapy/counseling, asking if I thought it might "help". As I've said, I don't see a need to stop wearing diapers and such, but I wondered if maybe a therapist of some sort could possibly help me discover WHY I turned out to be ab/dl. I've always sort of had a fascination with helplessness, but I'm unsure of whether there was a definitive origin to my coming into this interest. So, what are your thoughts? Would therapy or counseling of some sort be of ANY benefit whatsoever, or should I avoid it altogether?
    I think a therapist can help you possibly understand it better, but not likely find out the exact reason on why. However, in most cases it will also depend on the therapist in question. With the cost of it, I wouldn't say it's worth it unless you feel you need it.

  3. #3

    Default

    I don't know enough of your background to make any judgement on whether or not therapy would be beneficial for you. Maybe an introduction thread is in order? In any case, if you, like many others in the community have been dealing with the concept of Infantilism for the most part of your life, do you think, that even if you were able to pinpoint the origin of your ABDLism and work on "solutions" to get rid of it, could you? Would you? If you answered no to those then therapy might be pointless in your case.

  4. #4

    Default

    An introduction thread? Like, explain my situation ab/dl-wise? I could, but Idk if many would care to read it. Worth a shot, I guess.

    I'm very mentally and emotionally stable in general. I haven't had a very hard life. My parents are divorced. That sucked for a while, but that's the worst thing that's happened to me. I'm a very open-minded dude, but I have my limits as to just how weird I can get without feeling self-conscious. Honestly I don't think I'd ever want or need to get rid of my little side. It's part of me and I'm fine with it, I'm just curious about the logistics of it, really.

  5. #5

    Default

    If, as you say, you're at peace with it, I don't see the point of a therapist for it. I think so little is known about us that pinning down any real source, even with a professional, is unlikely. Then again, if you did learn the cause of it, what would it avail you? With intense study, you might be able to tell me why I like the toppings I do on my pizza but I don't think it would incline me to pick different ones.

  6. #6

    Default

    The human psyche is pretty much the archetype of a complex system. The development of particular sexual predilections is not well understood, because there are so many potential variables - genetics, gestational environment, upbringing, diet, medical issues, socialisation, etc. Potentially, a singular experience at a critical point can have an immense impact on a the way a person's mind develops, and the effect won't be fully realised until years or even decades later. TBH, until we can construct a perfect model of a human being, which requires both a perfect understanding of genetics and gestational environment, and some way to record every single influence on a person, whether sensory or otherwise, I very much doubt we will be able to backtrack to a particular point in someone's life and say "this is what caused it". And we are a very, very long way from that. Psychiatry is not (yet) a hard science, no matter what some people may believe.

    I very much doubt that a therapist can do anything except help you come to terms with your paraphilia, and by the sound of it, you don't need help with that, so it would be a waste of time and money. The psychiatric profession’s history of “curing” unusual sexual predilections is one of miserable failure (and, by modern standards, a history of more than a few human rights violations).

    As for your dad, you might point out that homosexuality didn't use to be socially acceptable, nor did inter-racial marriage. Adultery is still frowned upon, even if you won't get stoned to death for it these days. Things change. And whether it's socially acceptable really isn't relevant, as like most kinks, such as BDSM, it doesn't have to be social. Unless you have some desire to walk around openly as an ABDL, it's a private matter.

  7. #7

    Default

    PRO - talking about things NEARLY ALWAYS makes them better understood
    CON - it costs money

    Realistically, this won't BE "cured", but it can be stuffed into a box, it that's what your father wants. Tell him to quit smoking and drinking, and maybe give up his sex life, and let's see how that works out for him first... It could lead to two nervous wrecks in the same house, though, if you both give up something that gives you both such great pleasure..

    Him first....

    PS Therapy could help with the helplessness...

  8. #8

    Default

    I'm going to say that psychiatry is something that everyone should engage with (regardless of if they have a problem or not), obviously provided that they are able to afford such a service.

    Now ... this is an idea that has changed over a significant period of time. I used to be like many people on here and thought that it wouldn't be worth it. It would be too difficult to find the right person to be able to connect with. That I might find it too difficult to open up about things. However, i have seen psychiatrist for a different reason (I have had depression that was a little difficult to treat by my normal physician and wasn't really improving, seeing a psychiatrist really helped with all that).

    Whilst the reason i went was definitely because of a specific problem that i had. One which is now significantly better (and i would go so far to say has no resolved despite still being on medications to make sure i stay well). However, there is more that i gained from my interactions with my psychiatrist. Now i have not yet discussed anything with regards to my ABDLism with my psychiatrist. I just felt that for me it wasn't really necessary for me as it didn't relate to my depression. But i can definitely say that overall i feel a marked improvement in my entire mental health. In aspects that i didn't intend (or realise) were issues for me.

    Yes, my depression was the significant issue for me. But after seeing my psychiatrist he was able to help assist me with my overall mood and i would definitely say improved my emotional wellbeing/responsiveness. I generally am able to feel more like myself and feel that i am better at dealing with emotional situations better. There were issues with my family that he identified and is helping me to work on so that i can better deal with the way my family acts towards me. He was also there to be able to assist with my relationship and actually made me feel normal about the kind of relationship i was in (it wasn't anything bad or anything like that but i was in a relationship with someone who was older then i was).

    So my opinion. If you are interested in seeing a psychiatrist and can afford to do so without stress, then i say go for it. You might be surprised what it is that you discover and are able ti improve. However, i would say don't go with the idea that you will be able to identify why you are ABDL. Psychiatry is more about potentially identifying a source so that you are able to better understand and accept yourself. The psychiatrist that i am with is not interested in "changing" who i am because there are problems.

    You will need to invest a little bit of time to find someone who you can relate with. Something which can be a bit difficult.

  9. #9
    MarchinBunny

    Default



    Quote Originally Posted by Zeek61 View Post
    I'm going to say that psychiatry is something that everyone should engage with (regardless of if they have a problem or not), obviously provided that they are able to afford such a service.

    Now ... this is an idea that has changed over a significant period of time. I used to be like many people on here and thought that it wouldn't be worth it. It would be too difficult to find the right person to be able to connect with. That I might find it too difficult to open up about things. However, i have seen psychiatrist for a different reason (I have had depression that was a little difficult to treat by my normal physician and wasn't really improving, seeing a psychiatrist really helped with all that).

    Whilst the reason i went was definitely because of a specific problem that i had. One which is now significantly better (and i would go so far to say has no resolved despite still being on medications to make sure i stay well). However, there is more that i gained from my interactions with my psychiatrist. Now i have not yet discussed anything with regards to my ABDLism with my psychiatrist. I just felt that for me it wasn't really necessary for me as it didn't relate to my depression. But i can definitely say that overall i feel a marked improvement in my entire mental health. In aspects that i didn't intend (or realise) were issues for me.

    Yes, my depression was the significant issue for me. But after seeing my psychiatrist he was able to help assist me with my overall mood and i would definitely say improved my emotional wellbeing/responsiveness. I generally am able to feel more like myself and feel that i am better at dealing with emotional situations better. There were issues with my family that he identified and is helping me to work on so that i can better deal with the way my family acts towards me. He was also there to be able to assist with my relationship and actually made me feel normal about the kind of relationship i was in (it wasn't anything bad or anything like that but i was in a relationship with someone who was older then i was).

    So my opinion. If you are interested in seeing a psychiatrist and can afford to do so without stress, then i say go for it. You might be surprised what it is that you discover and are able ti improve. However, i would say don't go with the idea that you will be able to identify why you are ABDL. Psychiatry is more about potentially identifying a source so that you are able to better understand and accept yourself. The psychiatrist that i am with is not interested in "changing" who i am because there are problems.

    You will need to invest a little bit of time to find someone who you can relate with. Something which can be a bit difficult.
    It all depends on the therapist and also the person going to see said therapist. You essentially made the connection that everyone should engage in it, by only one clear example, your own experience. With such a bold claim, I don't know, I would expect you to have better reasoning than you had a good experience.

    Can everyone benefit from therapy? I am pretty sure that is the case, but is it worth the time, effort, and money? I suppose that all depends on why you would want to go in the first place. Also, even if one was to decide to go, it doesn't necessarily mean their experience will be as good as yours. Could end up quiet the opposite in fact.

  10. #10

    Default

    Sounds to me like your dad just wants you to be cured when he says 'help'. Really, the only cure for this is brainwashing, which is morally wrong, at least for what most people consider as morals. Its not like there is some type of addictive substance involved in this, the need you feel literally is coming from the inner wiring of your brain, kinda hard to change that without actually wanting to stop based on personal desire, and not social desire.

    If it isn't interfering with your ability to be a good boyfriend, and to function in society as an adult, then you don't actually need any more help then that. If you are looking for a source as to why you developed this way, a therapist could maybe help you figure it out, but they could never give you a definitive answer, just some ideas. Something like that is probably less important unless you are trying to work through trauma.

    Is it socially acceptable, no, not yet. But many things have gone in and out of social acceptability. Homosexuality and polygamy have been socially acceptable in old societies, now homosexuality is acceptable again, however polygamy isn't in american society. I wouldn't base my personal life on social standards, but managing my social life based on social standards, can be an important thing to do.

    Pro's and con's of talking about this to a therapist? Con's would be that if you get an overly conservative (usually heavily religious) therapist, you run the risk of them trying to 'fix' you to be normal. For most therapists, they generally find this lifestyle as being 'not that big of a deal'. Here are some pros:

    1. Help you get self acceptance about this.
    2. Help you manage a balance between your AB/DL life and your adult responsibilities.
    3. Help a therapist understand you more deeply while trying to work with you on other unrelated stresses or problems in your life.
    4. Help you understand and deal with the difficulty you may encounter in relationships and social contact based on your lifestyle.
    5. Get people off your back by telling them you visited a therapist who said there was nothing wrong with your lifestyle.

    Those are really the main reasons I can think of. If you don't think that any of them apply that much to you, then it probably isn't worth the expense of visiting a therapist. If your dad is the only one who is giving you some resistance with regard to your AB life, then it probably isn't worth going to a therapist just to get him to stop bothering you, instead, take some time of personal reflection, and research, and then stand up for yourself to him.

    (edit) As Zeek61 pointed out, if you can afford a therapist, sometimes it is good to visit just because they can be helpful. Personally, I think everybody could benefit from an occasional visit to a therapist, but I guess I'm surrounded by a lot of people who hold their problems in.

Similar Threads

  1. Pros and Cons (and Pros and Cons)
    By timidlythinking in forum Diaper Talk
    Replies: 11
    Last Post: 28-Sep-2013, 17:24
  2. Pros and Cons of Pull up style diapers
    By Tmac136 in forum Diaper Talk
    Replies: 4
    Last Post: 10-Apr-2012, 15:37
  3. Replies: 8
    Last Post: 26-Nov-2011, 16:23
  4. Diapers pros. cons.
    By Gooddays in forum Diaper Talk
    Replies: 5
    Last Post: 30-Aug-2010, 05:23
  5. Being 18 has it's pros and cons
    By Daisuke in forum Off-topic
    Replies: 10
    Last Post: 10-Mar-2009, 00:32

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •  
ADISC.org - the Adult Baby / Diaper Lover / Incontinence Support Community.
ADISC.org is designed to be viewed in Firefox, with a resolution of at least 1280 x 1024.