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Thread: Another apoligy and an explanation.

  1. #1

    Question Another apoligy and an explanation.

    First off, I really wanted to apologize for all the not listing to your advice I have been doing, being an accidental Jerk to all of you, for lying and for taking things too far, I actually respect all of you that I contact, and I really value your option, the thing is, I should not have allowed everything to take over like this, but there are reasons, first off the reason why I am so mad at my brother and why I blame him, other than the violence and his bipolar, is because well I can usually see the good in everything and everyone, probably due to being a Christian, but due to his behavior and the way everything goes on with him as well as his Faux-macho attitude, Trying to be the bad guy, and him attempting to be a spirt of fear (his words, not mine,) Itís hard/near impossible to see good in my brother, even though I know it exists, and I just want a normal Brother/Brother relationship with him, also I admittedly did used college as an escape from him, and well this past semester he pretty much through a wrench in that, also Things have been stressful as it is without him In college, but with him there its 1000 times worse, because of the obvious with his bipolar and everything, also because of him, and to a certain extent my grandmother, (although I donít really blame her that much Due to the fact she is trying to help.), I used to have a set routine or at least a semi- fixed one, It varied but not too much, now thanks to My Brother, All of that routine/order is out the window, because of his rudeness and violence, and his unpredictability, part of the time heís nice, and part of the time heís not, You know how this wares on me, because I usually see the world in whatís wrong and whatís right, now there are just so many gray areas that is insane, and saddening to me, and all of that plus the way things are right now leads to overload, you know how thereís sensory overload, well this is emotional overload, which happens when there is so much moral grays that I JUST CANíT TAKE IT ANY MORE, I JUST WANT THINGS TO CHANGE BACK TO THE WAY IT WAS, BEFORE MY EVIL BROTHER POPPED IN, also, just when it feels like everything will be okay, the stress and anxiety builds up, to unreasonable levels, due to the aforementioned, and everything just blows up in my face and I tend to do things I regret later, I know I have the blog now, and I feel itís really helping, but I feel this apology needed to be said via article, also I will admit, It started out as mostly me getting advice but it feels like more and more I post stuff just because I need a pity party, and yes there are things I use for advice too, and also I look up ABDL images/stories which Iím not 100% sure if there considered porn which I admittedly fantasize about, and want them to become real, to escape my life, Anyway I hope you now understand why things are so rocky, and I hope you can accept my sincerest apology and I would really like your prayers and advise for my grandmother and I, because this is the hopefully last semester and I want things to go well, and not pretend that it is for once in my life, and cause a bad semester, also I want to have good days from now on, Thank you.

  2. #2

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    Sometimes the world is that way for all of us. Hope it feels better to get that out of your system here.

  3. #3

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    Quote Originally Posted by Maxx View Post
    Sometimes the world is that way for all of us. Hope it feels better to get that out of your system here.
    Agreed, I defently feel better today, I guess i just needed to get that out of the system.

  4. #4

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    Sorry to burst your bubble, but you don't have to be a Christian to be a good person. They are not mutually exclusive to each other.

  5. #5
    MarchinBunny

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    It's really hard to read everything but I did. All those commas.

    Well ... I don't really understand what is going on as you didn't explain it here. Some context would be nice. Or did you post about it somewhere else? I did get that you are having some issues with your brother .. and that is really about all.

    Also, as the above poster said, Being good and seeing good in people really has nothing to do with being religious. Heck, I am an atheist, and even when someone tried to kill me, literally ... I still remained friends with them and saw the good. Though .. I might be a severe case of someone who forgives a little to easily.

    Anyway, it would be great to have some context .. other wise there isn't much I can say.

  6. #6

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    Quote Originally Posted by Wombat View Post
    Sorry to burst your bubble, but you don't have to be a Christian to be a good person. They are not mutually exclusive to each other.
    I understand, and i know there are Christians that are not good persons, just like there are non Christians who are good persons, also this was meant as a bit of a venting thing, there wasn't any bubble to burst, really.

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    Quote Originally Posted by brabbit1987 View Post
    It's really hard to read everything but I did. All those commas.

    Well ... I don't really understand what is going on as you didn't explain it here. Some context would be nice. Or did you post about it somewhere else? I did get that you are having some issues with your brother .. and that is really about all.

    Also, as the above poster said, Being good and seeing good in people really has nothing to do with being religious. Heck, I am an atheist, and even when someone tried to kill me, literally ... I still remained friends with them and saw the good. Though .. I might be a severe case of someone who forgives a little to easily.

    Anyway, it would be great to have some context .. other wise there isn't much I can say.
    I get it, and I do apologist for the confusion, I was just under A LOT of stress at the time, but i feel way better now. My brother is bipolar, and well let's just say i was under a lot of stress at the time, and i agree, you don't need to be christian to be a good person, and i do apoligise for my rambling in my post. I will admit it's a bad habit of mine, anyway, the reason i posted it at the time, was that i was under a lot of stress due to my brother, but i figured out why, that mabie I just need to focus on myself, and forgive my brother, despite how hard it is at times, due to he is bipolar, and i am autistic, which i did today. I feel way better because of it, still the reason why i posted this is that there was a lot of stress I needed out, and I just really needed to vent, that's all.

  7. #7
    MarchinBunny

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    Quote Originally Posted by KittyninjaW View Post
    I get it, and I do apologist for the confusion, I was just under A LOT of stress at the time, but i feel way better now. My brother is bipolar, and well let's just say i was under a lot of stress at the time, and i agree, you don't need to be christian to be a good person, and i do apoligise for my rambling in my post. I will admit it's a bad habit of mine, anyway, the reason i posted it at the time, was that i was under a lot of stress due to my brother, but i figured out why, that mabie I just need to focus on myself, and forgive my brother, despite how hard it is at times, due to he is bipolar, and i am autistic, which i did today. I feel way better because of it, still the reason why i posted this is that there was a lot of stress I needed out, and I just really needed to vent, that's all.
    Understandable, it sometimes is good to just get things off your chest.

  8. #8

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    Eventually you will move out and be away from your brother, and life should get better for you. Keep working hard and plan for a better future. It's something that we all do when we're young. It's hard to get started but once a body is in motion, it tends to stay in motion. Sometimes it gains momentum. My first job after graduation paid me in the poverty level, but through the years I made more and more. Independence is a great thing, so keep your dreams alive and do all the little things that will take you in that direction.

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