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Thread: I think I'm gay.

  1. #1

    Default I think I'm gay.

    I'm sexually attracted to men, and I feel absolutely terrible for it. It has taken me a long time to come to the realization that I'm gay. It was something I discovered by accident, and men touching me is very interesting for me.

    (I often have fantasies about other guys... and have crushes on men and women)

    I don't know why I feel this way, I want to get into a relationship with another male, but am afraid to.

    Is it normal to feel bad about this? I feel slightly broken, and weird.

    but continuing onto this, I think I may be BI honestly, just not too into women compared to men.

  2. #2

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    For a little social science, you might be interested in the Kinsey Scale, which rates sexual attraction along a spectrum, rather than as a single label that's supposed to encompass everything about you.

    As to your feelings, it's completely normal to feel bad about being gay. Culture and religion in most countries today still educates people that homosexuality is wrong, and even though views are changing, the changes are recent and the guilt that you can feel for not being like others is a real thing. It's okay to feel that way, you don't have to beat yourself up further because you feel bad or can't instantly accept all the feelings that you have.

    What I think is important to understand, as you work through this, is that you are who you are. Trying to deny a part of yourself and the feelings that you have doesn't lead to change, just to misery and depression. You have to work with what you've been given. If it's only fear of what will happen, go slowly, explore slowly, and don't do anything that makes you uncomfortable. You'll figure out what you want as time goes on.

  3. #3

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    It has taken decades for me to be comfortable about being Gay, since I am of the older generation where being Gay was seen as a psychotic mental illness and treated as such with everything from electric shock to massive doses of anti-psychotic medications.

  4. #4

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    Yeah, I was actively gay during the '60s when it was dangerous to be out. Not only are things much better today, but there are cities in the U. S. that are more open and accepting. You do have to find your own way. For me, while I was in college, I found someone I was attracted to. We had a lot in common and we're still friend to this day. I'm bi and I always wanted a family, so I married the person who would become my wife, but this was after college.

    It's much more difficult to accept being outside the social norms when you're young. It was for me and that's probably why I chose a more accepted lifestyle, but with time, one begins to understand who they are and what they need. You didn't choose to be gay. Nature did that so don't let anyone but a blame trip on you. We all want to be happy, so decide which would make you happy.

  5. #5

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    I've come to the conclusion I'm gay.

    Most of my feelings towards women, It's hard to explain, its not attraction, but its seeing beauty, and wanting to be that beautiful(Yes, I'm transgender) so hard very confusing and its been a emotional rollercoster lol.

    Thanks for the support guys <3, feels good to know who I am, I still have my doubts though occasionally.

  6. #6

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    Quote Originally Posted by mantlepython View Post
    I've come to the conclusion I'm gay.

    Most of my feelings towards women, It's hard to explain, its not attraction, but its seeing beauty, and wanting to be that beautiful(Yes, I'm transgender) so hard very confusing and its been a emotional rollercoster lol.

    Thanks for the support guys <3, feels good to know who I am, I still have my doubts though occasionally.
    Good luck on your journey.

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