My SO wets the bed due to medication side effects, I need some advice.

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petnaby

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Hello everyone, I just came across this forum and it looks like a very friendly place.

I recently started a relationship with someone who wets the bed while sleeping due to medication side effects, and she's self conscious about it.

She uses goodnites and since her family doesn't know about it, I keep her stash and just refill her whenever she needs more.


What advice can you give me to help her be less self conscious about it? Are there any discreet alternatives?

She also hates to be spending so much on them (goes through 1 or 2 daily), what free/cheap alternatives are there?

Or just any advice in general.

Thanks!
 
Well, GoodNites are probably one of the cheaper diapers out there. You're probably not going to find anything much more affordable besides store brands. From what I hear - I've never worn them before - they're pretty discreet as it is so I don't see many more options there besides perhaps the GoodNites Tru-Fit, which are designed like underwear and hold a disposable pad.

If she has health insurance, there may be a chance they might pay for diapers, but obviously this would require a prescription from her doctor, and don't expect any quality brands.
 
KimbaStarshine said:
Well, GoodNites are probably one of the cheaper diapers out there. You're probably not going to find anything much more affordable besides store brands. From what I hear - I've never worn them before - they're pretty discreet as it is so I don't see many more options there besides perhaps the GoodNites Tru-Fit, which are designed like underwear and hold a disposable pad.

If she has health insurance, there may be a chance they might pay for diapers, but obviously this would require a prescription from her doctor, and don't expect any quality brands.



She does have Tru-Fit but since they're kinda expensive she doesn't use them as much, insurance is out of the question since her family doesn't know about it and I doubt she'd want to make an insurance claim on them :/
 
What is the medication used for and if theirs anyway I can help her not be self conscious about it just let me know ill be glad to help out
 
Jbradshaw90 said:
What is the medication used for and if theirs anyway I can help her not be self conscious about it just let me know ill be glad to help out


to treat an autoimmune disease, how would you help out?
 
First, there could be other medication that might help with the autoimmune problems. But I think the point Jbrashaw90 was making is how could we as a community help by offering support and understanding. There are other products available, but more important than that is the fact that lots of people suffer from various levels of incontinence. It is nothing to be ashamed of.
 
I would just urge that it's nothing to be embarrassed about.
 
She can certainly come here for advice and help if she wants. While there are a number of people on here who wear diapers by choice, not all of us are that way. This site has been one of the more understanding communities I have found regarding needs like hers.

With that said, I understand being self-conscious about needing protection, a lot of people don't like it. If she can get away with something like Goodnites, those are likely the cheapest alternative she will find out there, and only needing 1-2 per day means she isn't needing to rely on them for full bladder incontinence. I would not suggest going for a higher absorbency product as she really doesn't need it.

One thing she can always do is to see if she can have a discussion in private with her doctor about the medication she is on and the side effect it is causing. If she can accept the side effect for the benefit it gives her, then maybe the doctor can say something to her family about it and explain her needs. If there is a different medication that she can try, maybe she can get away from the side effect.

All in all, the best thing anyone can do is be understanding and caring. You are already providing a lot of this for her in that you keep her stash and refill it. It can be hard for her to understand when she feels like her body is betraying her by losing control like that, I know it took many years for me to come to terms with my issues. In the meantime, we're here to help if she wants.
 
Two other brands I have tried at Wal-Mart are Tena for women and Always Discreet. The Always are a good price if you can find a coupon. The Tena are usually 10.87 for 18 if she wears s/m. I think Tena works better for bedwetting especially if she does not sleep on her side. I still wear GoodNites more even though Tena Works better for me because they are cuter but it depends on her needs.
 
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The best way I that I was able to coupe with it was by telling a few of my closest friends and wearing around people in public things like that its better to talk with people than keep it inside thats where we become self conscious sometimes but like everyone here says if she wants to talk with us she can
 
Has she asked her doctor if there is a differed med he can proscribe that may stop the night time wettings,
allways go with a better diaper premium diapers have more absorbancy and leak less often then cheaper diapers.

When My OAB issue started up at first only my wife and Doctor new, after a while I decide to let my family know I needed to wear diapers, it took away the worry they would find out the wrong way and the wrong time.

I always recommend telling close family members especially the ones you see daily and live with.
Also have her see an urologist to make sure the meds aren't causing more issues that may lead to day time wettings
 
Clearly the best way to save money on absorbant products is to use cloth. I personally am not confident enough concerning leaks from the needed plastic pants, but if it works out for her, she could save a great deal. Get enough for a week she can go through and you could do her laundry so her condition won't be discovered if its really that much of a concern for her. I'd trust my family anytime with medical conditions, maybe you should talk to her again about that.
 
I'm going to restate what a few others have said and say that she should definitely talk to the family about this. Your family, especially close family, should be aware of any moderate-to-severe health issues in case something happens and you can't be there.

There is also no shame in talking to your doctor about these issues. That's what the doctor is there for. Your doctor may be able to provide an alternate medication for her condition or recommend a medical supply store with affordable incontinence underwear in your area. Besides, it's not usually a good idea to keep health secrets from your doctor. It may be a bit awkward to admit, but it's just like when a female sees a gynecologist for the first time -- it feels strange but it's no big deal.

Remember, around 25 million people in the US alone wear adult diapers for incontinence. There is nothing to be ashamed of; it's a common problem and all doctors are well-versed in solutions for it.

Good luck!

(Also, cloth is a more environmentally friendly option and is much cheaper in the long run, but you will need to get a good pair of plastic pants to prevent leaks if she is a heavy wetter)
 
I'm not quite sure from your original post, but I think you said she only wears at night and uses 1-2 Goodnights per night.

If she were to wear a tape on or pull on diaper that was made for adults she could most likely get by with only using 1 per night instead of the 1.5 Goodnights.

Even though the adult diapers would probably be more per diaper they would probably average less because of using less diapers.
 
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