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Thread: Confused about my sexuality

  1. #1

    Default Confused about my sexuality

    Sorry to start 2 threads in one day but itve been having a rough time.

    I must admit I'm a virgin. I have never been on a date or in a relationship. This is due in part to the fact that my visual impairment has prevented me from getting around as much as the average person but mostly it's because I've yet to find a solution for my e.d.

    I've been wanting a mommy for a long time now and have ALWAYS considered myself straight but I started talking to this guy on FetLife about a play date and he mentioned diapered cuddling and for some reason... It sounds so enticing. What's going on? I've never even considered such a thing before. I'm unsure of what to make of my feelings

  2. #2

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    Hi gnd,

    Firstly, no need to apologise. It's good to see members starting new discussions, and we're all here to try and support one another.

    Personally, I think the first thing to realise is that sexuality doesn't really exist in binary. People who identify as straight or gay are primarily attracted to one gender, but our sexuality exists on a spectrum. I'd identify as straight and the majority of sexual attraction I have is towards women, but I've sometimes been attracted to guys and there are occasions when watching adult material where I'm interested in the guy as well as the woman/women. That's all incredibly common.

    I think inexperience in sexual activities is also, as you say, a contributor to sexual uncertainty. It wasn't until I had a reasonable amount of sexual experience that I realised my idea of things I thought I would enjoy and things I did actually enjoy in the bedroom turned out to be quite different. So even being interested in certain sexual things doesn't mean that'll get you excited in practice, or vice-versa.

    Whether or not this is a comfort to hear - I also have a fairly serious disability and whilst that's an obstacle with some potential partners, I've been with quite a lot of women who've been really understanding about any mobility limitations which might need to be taken into account during sex.

    'What's going on' is that any offer of contact and intimacy sounds pretty good, especially if physical intimacy is not a common experience for you. Additionally, you're probably realising that your sexuality isn't binary. My advice would be to not worry. Whatever you find out about yourself from any experience with this FetLife guy, or from anyone else, will tell you in time what works for you sexually.

  3. #3

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    Sanch is right. Dont try to compartmentalize your sexuality. I identify as gay, am attracted to men. But, i used to like sex when it was still new and exciting. Now, i havent had intercourse sex in years. Women in dominant roles can be attractive to me, but I've never tried. I still know i am gay, but the sex isnt my identifier.

  4. #4

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    Having a fantasy about something with a guy doesn't mean you're gay, or even confused. It means you have an imagination, as nearly all of us do.

    I sometimes fantasize about flying even though I'm terrified of heights.

    I've written a story about being a girl, even though I know I'd be a disaster as one if it somehow magically happened.

    The library has a huge section devoted to fantasy and science fiction... 99% of it things that can't and won't happen, and wouldn't be anywhere near as exciting and fun in reality as the authors make them out to be.

    Talking about such things on a forum with another guy (or whatever...you never know on the interwebz) is fine. Don't be fooled into thinking reality would be anything like the fantasy.

  5. #5

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    Sexuity is hard to define for a lot of people but theres not harm in trying new things if you think you may be interested.

    Be open and honest with him and give it a go! Maybe you just end up with a really good friend an maybe you end up learning something about yourself!

  6. #6

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    I'm actually going through the same thing right now. Virgin and not sure about my sexuality. Like Sanch said, it probably is better to describe it all as a spectrum kind of thing. Fetlife has given me the opportunity that i'm still not sure if I'm going to take, to hang out with another guy. I was actually really into the idea for a little while, and then started to get cold feet. I don't think it is wrong to hold back a little bit though, I think it is important to take it slow, and get to know a person and be comfortable with them before you start to experiment sexually. I at first was thinking of making my situation a one night stand kinda thing, but now I would really prefer to just run across a guy who is gay/bi and AB or Daddy, and then make a small friendship first, just like I would prefer it to be with a Girl.

    I think that learning about your sexuality will be easier, if you are comfortable with the person that you are experimenting with, vs just having met them and not knowing much about them.

  7. #7

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    Quote Originally Posted by Tyger View Post
    I'm actually going through the same thing right now. Virgin and not sure about my sexuality. Like Sanch said, it probably is better to describe it all as a spectrum kind of thing. Fetlife has given me the opportunity that i'm still not sure if I'm going to take, to hang out with another guy. I was actually really into the idea for a little while, and then started to get cold feet. I don't think it is wrong to hold back a little bit though, I think it is important to take it slow, and get to know a person and be comfortable with them before you start to experiment sexually. I at first was thinking of making my situation a one night stand kinda thing, but now I would really prefer to just run across a guy who is gay/bi and AB or Daddy, and then make a small friendship first, just like I would prefer it to be with a Girl.

    I think that learning about your sexuality will be easier, if you are comfortable with the person that you are experimenting with, vs just having met them and not knowing much about them.
    Yeah, I know what you mean. What we've been talking about is getting together and playing together like two toddlers you know? Playing games and watching cartoons, that sort of thing. It sounds kinda fun because I've always wanted a playmate to play with. I've always wanted a mommy too to look after us.
    Anyway, we've not talked about "having sex" per-se but he did ask if I've ever had diaper cuddles and if not, would I want to. I don't know why, but I can't convince myself that I don't want to. I've always been attracted to women (or thought so) and have never questioned my sexuality but I kinda want to take him up on that offer. Why? I can't explain it.

  8. #8

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    Quote Originally Posted by gnd567 View Post
    Yeah, I know what you mean. What we've been talking about is getting together and playing together like two toddlers you know? Playing games and watching cartoons, that sort of thing. It sounds kinda fun because I've always wanted a playmate to play with. I've always wanted a mommy too to look after us.
    Anyway, we've not talked about "having sex" per-se but he did ask if I've ever had diaper cuddles and if not, would I want to. I don't know why, but I can't convince myself that I don't want to. I've always been attracted to women (or thought so) and have never questioned my sexuality but I kinda want to take him up on that offer. Why? I can't explain it.
    Cuddles might be all you want. As noted above, as long as it's someone you're generally comfortable with, it's going to be easier to tell what is good and what isn't.

  9. #9

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    Quote Originally Posted by gnd567 View Post
    Yeah, I know what you mean. What we've been talking about is getting together and playing together like two toddlers you know? Playing games and watching cartoons, that sort of thing. It sounds kinda fun because I've always wanted a playmate to play with. I've always wanted a mommy too to look after us.
    Anyway, we've not talked about "having sex" per-se but he did ask if I've ever had diaper cuddles and if not, would I want to. I don't know why, but I can't convince myself that I don't want to. I've always been attracted to women (or thought so) and have never questioned my sexuality but I kinda want to take him up on that offer. Why? I can't explain it.
    I'd take him up on a play date, having a play partner is a lot of fun in a non-sexual context. It is always pretty exciting to be able to sit in a diaper and T-shirt with another person around who can see you. I have done this a few times, usually while playing video games or watching a movie. I've had 2 or so sleep overs too. None of it has ever turned sexual, even when I had a diaper change, which has been a few times. I think starting off as play partners at least the first day would be a lot of fun, you can tell him that after the first day you will talk about cuddles more, and that right now you are not entirely sure, although you are kind of interested.

    Look me up on fetlife, TygerCub, if you want, and I can stock him for you.

  10. #10

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    Quote Originally Posted by Tyger View Post
    I'd take him up on a play date, having a play partner is a lot of fun in a non-sexual context. It is always pretty exciting to be able to sit in a diaper and T-shirt with another person around who can see you. I have done this a few times, usually while playing video games or watching a movie. I've had 2 or so sleep overs too. None of it has ever turned sexual, even when I had a diaper change, which has been a few times. I think starting off as play partners at least the first day would be a lot of fun, you can tell him that after the first day you will talk about cuddles more, and that right now you are not entirely sure, although you are kind of interested.

    Look me up on fetlife, TygerCub, if you want, and I can stock him for you.
    I'll will do that. I'm abdlmax. Thanks

    I've never had contact with another ab in person and I think I'll take him up on it. Even though he's gay and I don't think I am, I don't think Id have a problem with a diaper change even though I don't know what that's like.

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