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Thread: Crapy week.

  1. #1

    Default Crapy week.

    I know that I rarely post on the forums, but this week just blows.

    I had been dealing with a roommate that couldn't follow one simple rule. I caught him in the act, and then gave him a second chance because he would of been homeless after it. Two of his friends then proceeded to blow up on me because how wrong it was for me to want to kick him out in the first place.

    One of them even went to the length of threatening my own life. That right there made me kick him out. I haven't been in the best mind set with all of this and ended up smoking cigarettes again to ease up the stress that I could not relieve.

    So with my problem not being able to deal with all of this stress, I decided to take a day away from work, KNOWING that it wouldn't hurt me at all to do so.I went back to be instead of going into work. I woke up 7hrs later and started my normal routine as if I had worked. I check my phone after a bit and see that I got a message from a buddy at work.

    Turns out I pretty much lost my job for not going into work last night. I contact my HR about the situation and there isn't really anything I can do about it since I wasn't in the best position in the first place with my attendance due to my medical issue that I've been dealing with for the past year. Now all I can think about is why should I even go into work tonight to find out that my butt is just going to be turned around and walked out? I mean, the best I can do is just explain my action and deal with it.
    I know it's my fault overall and messing up on my job, but I don't get why my life was to be threatened by someone's inconsiderate actions. Am I the wrong one for defending myself and the other roommates?

  2. #2


    Not knowing the full situation and past history, all I can do is talk to you like a shop steward.

    Bit the bullet.
    Go in to work and talk to the super.
    If you did not call in and say you needed a time out, then that is a big thing.
    If you called in sick and they are mad then that is something else.

    Go in and talk to the supervisor with an open mind.
    IF there is an ongoing discipline for attendance issue then listen to them and ask for assistance and work on an action plan.
    If there is something more to it listen to them.
    If they give you the "ax" then move on and look at self improvement.

    As for the roommates if there is house rules they need to be followed. IF you are being physically threatened then you need to look at your safety first.

    Sorry that you are having these issues.
    I just hope this advice helps.


  3. #3


    I'm kinda with Egor on this one. I fully support your actions with the roomy, but it seems like you may not have been respecting your job properly, especially if you just don't turn up. I really do hope you can sort your job out....that would suck big time. Good luck.

  4. #4


    Egor's advice is really good. If you want to keep the job, then I think that is exactly what you should do.

    If you think your medical issues are causing problems at work, then you probably need to talk to HR to see if they can make any kinds of accommodations related to your medical issues. Facing your supervisor, though it may feel like the harder of the two options, is better for you and your career in the long run, because there are hard conversations that need to be had that come up from time to time.

    I tend to run away and avoid conflict, but that only causes more problems down the road. I'm learning that facing those issues earlier and confronting them works out much better in the long run than hiding does.

  5. #5


    My work place runs on a points system. It doesn't matter if you call in or not. I swear that I was within my points to take the night off, but it turns out there was a mistake on either my Supervisor's end, or my end. Do I really have to plead that I haven't been myself since I was threatened? I'm not really bummed out about the job. I'm torn by trusting someone with a simple rule, and then getting jumped (not physically, but on Facebook) because his pot head friends thought it was wrong for the first attempt at kicking him out. I mean, I got the threat 4 days after the correction. And to the point of being torn by this, my mental state is suffering. I know I did the right thing, but man I cannot even get my act back together.

  6. #6


    First, keep the job. And second, if your RM doesn't take out the trash or not cleaning up, disrespect privacy and rest time of others so there's only one solution: Fuck him out.

    Is very important to "fight for the job," but isn't less important as "teritorial defense."

  7. #7


    Talk to your boss and explain the situation, if some one threatened your life file a police report this will help if you choose to fight for your job and will alert the police to your threat.

  8. #8


    I'm jobless now. Thankfully I've been prepared for something like this for awhile. It's a bummer, but what else am I to say.

  9. #9



    I'm really sorry to hear that. The situation seems terrible from all aspects.

    And to the point of being torn by this, my mental state is suffering. I know I did the right thing, but man I cannot even get my act back together.
    Take care of yourself. Don't do *anything* to hurt yourself. If you need, get outside help, in whatever form that takes. If you feel like your safety is threatened, contact the police. If you feel like you are a threat to yourself, go to the hospital.

    You can make it through this.

    I hope I'm not coming across too strongly, but your comment made me worried for your wellbeing. Maybe you aren't that far down the path, but if you are, get help.

    I have severe depression and anxiety issues. I've been to the point where I was ready to hurt myself. Five years later, I'm glad I had somebody to help me through it. It may be a friend, partner, therapist, or doctor or whoever, but find somebody who can help you make it through this and not be alone.

    If nobody else is there, let us be there for you. You can do this. You really can. You can do hard things.

    Often I tell myself, "I can do this one more day." When I'm overwhelmed with anxiety, sometimes I tell myself, "I can do this one more hour. I can make it for an hour." Then I reevaluate and tell myself the same thing an hour later. I don't have to be able to see beyond the hour or beyond the day, but I can do this one more day. You can too.

    - - - Updated - - -

    Sorry if I overstepped there. I think I heard in your posts in this thread several things that would be severe anxiety triggers if they happened to me, which probably accounts for my strong response. Maybe they weren't triggers for you and you'll think I'm wacko over here, but I'd rather let you know you are awesome and worth loving, than miss a chance to help somebody who really needs it.

  10. #10


    DracoFox, I'm sorry you lost your job. I lost mine at the end of the year 2000. It was one of the worst experiences of my life as I had been at that job for 20 years. I was very depressed and had a time line, that if I didn't find something, I was going to commit suicide, but that didn't happen. I went back to school, a junior college were courses only cost about 129.00 plus books. I applied at many places. I picked up a part time church/choir directing job and did some substitute teaching. Eventually I got a job as a teacher assistant and a continuing job as a part time church music director. I'm retired now from the school job and I still work as a music director.

    My point is that things don't end, but begin anew. There is always hope and promise. Keep your cool and start the job search process. For me, it took to jobs to make up what I was making in one job, but both jobs were better, kinder and because of that, easier than the one full time job. They say when one door closes, another opens and I believe that. Take care of yourself. Eat regularly and get some sleep. Things will fall in line. Good luck.

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