Discovered by my parents!!

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Dashsanta

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Hey everyone!

So about 2 weeks ago I was away and my mom was cleaning out my room and stuff because it smelled.......she ended up going into my closet where she knocked over a bag and opened it to find my little stuff in it.

I ended up being questioned about it cause it wasn't just diapers in it and stuff, and I ended up coming out as abdl.

My parents were understanding and stuff and I told them it was only a faze that has been going on, I'm not mental and don't need a physiatrist or anything. They asked a couple of questions and stuff and seemed understanding!!!

However....a couple of nights later I was later confronted by my mom who then seemed a bit more worried, that I was involved in a wrong group of sex offenders and stuff plus, using diapers effect on social life,and other stuff

All and all I tried blowing it off but she was like 'I don't condone this behaviour in my house'....

Guilt got to me a couple of days later and I deleted a couple of social media accounts and threw out my 2 packs of diapers, and pacifiers that I had in my room

however after reflection I come to realize I don't want to quit this and I still want to do this...

I will be living at home for my first year of school before possibly moving out with friends however within less than a couple of weeks-2 months I'll be moving down into a new room in the basement!!

What should I do???

Brett
 
Wow no way same thing just happened to me too except I just told my mom,
Worst mistake now she telling me to get rid of it all! So I'll guess we will both see...
Wish u luck... :)
 
At the very least you should probably tone it down a little. You are still living with your parents so they choose the rules for the house. We do not know your parents so we can't say for sure what they will do but if you feel like toning it down isn't it option you can try talking to them again and giving them some links that explain what a ABDL is. If they go on and search it on the Internet they most likely will stumble upon some sites that will put you in bad light. I am in the exact opposite situation. My stepmom has seen my little clothes and stuff, diapers onesie footy pajamas and she has walked in on me wearing them. She doesn't say anything she just continues to talk to me like nothing is wrong. Never says a word about it. Happened on a lot of accasions. I pesronally have stopped caring if they are going to be this relaxed why should I stress about it. Anyways I believe there is an article somehwere called understanding infantilism that I heard was really good in explaining what this lifestyle is about.
 
So I did give them some links I knew were going to help..and it did

However I know my mom mentioned that when she did some other research she came across some other videos...the one of the guy on Dr. phil and this guy apparently apart of some ABDL 'family' where he was sexually assaulted......

My dad fully understands and is supportive of me...my mom is sort of?!
 
Yeah unfourtantly there are those videos and sites that give us a bad name. Remember though there are also "normal" people who do much worse. Your mom may need some time to get used to the idea. Try to give it time and don't try to push it to much or it could go south really fast. It is nice that you have at least one parent who is supporting.
 
Alright Here's a recommendation. I think you should mention that you became aware that this is not just a phase recently because no one has ever told you that before have they? At some point you're probably going to have to explain that this is a part of who and what you are and it's not going to stop even if you want or try to make it stop. Being a AB/DL is not a problem in and off itself. One just needs to work to prevent it from becoming a problem that's all. If you try to not to do that all that does is make the desire more powerful until you literally can't think of anything else which is harmful to you in multiple ways. Make sure you tell her that Baby Brett is not representative of AB's in general at all because he is only 1 person whom I can personally attest has changed a lot since that show. Media of any kind has to put things on the air in order to get ratings and most AB/DL's have no reason to put this on the air in the first place because of the outright intolerance of this. Trying to believe everything on TV is not a good idea about anything as far as education is concerned.

In fact I highly recommend that you just show your mom this particular post right here because it's going to be more accurate then Dr. Phil ever was actually. You're going to have to explain to her how unhealthy trying to make this go away really is because it will get of control for you both eventually. More importantly trying to get rid of this is likely going to only accomplish making you more prone to serious mental health issues down the line actually. The suicide rate among AB/DL's is suspected of being even higher then even the trans community I think according to Bittergrey whose site I will be setting a link to below actually Also be sure to ask your mom the question how does not telling anyone that I do this when I'm alone and no one see's it hurt anyone? I don't think this hurts you at all. Now as far as your social life well that just means you simply need to find someone who is tolerant anyways which will result in a healthier relationship in the long run actually. Why? Because intolerance just leads to a relationship that is toxic and unhealthy anyways last I checked.

http://aboutabdl.weebly.com/abdl-phobia-and-misconceptions-about-abdls.html
http://aboutabdl.weebly.com/information-for-parents-of-abdl-childrenteens.html


There are a huge number of links on this site here that has a lot of accurate data about AB/DL's on this link right here which is the Bittergrey has made: http://understanding.infantilism.org/
 
Dashsanta said:
So I did give them some links I knew were going to help..and it did

However I know my mom mentioned that when she did some other research she came across some other videos...the one of the guy on Dr. phil and this guy apparently apart of some ABDL 'family' where he was sexually assaulted......

My dad fully understands and is supportive of me...my mom is sort of?!

Just a fyi. I obviously missed this post above of course because well I was to exhausted at the time to notice that I was giving advice that was already given? It's good to know things are going well for you at least. Sorry about dropping the ball like that but at least no harm was done. :sweatdrop:
 
Well what you went through was a purge, where you felt guilty, not good. I think it is most important to make sure to avoid those, they always made me feel self loathing. It probably didn't help your case that you told your mom it was a phase, because it gives the wrong impression of it, but hindsight 20/20.

So you probably are best off trying to keep it as well hidden as you can from your mom, but remain prepared with some material if she discovers that you haven't quit. Make a safe document that clearly explains what it means to be an Adult baby to you and why it is important, and that, no, it isn't part of a sex offenders group (it's really quite insulting to believe that). Keep that letter to explain it, because if she finds you out again, you might be too afraid to explain it off the top of your head when she gets angry about it.

Make sure that you have a few easy to hide, small things available to take care of your little side when you really need to feel small. A pacifier is pretty easy to hide, but not easy to explain if it gets found. You will have to be careful with that, but it is an option. A stuffed animal is pretty innocent, and not horribly unusual, you can typically get away with that. If you have some baby diaper pins, you can hide them easily, and then make a make-shift diaper with a towel, at least to feel like you have some type of diaper on. If you do your own laundry, you could even get a few towels of your own and use them a little right before laundry day and then wash them out.

Anything that comes down to actually making a small stash of diapers is a risk, but might be necessary depending on how much you need in order to make a middle ground for yourself. You need to be able to feel like you can take care of the urges to be little, enough to feel like you accept yourself, but also be able to restrain so you don't go binge and buy a bunch of stuff that you have to throw away to hide it. If you have a car that your parents don't ever use or look in, you could hide some things in the back of the trunk.

Also, I would highly recommend visiting a psychologist at whatever school you go to (I did this and it was just really helpful to me). Not because you are psychotic for being AB, but because this kind of a situation can be very stressful, and if you have a nice liberal minded councilor, he/she could help really well in you being able to approach this situation as best as possible. A councilor would be able to discuss one on one with you on their impression of your parents, as you would describe them, and possibly give you a good idea on how to proceed. Psychologists through schools typically are subsidized and cost around $10 a visit. It likely is something that wouldn't last long, just because they will tell you that being AB/DL isn't really that big of a deal, but they will be able to help you figure out how you can last your time in your parents house without going crazy. Also, if your Mom finds out you haven't stopped, then you can say that you have visited with a psychologist, and they say that your AB thing is really non-threatening, and shouldn't matter to anybody else.

- - - Updated - - -

Dashsanta said:
So I did give them some links I knew were going to help..and it did

However I know my mom mentioned that when she did some other research she came across some other videos...the one of the guy on Dr. phil and this guy apparently apart of some ABDL 'family' where he was sexually assaulted......

My dad fully understands and is supportive of me...my mom is sort of?!

Ok, I never noticed this post, so my advice is really quite pointless.

Well, awesome that your dad is supportive, that is half the battle right there.

Remind them that Dr. Phil is meant to be a drama, and should not be observed as normal. It is his job to find the most fascinating outlandish stuff, and then talk really loud at people to create drama instead of spending time listening to each other.
 
Just remember that you do need to abide by the rules in your parents' house. As hard as it may be, maybe until you can get started on moving out on your own that you need to cut back on some of this. Unless you're a bedwetter or deal with an IC problem, you'll be fine until you get things put together for moving.
 
boobybird89 said:
Just remember that you do need to abide by the rules in your parents' house. As hard as it may be, maybe until you can get started on moving out on your own that you need to cut back on some of this. Unless you're a bedwetter or deal with an IC problem, you'll be fine until you get things put together for moving.

Well that can be true but in Dashsanta's case the parents are tolerant of this at least. So I think all Dashsanta needs to do is just be politely discreet about this to simply not disrespect the house that's all. It's not healthy to just ignore this side of oneself but yes the idea behind that is to prevent someone from being controlled by these desires rather then being in control. Dashsanta definitely should wear just enough to prevent this from going to his head because ignoring this side of himself is not healthy either. Especially since Dashsanta clearly has gone through a purge phase after all when he said he threw things out. Just don't go overkill or alternatively do this to little either on wearing diapers Dashsanta. Both paths can cause mental health problems down the road for you if you don't. That door does swing both ways after all.
 
Being discovered by your parents regarding a part of yourself that is "private/personal" is a difficult t hing. Living here in the family home as an adult with Autism and Cerebral Palsy, I never had "privacy", until after my parents passed-away. My Mom used to go through all my personal belongings all the time daily searching for dope, booze, and pornography right up until I was in my mid-30's in age. She treated me as if I were an evil rebellious teenager in adulthood.
 
flyinbaby said:
Wow no way same thing just happened to me too except I just told my mom,
Worst mistake now she telling me to get rid of it all! So I'll guess we will both see...
Wish u luck... :)

Same happened to me , now I've resorted to sneak in nappies and hide in undisclosed locations

- - - Updated - - -

Dashsanta said:
Hey everyone!

So about 2 weeks ago I was away and my mom was cleaning out my room and stuff because it smelled.......she ended up going into my closet where she knocked over a bag and opened it to find my little stuff in it.

I ended up being questioned about it cause it wasn't just diapers in it and stuff, and I ended up coming out as abdl.

My parents were understanding and stuff and I told them it was only a faze that has been going on, I'm not mental and don't need a physiatrist or anything. They asked a couple of questions and stuff and seemed understanding!!!

However....a couple of nights later I was later confronted by my mom who then seemed a bit more worried, that I was involved in a wrong group of sex offenders and stuff plus, using diapers effect on social life,and other stuff

All and all I tried blowing it off but she was like 'I don't condone this behaviour in my house'....

Guilt got to me a couple of days later and I deleted a couple of social media accounts and threw out my 2 packs of diapers, and pacifiers that I had in my room

however after reflection I come to realize I don't want to quit this and I still want to do this...

I will be living at home for my first year of school before possibly moving out with friends however within less than a couple of weeks-2 months I'll be moving down into a new room in the basement!!

What should I do???

Brett

I get that feeling sometimes , just tell yourself you've got nothing to be ashamed of and your not a sex offender or a paedophile. Your parents will understand , they just need time.
 
My mother found a wet diaper in my room one day late last year looking for laundry. We talked, I told her everything, and told me she didn't understand but it was ok as long as I kept it to myself.

Just assure her that it don't involve kids, its just personal to you and you will keep it private in your own room.

Some parents take it differently. You will just have to play it by ear, It is their house and their rules.
 
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