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Thread: Something pretty cool is happening

  1. #1

    Default Something pretty cool is happening

    In my ongoing battle over depression and anxiety, i have been reaching out more to family and phychologists for help. I had a surgery recently, and my mother was visiting to help my wife with our baby. While in the hospital, i had an order of custom cloth diapers arrive.
    When i was home, my mother and i agreed that they were rediculously bulky under my clothes, and she actually told me that she would take them back to Ohio and alter them for me, as long as i didnt tell my dad because it would wierd him out!
    I found this to be a profound way of my mother showing full acceptance of my lifelong attachment to diapers. We have spoken much of my struggles, but this was a level of support I did not expect.
    On a separate note, my middle sister, the last one in my family to find out about my diaper love (she learned about a year ago, but i did not know she knew) turned out to be the most supportive. In a moment of crisis, during a panic attack, i called her for help. I dont like to burden my mother, because these things weigh so heavily on her. My sister wrote such kind and supportive things, and had a surprise for me at the end: she found a box of vintage pampers at a garage sale and bought them for me as a momento!
    The point of all this is to say, i have been torturing myself for thirty years, assuming people would hate me for being me. And look what actually happens. So my question is this: are our worries really just nonsence? Why are we so prone to assume the opposite of what actually is? Why are we so crazy? And why do we assume people will hate us, dispite evidence against? I just cant figure myself out.

  2. #2

    Default



    Quote Originally Posted by Bambusa View Post
    In my ongoing battle over depression and anxiety, i have been reaching out more to family and phychologists for help. I had a surgery recently, and my mother was visiting to help my wife with our baby. While in the hospital, i had an order of custom cloth diapers arrive.
    When i was home, my mother and i agreed that they were rediculously bulky under my clothes, and she actually told me that she would take them back to Ohio and alter them for me, as long as i didnt tell my dad because it would wierd him out!
    I found this to be a profound way of my mother showing full acceptance of my lifelong attachment to diapers. We have spoken much of my struggles, but this was a level of support I did not expect.
    On a separate note, my middle sister, the last one in my family to find out about my diaper love (she learned about a year ago, but i did not know she knew) turned out to be the most supportive. In a moment of crisis, during a panic attack, i called her for help. I dont like to burden my mother, because these things weigh so heavily on her. My sister wrote such kind and supportive things, and had a surprise for me at the end: she found a box of vintage pampers at a garage sale and bought them for me as a momento!
    The point of all this is to say, i have been torturing myself for thirty years, assuming people would hate me for being me. And look what actually happens. So my question is this: are our worries really just nonsence? Why are we so prone to assume the opposite of what actually is? Why are we so crazy? And why do we assume people will hate us, dispite evidence against? I just cant figure myself out.
    I think you're right. In most cases, those around us who love us, accept us for who we are, and that includes the strange baggage. That's what love is all about. That said, you are lucky to have such a family. My wife accepts me in the same way. She's the only one in my family who knows, but I think my daughter would be as accepting. I think my sons would think it weird.

  3. #3

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    Quote Originally Posted by dogboy View Post
    I think you're right. In most cases, those around us who love us, accept us for who we are, and that includes the strange baggage. That's what love is all about. That said, you are lucky to have such a family. My wife accepts me in the same way. She's the only one in my family who knows, but I think my daughter would be as accepting. I think my sons would think it weird.
    The funny thing is, the person in my family whom has been the biggest surprise is the one that I waited to tell because i was sure that, even though she was the most likely person in the family to help when there is a problem, she would be too closed minded to accept this. I could not have been more wrong. She could have been a great ally had I not doubted her. So strange.

    People talk crap about how wierd these things are when it is someone they dont know. And that scares us. But when it is someone they care about, they have the exact Opposite reaction.

    One simply cannot in any case be certain of how someone will react. In my experience it has been those i worry about the most who end up surprising me!

  4. #4

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    Quote Originally Posted by Bambusa View Post
    So my question is this: are our worries really just nonsence? Why are we so prone to assume the opposite of what actually is? Why are we so crazy? And why do we assume people will hate us, dispite evidence against? I just cant figure myself out.
    I think it's just that when we were children, we were scolded for acting like someone younger than us and we were praised for "being a big girl/big boy". A lot of the times parents put such a presure on their children not to "behave like a baby" that they are embarrassed to ever do something that could make anyone think they are younger that they actually are. I think a great example is when older kids need to wear diapers. There is nothing wrong with it, but they refuse to do so, because it is so embarrassing to them.
    And this feeling of embarrassment stays with us for the rest of our lives. I don't really understand what the big deal is. Why can't kids just be kids? Why can't they develope at their own speed? There would be a lot less stress in our lives if we could just take our time.

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