Feeling Ugly

I just don't know, I always put myself down. I can never shake the feeling of others judging me harshly. I just at times hate how my face looks, what I wear. What I like. I can't ever be relaxed around others, never myself.

Hey Flutters, you know there's a whole lot of stuff going on here, and so much of it is just about learning to accept yourself and who you are. Yeah I know... Heard it before. Unfortunately, it's a tough road but it's one you can and must travel. Society is crap with all the unrealistic expectations it places on people but most of those are just false. The truth is other people are hardly ever judging us as hard as we judge ourselves. The happiest people are those who accept who they are and don't really give a crap what others think (now I'm not talking about being disrespectful here...) these people are mostly liked by others because they are confident in themselves. So yeah... big call, I'm still working on it myself, but at least I know it's worth pursuing.
Good luck and hey, love the dude in the mirror, he's ok :hugs:

i'm with you on the self-loathing: i've hated myself (for my looks, my size, for me and for what everybody else sees) since a pretty early age.
it's something you have to endure and work through (the whys and wherefores aplenty), but 'work' is good place to start; for, regardless of what any liberal nutters say, you are as you do. for all my flaws and for what everybody sees, i found and made place in my what i've done and do, and others see that.
your sense of self-worth comes directly from the worth that make for yourself. you'll find your place, it just time to find it and to figure out what others around you want from you.

Dude, I feel you. I've always been extremely self conscious, and my friends really don't help me feel better. In fact they're the ones that make me hate myself. There are so many things I didn't know were wrong with my physical appearance until my jerk friends pointed them out to me. Now they'll make fun of me for it every chance they get and just always put me down. They judge what I do, how I look and make me feel like it's not ok to be myself. They're complete and total a-holes but they're the only friends I have (and I'm very introverted and horrible at making new friends) so I keep coming back. Over the last few years, there have been times when I refused to look in the mirror because I absolutely hated the thing I saw looking back at me. Sorry to ramble on about myself, but I guess what I'm trying to say is I understand.

If there's one good thing that's come from all this, it's that I learned how to not care what other people think. Their opinions are worthless, and their words mean nothing. The only person who has the right to judge you is YOU. So screw everyone else. Be who you are.

Hey Qman.....just as soon as you get the chance, you drop those a-holes... It's such a bad vibe to keep hanging with pricks that down you all the time. Also, I know it can be hard to make new friendships sometimes, but ask yourself what your getting from these people....is it really worth it. Don't sell yourself out for social convenience. You're worth too much.

Flutters I was the same way in High School (Fluttershy FTW <3) but learned that we are all good looking in our own way. Don't be afraid to strut it, the body is a beautiful thing.

I'm very similar, to be honest the main way I cope with my extreme hypersentitivity is just to try and distract myself with doing other things. Because when I'm just sitting alone not doing anything my thoughts often turn to my appearance and I often start getting really upset and my mind fills with thoughts like "why does everyone have to look better than me" and "why can't I just look like everyone else" yeah so just distract yourself. Also maybe avoid mirrors a bit, for me looking in them too much makes me critique every aspect of my appearance.

Try to build up some self confidence. It's not easy, I know, but the way I did it was start wearing my lion hat (it looks incredibly childish) in public and for me that's almost an act of defiance against our social culture (especially since I'm a guy) and by giving others the impression that I'm happy with myself and I don't care about how I look to them, it kind of makes the feeling sink in and makes me feel it myself.

Flutters, I feel for you so don't get offended by anything I may say. We are all unique as we don't all look the same, it would be a hell if we all looked the same b e cause we would never know to whom we were speaking with when we want to socialize. You need to build our self steam and get the hell away from your (SO CALLED) friends, I would never hang around any one who constantly put me down. I see that you are 18, too young to be feeling this way, you need to join, say the YMCA or other group and meet new people and start over in your circle of friends. There are a lot of good folks out there about your age who will embrace you for who you are. QUOTE=Flutters;1309237]I just don't know, I always put myself down. I can never shake the feeling of others judging me harshly. I just at times hate how my face looks, what I wear. What I like. I can't ever be relaxed around others, never myself.[/QUOTE]

ozbub said:

Hey Qman.....just as soon as you get the chance, you drop those a-holes... It's such a bad vibe to keep hanging with pricks that down you all the time. Also, I know it can be hard to make new friendships sometimes, but ask yourself what your getting from these people....is it really worth it. Don't sell yourself out for social convenience. You're worth too much.

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Thanks man, it's a complicated situation. We've been friends for a really long time and it's like they're really nice and good to me when we're one on one but when we're together as a group I'm the one that gets ripped on constantly. I'm starting college in a few weeks so hopefully I can have a bit of a fresh start. Anyways, sorry to get off topic.