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Thread: Figuring out how to regress

  1. #1

    Default Figuring out how to regress

    So I've been practicing AB/DL stuff for a while now, but regression remains something of a riddle to me. I'm not sure I've ever really experienced it, but I have a strong desire to.

    My everyday state of mind is exceptionally difficult to shut down, and tends to be very hyper-aware and analytical. This is good sometimes, but it's fairly annoying when you just want to put aside your worries and cares. I also can be very self-conscious and harsh towards myself, and wearing diapers or otherwise trying to engage my little sometimes wakes up this negativity.

    What I want to do is just get to a point where I can be comfortable letting go of my adult responsibilities and thought patterns for a while and switch them out for simpler ones. I'm not quite sure how to do this... If I just, say, color or play with Hot Wheels for long enough, will I gradually just slip past the point of thinking too much about it into a state where it's natural? Is there anything people find helpful in practicing/easing into regression, and/or shutting down hyperawareness and negativity?

  2. #2


    Yes it's all about the scenario and the setting. It's hard for me to give up 100% at any given moment because there's so many factors that go into at least my regression. The biggest one is probably TRUST. Do I trust my mommy enough to give up 100%. I'l admit there's more or less a fear of no return, like I want to be able to trust my mommy enough that she can "snap me out of it" because I know I could commit myself to the point where I'd be totally in babyspace. I've gotten to that point maybe once entirely in my life and it wasn't even with a mommy in real life. I fell into babyspace over skype and the telephone so easily.

    I can remember what the feeling felt like and I more or less know how to get myself to that point. It's just about silencing your inner critic and trusting your mommy to freely give yourself up for regression.

  3. #3


    This is a door you have to commit to going through. It requires some practice to achieve. I guess for those of us that have been going there since we were little, it may be less confronting. But it still requires a serious sense of letting go and concentration on what you desire. Once you step across the threshold though, that becomes much easier to maintain. You need to have a strong sense of self belief, and as Noah says, a degree of trust. I think it's abit like meditating if you've ever done some ways you go into yourself in order to leave yourself.

  4. #4


    it's impossible to cross the threshold when you've got not mommy or daddy tho...there's no line of trust there so it's scary to regress on one's own.

  5. #5


    Quote Originally Posted by noahVmiller View Post
    it's impossible to cross the threshold when you've got not mommy or daddy tho...there's no line of trust there so it's scary to regress on one's own.
    I agree that it's easier but definitely not impossible. I was a long time without a just make do. Mind you, yes it is a bit scary and you need to feel pretty safe.

  6. #6


    The meditation comparison helps. Gonna work on silencing my mind and trusting myself to be able to go through that door... I'm more worried about dropping out of babyspace too easily than I am getting stuck there, at least at this point.

  7. #7


    For me to regress, there has to be an element of wetting or desperation involved. I can't just play, colour, or watch TV and drop into little state. But if I'm holding on wanting to pee, or if I've wet my pants a bit, I find I can regress a lot easier. I think that I align the thoughts of needing to pee but putting it off because I'm too distracted by what I'm doing, or facing the fact that I've had an accident because I was too distracted, a specific trigger to being little.

    My girlfriend likes to have little playtime and pee fun as well. She has some genuine IC issues, and often has minor accidents, and occasionally larger ones, and she agrees that it's something about the naughtiness of having wet her pants that makes her feel little again.

    We have different views on it at the same time though. She likes to be cared for, and have somebody to baby her and help her to change and comfort her when she wets herself. Her little side is around 3-5 years old, and she likes to be treated accordingly. While for me, my little is usually around 9-12, a much bigger kid who really shouldn't be having accidents in his pants. I'm not so much into being cared for, but I love having a playmate.

    The AB side of our relationship isn't the be all and end all of what we do together. We enjoy quite a normal vanilla side to our social and sexual lives as well. The AB stuff usually happens in two ways. Firstly as a planned event. We only see each other a few times a week, with Saturday being a "locked in" day. So sometimes we plan in advance that the upcoming Saturday will be a "little day," and we will plan accordingly, agreeing beforehand whose turn it is to do what.

    When it's her turn, I still enjoy doing her stuff. Basically it involves her being little and needing to be changed a few times when she wets. Probably showered and wearing her onesie afterwards. She just loves someone taking care of the situation and making her feel alright.

    For me, it's time to play outside, and will involve one or both of us having a wet accident after some desperation and holding. We also wear adult fitted briefs when we play, and pretend we are wearing pull ups or good nights. I wrote a thread a while back and told of how we wore to the shops once pretending to be 11 years old.

    The one thing we've learned is to be flexible and willing to suspend belief and reality. It doesn't always have to make sense!

    The other way that playtime happens is unplanned. She will occasionally have an unplanned IC accident, and it will result in some spontaneous playtime as I help her change.

    But for me wetting has to be involved somehow in order for me to truly regress.

  8. #8


    I should clarify trust as acceptance. It's hard for me to regress on my own because I have a very LOUD inner critic that will self judge and criticize. It's even hard for me the few times I've been with an accepting partner. I assume that over time it will get easier to silence this inner critic, but that's just my own case. My ABDL side is my biggest source of love and the source of some of my biggest scars so for me having someone else there to assure me, "allow me" basically give me permission to be yourself because that's ultimately what it comes down too. I've felt so judged my entire life so it's hard to silence that growing resistance to something that brings me so much unsurmountable joy.

  9. #9


    If you have comfort objects/places that you can be around it can help you with calming yourself down and getting into a 'regressed state'. For me it's my bedroom, with my favourite music playing and sitting on my bed wearing my big lion furry hat, and cuddling one of my stuffed animals

  10. #10


    GenericFox, what a great thread. I'll give a stab at it - the whole regression thing.

    For starters, it depends on what you mean by 'regression'. If you think it means 'literally' believing and feeling like you are a child - I have no idea how to do that. For me, regression means engaging in 'pretend play', and I make use of a skill almost all of us have. Something called 'suspension of disbelief'. If you have ever watched a fantasy/horror/SciFi movie and liked it, then you know how to 'suspend your disbelief'. In simplistic terms, even though you know that what you are seeing is not real and sometimes not even physically possible, your brain briefly ignores that reasoning, says 'let's just accept this as real and possible' and then you enjoy the movie.

    Now you just have to do that for yourself. The easiest way for me is to have a pretend conversation with my plushy tiger - Trevor. I might start out by telling him about my crappy day at work, but his answers are not an adult therapist's but instead, what a child might say and talk about. For example, after sympathizing with me, he might suggest it get out a coloring book and crayons, or suggest I relax with my pacifier. I then laugh at him and say "silly tiger, why didn't I think of that. Your my bestest friend." ...and on and on...

    Even though my adult mind knows Trevor is not real or talking to me, I can easily 'suspend my disbelief', as if I was watching a movie, and engage in that kind of mental play.

    And, believe it or not, IT WORKS! I actually enjoy it and feel happier. It helps to remember that 'real' children are not stupid. For the most part, children know when they are engaging in pretend play, that their characters and plushy animals aren't living things that actually talk to them. Yet, they do it and enjoy it greatly.

    Of course, like children, you need props/toys to help get into pretend play. Coloring books, crayons, legos, a sand box - all of these things help, in addition to the diapers, pacifiers and bottles. And don't forget a Plushy! He can become your Best Pretend friend in the world.

    Hope this helps. It's sad that adults have to re-learn how to play, sometimes, something that was so easy as a child. But, with practice you can do it.

    Just Play!

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