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Thread: Mountains out of molehills...

  1. #1

    Default Mountains out of molehills...

    Hey, me again. I'll just cut to the Chase. If I ramble I apologize, It honestly feels like just when things are going good or somewhat okay, I ruin it with some thought about the world depressing me, or my brother, and or family, or studies that my college degree won't go anywhere, and I'll be in McDonald's or as a janitor, or something like that, for the rest of my life, or the news and whatever dumb decision the government makes, or the biblical rapture, and what comes after, and to be honest, I'm not 100% what causes this but it all kinda bubbles to the surface, and I have a lot of excessive anger, BECAUSE THE WORLD IS FALLING APART AND I CAN'T DO ANYTHING TO STOP IT. Sorry I really had to get that all out, anyway it fells like, due to my past my subconscious feels I don't deserve to be happy, because I never really found myself in high school, my early life was a mess due to my mother and stepmother. Anyway it says that in the serenity prayer, for God to give me the serenity to accept the things we cannot change, the courage to change the things we can change, and to give me wisdom to know the difference, but what if we don't like the things we can't change, and the things you can change you don't really want to and those feels like I'm just holding back so much anger, and resentment towards my childhood, and that I literally have no hope, due to my fun distractions that I look at during class gradually taken away from me, and I just get so massively board, but I have to take the classes I do to graduate, and I want to but my life is getting less and less control and I really don't know what to do, and other then other distractions like the news, and (admittingly) this site, although mabie I take your advice too literally, or misunderstand it, I really don't know. And it feels like on a very short leash and all I really wanted to do was move out when I reached 18, but that's gone, also I hear millennials are supposed to be brave and feel they can do anything, not me. And my grandma things it's a good thing that adult kids are moving back with their parents, NOT ME! Because I wanted to be on my own by 18. And I really can't stand that I'm almost 22, and still living with my grandma, and my brother, when I thought life would be completely different, and I literally don't like it. Sorry for ranting I just didn't know where to post this, and I can't really get over all of this, because I thought by now life would be different, or something like that. Also my grandma says one step at a time, but I want to rush, and do all of them at once, anyway I am at my last 2 semesters, which I have been in for 2 times, and I really want to graduate by next summer, and I want to get back to my lifestyle, but I fear I will sabotage it due to the aforementioned, and I don't know what to do.

  2. #2

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    Hi KittyninjW.

    As I read this I hear a lot of what I said back then. I stuck to it and persevered. However, that did not accomplish anything except postpone the problems until later and they where much harder to deal with.

    So here is what I should have done.

    Look at getting some professional help.
    Look at anger management classes ( they help and are not totally what you would think. IT gives some of the basic coping mechanisms)
    Look into any thing that might help you find coping mechanisms to address the felling's that you have.

    I hope this helps.

  3. #3

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    It sounds to me like you're having the classical anxiety attack. I get those on occasion. Sometimes they happen as I'm trying to fall asleep. They've changed for me as I've gotten older. When I was your age, I was afraid I wouldn't get the job I wanted. I wasn't sure if I'd be a dad or have a family. The reasons change as our circumstances change, but they're there just the same. You can do two things. The first is to weather the storm and the second is to keep working toward your goals and have faith in yourself.

    During school, make a schedule so you can budget your time. Attend your classes, take good notes, concentrate on what is being said and to some extent, enjoy the class. When you're home, study hard and quiz yourself. Things will fall into place.

  4. #4

  5. #5

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    I feel you may be having some difficult thoughts lately. Is there something more pleasant to think about? Or perhaps other ways to consider the situations? Looking at life in the most negative way possible can be very unhealthy. Try looking for another perspective.



    Quote Originally Posted by KittyninjaW View Post
    It honestly feels like just when things are going good or somewhat okay, I ruin it with some thought about the world depressing me, or my brother, and or family, or studies that my college degree won't go anywhere, and I'll be in McDonald's or as a janitor, or something like that,...
    I feel it is good you see yourself ruining a good mood with negative thoughts. The other step is dismissing the bad thought and moving on to brighter topics. When this became impossible for me and I could not sleep because of it, I sought professional help. Through them, I learned may things to help me control my thoughts such as how to move my mind to better topics. One method is to question how likely a negative thought actually is of being real. Will your degree go anywhere? Having the degree makes you qualified for higher paying positions. You can apply for many jobs which require any 4 year degree. The degree opens opportunities! The study merely shows work is difficult to find in your specific chosen field of study. Many people have difficult in their chosen field anyway for one reason or another and enter another field. Who cares? You may always go back and get a Masters degree later in another field.



    Quote Originally Posted by KittyninjaW View Post
    ...Anyway it says that in the serenity prayer, for God to give me the serenity to accept the things we cannot change, the courage to change the things we can change, and to give me wisdom to know the difference, but what if we don't like the things we can't change, and the things you can change you don't really want to...
    Good question. You ask for the "serenity" or calmness, tranquility, peace to accept those things because they cannot be changed. Continuing to be upset over those things is messing up your mind and making you angry. You are asking for peace there; only you may change; they cannot. The serenity prayer is commonly used in addiction and abuse situations to bring mental peace. Change is expected and courage is required. If it is fine as it is, leave it alone! However, changing important things like how you commonly think about things will take courage.



    Quote Originally Posted by KittyninjaW View Post
    ...also I hear millennials are supposed to be brave and feel they can do anything, not me.
    Milennials have that stereotype. Who cares if you aren't? No one requires it of you. No one expects it of you. Be who you are and like yourself.



    Quote Originally Posted by KittyninjaW View Post
    And my grandma things it's a good thing that adult kids are moving back with their parents, NOT ME! Because I wanted to be on my own by 18. And I really can't stand that I'm almost 22, and still living with my grandma, and my brother, when I thought life would be completely different, and I literally don't like it...
    There are pluses and minuses both ways. Of course it not what you thought or planned or like. You want to be on your own, independent. The nice thing is your living cost is lower, you are not getting as much college debt, and you will be able to afford nicer things earlier than if went another route. Keep your eye on the goal. Now is just temporary.



    Quote Originally Posted by KittyninjaW View Post
    ...I want to get back to my lifestyle, but I fear I will sabotage it due to the aforementioned, and I don't know what to do.
    Yes, I would be eager to get back to my lifestyle also. Focus on your goal, how far you have come, how far to go, and what needs to be done to get there. Take it one step at a time; one day at a time. Stay away from negative thoughts which slow you down. Let us know if you have any further trouble or questions. Expect some more bumps on the way. Best of luck.

  6. #6

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    I think your trying to take the hole pie, it would be better to take just little pieces of the pie.
    anyway I think your trying to take on to much at once, I think you should try and make a list of what is the most imported thing you have to do, and the thing you need to do, want to and so on down the list. I think you will find thing will tend to work out with having so much stress in your life.

    and as for jobs you don't have to work at MacDonald you can always consider working the trades. the pay well.

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