Page 1 of 2 12 LastLast
Results 1 to 10 of 15

Thread: I'm supposed to be the older brother...

  1. #1

    Unhappy I'm supposed to be the older brother...

    Hey, it's me again. I'm just thinking, as you know I live with my grandmother and my younger brother, whose a massive jerk and has a hair trigger, anyway what you don't know is that I was in a bad situation beforehand, with my mother, when I was younger, (not getting into details, for obvious reasons.) and my stepmother, and my brother was the first to get out of that and into my grandmother, which was good but I stayed behind for about a while longer, until I came out of it. (Again, not going to specifics, for obvious reasons.) Anyway, because of that, I admittedly looked up to him, even though I'm the older brother of the two, because he was always braver and stronger than me, and I'm supposed to be the braver and stronger one, the one my younger brother looks up to, and not feel like the little brother when I'm not, the fact is this, I'm not as brave as I want to be, I'm as skinny as a rail, and I'm a total pacifist, plus I care way too much, and that's why I feel I sabotage myself because I'm not where I want to be, I feel like stairs sometimes, and I rather go to my room, where I can be save, were my diapers, and/or act like a baby girl, a cat, or a dog, or a combination depending on the day, and/or play video games, and draw and run away from it all, The only time I am brave is when he's not here, and when I try when he's here, I fail, except when my grandmother helps me, but still I really am not brave and I'm supposed to be the braver, older brother, out of the two, and I'm not and it's sading to me.

  2. #2

    Default

    Sounds a lot like me when I was younger, except I had nobody to look up to. Just because your the oldest doesn't mean you have to be the bravest and decently built. I'm the oldest in my family, sensitive and care too much and skinny but I don't let it bother me. It's just the things that make me unique, it's just a matter of accepting it.

  3. #3

    Default

    Thanks for that, it is hard for me, considering everything, but I will try.

  4. #4

    Default

    I kinda understand the feeling you're describing a little, as my younger sister was always the functional oldest. Always the one left in charge, always the one given the most responsibility.. and always just kinda the take charge kid of the group. Although I didn't want to e that person, there is that sort of expectation when you were born first that you should.

    You are amazing just the way you are though!

  5. #5

    Default

    Yea hey don't let's this get us down i know what your going through.
    Don't try and be someone your not. As shake sphere put it,
    "To be or not to be that is the question"
    Meaning be your self

  6. #6

    Default



    Quote Originally Posted by gigglemuffinz View Post
    I kinda understand the feeling you're describing a little, as my younger sister was always the functional oldest. Always the one left in charge, always the one given the most responsibility.. and always just kinda the take charge kid of the group. Although I didn't want to e that person, there is that sort of expectation when you were born first that you should.

    You are amazing just the way you are though!


    Quote Originally Posted by flyinbaby View Post
    Yea hey don't let's this get us down i know what your going through.
    Don't try and be someone your not. As shake sphere put it,
    "To be or not to be that is the question"
    Meaning be your self
    Thanks for that, I really appreciate it, I'm doing better today, but it's still hard though.

  7. #7

    Default



    Quote Originally Posted by KittyninjaW View Post
    Thanks for that, I really appreciate it, I'm doing better today, but it's still hard though.
    Just remember that, whatever else you think, you're supposed to be you. You can try to improve yourself, to be a stronger person, more reliable or proactive. But don't try to be someone that you're not.

  8. #8

    Default

    Why do you say you have to be the braver of you two?

    Our roles are what we make of them and nothing more. Expectation and our own thoughts about ourselves are just that: thoughts. They don't really mean anything in the grand scheme of things, so why let it bother you?

    Who's to say that looking up at someone you think has done well is right or wrong? Who's to say that you should be something, and not something else? Who's to say that you are good as you are or not?

    If the answer to these questions is yourself, then you have the capability to change yourself, and should work to that end... BUT, if the answers to the above are the expectations of someone else, and nothing more, then you should not worry about it as much; gain some confidence in yourself if you are happy with the way you are. (And I don't mean in an apathetic way where you are fine with where you are only because you believe you can't change yourself.)

    We are all unique, so of course others will do better than us in one way or another. But we can't let that distract us from what we find to be the truly important things in life.

  9. #9

    Default

    Its kind of funny this whole age / responsibility perception thing. Because I have a fairly serious public persona, people who don't know me intimately think I'm the super organised responsible one, but actually it's an elaborate charade to cover my huge insecurities. Nearly always I feel younger than my peers even if they see me differently. I have a younger brother also that I think of as being the grown up. Haha weird huh. It's even more strange if I'm in a regressive mood. The bottom line I guess Is that this is so much in our own heads.

  10. #10

    Default



    Quote Originally Posted by ozbub View Post
    Its kind of funny this whole age / responsibility perception thing. Because I have a fairly serious public persona, people who don't know me intimately think I'm the super organised responsible one, but actually it's an elaborate charade to cover my huge insecurities. Nearly always I feel younger than my peers even if they see me differently. I have a younger brother also that I think of as being the grown up. Haha weird huh. It's even more strange if I'm in a regressive mood. The bottom line I guess Is that this is so much in our own heads.


    Quote Originally Posted by thingywhat View Post
    Why do you say you have to be the braver of you two?

    Our roles are what we make of them and nothing more. Expectation and our own thoughts about ourselves are just that: thoughts. They don't really mean anything in the grand scheme of things, so why let it bother you?

    Who's to say that looking up at someone you think has done well is right or wrong? Who's to say that you should be something, and not something else? Who's to say that you are good as you are or not?

    If the answer to these questions is yourself, then you have the capability to change yourself, and should work to that end... BUT, if the answers to the above are the expectations of someone else, and nothing more, then you should not worry about it as much; gain some confidence in yourself if you are happy with the way you are. (And I don't mean in an apathetic way where you are fine with where you are only because you believe you can't change yourself.)

    We are all unique, so of course others will do better than us in one way or another. But we can't let that distract us from what we find to be the truly important things in life.
    Thanks for that. To be honest, I really like reading your comments and hearing what you have to say, still, your right Osbub, and thingywhat. I should just try to be me. Which I feel I'm getting better in that regard, but I feel there's a conflict between my little and adult half, while I'm trying to work with them both, and to learn how to live with both, and it causes a conflict, because for some strange reason my inner critic still feels somewhat ashamed, of it even after all of this, and saten still pesters me, but I feel yesterday I made good strides to accept it, still it's hard for me, because my sissy/LG/catboy/ furry fantasy is such a contrast, and I can't seem to accept it, I mean it's hard but I'm trying and I don't know what I'm doing wrong.

Similar Threads

  1. I am supposed to introduce myself so here; itis brief
    By EKB4 in forum Greetings / Introductions
    Replies: 2
    Last Post: 03-Apr-2012, 06:27
  2. Replies: 26
    Last Post: 02-Sep-2008, 17:51

Tags for this Thread

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •  
ADISC.org - the Adult Baby / Diaper Lover / Incontinence Support Community.
ADISC.org is designed to be viewed in Firefox, with a resolution of at least 1280 x 1024.