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Thread: Opinions from an outside, possible unbiased source...

  1. #1

    Default Opinions from an outside, possible unbiased source...

    Ok, long story, so please bear with me if you wish. Recently, our regular, full-time babysitter, (we have 4 kids and my wife and I both work full time) moved back over-seas. The timeline worked out that just as she was moving over-seas, my co-worker, (at the time, now ex-coworker) had just split with his girl. She is a mother of 3, 22 years, no education beyond high school, and has a 1 month old baby. Anyway, we thought we talk to her about watching our 4-year old for a few hours per day until I got home from work. Extra cash, (under the table of course) for her, cheap babysitting for us, win-win, right? She's all for it. Month and a half into this, her ex, (my ex-coworker), starts giving me shit for supposedly telling his ex stuff about him he didn't want her to know. Like, WTF? I was kinda friends with this guy, but, not friends-friends... So, anyway, he's now going around our city, telling people that I'm a Two-faced f**k, and spreading all kinds of lies about me, because his ex is babysitting our children; and doing a damn good job of it I might add... Anyway, I'm a pretty laid-back kinda guy, but this ass is really pushing my buttons, any advice on how to handle him? I'm concerned he's gonna go to the cops and make up some bullshit just to drag my name through the mud, so to speak...

  2. #2

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    That title was supposed to say UN-BIASED, not in-biased... For some reason I can't edit it...

  3. #3

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    Quote Originally Posted by Nick1982 View Post
    That title was supposed to say UN-BIASED, not in-biased... For some reason I can't edit it...
    I don't think there's much you can do about it unless you get a lawyer, or perhaps a cease and desist order. Perhaps your lawyer could send him a letter telling him to either stop or you'll sue for defamation of character.

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    What dogboy said. The authorities can't do much for slander, but an attorney can. The initial consultation is free.

    If you haven't already, you can confront him personally with a friend by your side as a witness. Ask him what's up and why the lies?

  5. #5

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    Quote Originally Posted by dogboy View Post
    I don't think there's much you can do about it unless you get a lawyer, or perhaps a cease and desist order. Perhaps your lawyer could send him a letter telling him to either stop or you'll sue for defamation of character.
    Can he sue? Yes but probably not successfully. Talking shit about a person itself usually isn't illegal unless you can quantify damages: you didn't get hired for a job, lost your housing, something of that nature. Read, money. That said, a C&D from a lawyer with thinly veiled threats might do the trick. Doesn't matter whether or not he'd win in court unless winning in court is a necessary part of the strategem, which in this case it isn't.

  6. #6

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    Ignore him.

    One important lesson I have learned in my life so far: Menial and situational conflict are exacerbated by prolonged involvement.

    The quicker you ignore this guy's behavior the quicker the absence of his antics. It sounds like he is experiencing a bout of jealousy and is quantifying it by rustling some feathers. If he is ignored long enough he will most likely lose interest. Remember, it takes a certain level of energy and time to discredit or shame someone. If the fuel isn't there then the fire will eventually die out. Plus, it doesn't take long to identify a quack as a quack.

    Don't get lost in the details.

  7. #7

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    They say, you can't fix stupid. I would ignore him, and hopefully he'll give up.

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    Thanks guys! Civil suits in Canada seem to rarely work out when you consider all the cost involved. Most people I've talked to locally about it are telling me that he would have a very hard time ruining my reputation, based on the fact that I've lived in this area my whole life, and I know a lot of people, and he only moved here from eastern Canada less than a year ago.

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