my current situation

Saix, try using a small booster - note that I said "small." Much of the absorbent capacity of large boosters may go unused (wasting money), plus they may swell up more than you would like. Try something with only an 8 to 12 ounce capacity. That way, all of the booster will be used and should give you at least an extra hour between diaper changes.

--John

Ok so today I saw the supplier and bought some continence aids
I bought a medium pack of lille supreme pullups which seem to hold up pretty well in regards to the urge incontinence (pack of 14 maxi)
I bought a pack of lille supreme fit tape on diapers which I have not tried yet (pack of 20 maxi)
I also recieved 2 caremmunity tape ons which I havent tried and cant really find much about online the website itself does not show them
so this should be enough for a while and hopefully they will all work decently
the pullups have taken a wetting each and did so without leaking both times
once again I continue to welcome any posts
of note I have also been experiencing urinary pain to an extreme degree the last 2 nights so I especially welcome support with that
regardless thanks in advance for any posts

Try doubling up with 2 diapers, make slits in the bottom diaper (the one next to your skin and put it on using the tapes. The out side diaper, put over the other one and tape. If you have any worries about leaks, get some plastic pants and put them over your diaper. I do putting plastic pants over my double diapers and so far no leaks and I can be out in public longer. Another solution would be to use Diaper doublers.

I hope this helps.

big update today I recieved the letter from the hospital letting me know my appointment is next month

I have a similar issue with having to go frequently and suddenly with both my bladder and bowel. Cleanliness is your biggest challenge. Buy desitin or some other rash creme now. Use it now. Waiting till you get a rash will be far worse than the expense of the creme. You also don't need much of it. If you can see a white film over the area you are probably overdoing it. Also, diapers over the shelf are meant to deal with basic leakage. A full wetting will leak. Once you start wearing go up in absorbency till you get to wherever you need to be. I suggest starting with Tena Maxi. They are thin if you buy the US version and odor control is nice but they absorb ALOT. Sitting position wetting will be an issue but I use plastic pants for that and never have issues with either odor or bulk. Tena Maxi in Australia may be the thicker APAC style but they're still usable. When I wen to Manila they were available on the shelf in most stores as Asians don;t seem to be as self-conscious of it as westerner cultures. Honestly I wore Abena M4's (one of the thickest) after I started to have nerve damage until it got dialed in and noone noticed unless they were scoping for it. Just get slightly looser fitting pants and longer shirts.