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Thread: finding a balance

  1. #1

    Default finding a balance

    So, I'll start off this thread by stating I'm very lucky, I'm engaged to a woman I can be open with, and I'm able to be diapered and cubby around her.

    But I'll be honest, this is new for me, and I'm scared that I'll become unbalanced. I enjoy the fact I can be little with her, but since I opened up I get my cubby urges more and more, but I'm able to control it, plus its best to not push it too much since she's new to having a babyfur mate, plus it makes it more enjoyable to have it as a rare treat. I'm not giving it up, and its not causing any problems, I'm just a bit worried (again its because its new and new scares me some times) so I'm trying to find a balance with it so I don't push my luck or make my mate uncomfortable and I can valance myself both as a cub and as an adult. I've got a little something going but maybe some advice can give me any ideas.

  2. #2


    The thing about is what you exactly just said "it's new" so it's going to become a nerve wreck until you get used to it. As time goes by, you will eventually feel more comfortable about the entire thing. Just don't rush and take things a bit slow so you get the most experience out of it all without feeling any kind of guilt. What you said again,

    "I'm not giving up" is a true statement alot of us usually say and its positive thinking right there! Just work out a few things and compare them with your mate and determine which ideas are perfect for a beginner's start! Here's some ideas.

    1. Cuddling: Everyone (almost) loves a good snuggle or cuddle so if you're remotely close with your mate, a good hug and cuddles bring out some good fuzzy emotions that perk everything up.
    2. Interests: You could always do some of the things she does as well and that way, your connection with her is almost on the top of the chart and it's always good to try new things (You might run into things you'll like and that'll really fix everything right up)

    When you're cubby, the only difference you'll be facing is the emotions and the attitude along with how you mix those two and act it out. There is nothing wrong with you if she feels comfortable around you. It's just that you're nervous and we have them moments where we might mess up and cause some hatred but have you asked her up front what will make her uncomfortable while you're little? That'll give you some ideas on what to avoid when you approach with this. All it takes is a little bit of practice, start out small and work your way up and things will go a long way.


  3. #3


    Very good advise from Snivy. I think because you are aware that there could be a problem, you will handle it well. We've often preached on this site, the merits of living a well balanced life. There is a time and place for everything, being little, cubbing, and giving your full attention to your partner and letting that person have their day. If you can do that, you have little to worry about.

  4. #4


    Well you know how intense it can be for me at times, Vallen, and that's without real life interaction. I agree with everything Snivy said, just take it slow and remember that your adult side comes first, that way your cub side will be less overwhelming and dominant. And you can always rest assured that your mate is comfortable with it, and that you have that opportunity.
    Last edited by Note; 06-Apr-2015 at 10:23.

  5. #5


    My mate and I are really close, so communication is open, and we do talk about this from time to time and agreed to take it slow with introducing my little side. She used to have a cub, and from time to time is a little fur herself. When I get cubby, sadly I get sleepy too because its always been something that I have to do at bed time where no one can see me.

    There's no lack of cuddling in our relationship :P that's for sure, we both like the comfort of physical contact, and even when I'm feeling my cubbiest, I still manage to put her first and give her the attention she needs and wants

    I also think I eliminated some of the uncomfortableness when I let her know she wouldn't have to worry about wet/messy diapers, because I don't use them I just wear diapers while cubby.

    Looking at everything I guess I do have decent moderation going, I just get scared sometimes, because I'm cubby ALOT when she's around but that's because she makes me happy, but I only act on those desires once in a while, and only when the day has gone nearly perfect because I don't want to risk bugging her.

  6. #6


    Well, brovfer, I am glad you can find a loving and caring mate. Some of us are never loving. I am so glad she accepts you for you, and is willing to participate to an extent. Though, I didn't know you never used them. Huh, I learn new things every day. But I am glad you're happy. And let her know maybe about your more frequent desires? I don't know her, or girls at all, so I wouldn't be able to judge a reaction to telling her you want to be cubby more. So, maybe don't take advice from me.

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