Chosen Lifestyle vs. Necessity

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CrinklesTheBunny

CrinklesTheBunny

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  1. Adult Baby
  2. Diaper Lover
  3. Babyfur
Ever since I was out of diapers, I wanted to get back in them. LOL. I have had a desire to be a baby again since my teen years. These urges were fueled by terrible childhood trauma due to rape, molestation, beatings, and severe neglect. Having ADHD, is another catalyst that helped fuel my deep seeded desires. Being babied seems to be one of the only things that can level me out when I'm having a flair up. It makes me feel such at peace and it brings such an amazing calm to my body, mind, and spirit. It's like every care I have melts away when I'm in my diaper, my onesie or foot jammies, and cuddling in a bed full of plushies. I can't help but to just feel at peace with everything. Having developed nocturnal enuresis over the past 10 years, given a choice by the doctor of like 4 options, I just opted to wear adult diapers.

My AB/DL lifestyle is sort of mixture of a chosen lifestyle and a necessity. And just like that, over the past week or so, I've started realizing in the same fashion the AB/DL thing can be sexual or non sexual for certain people too. I guess sometimes to understand things you have to look no further than your own backyard.
 
I think it's always worth celebrating the ability to understand each other better! I'm glad you have had an experience that's helped you! Thanks so much for sharing!
 
I've done a lot of thinking about some the more inflammatory remarks I've often made about other people's choices in the AB/DL world and let me tell you, I'm truly sorry. I have no right to talk down to people because they choose to be a sissy, because they choose to engage in sexual activity while diapered or babied, or they choose something maybe a bit more kinkier. It's our duty as ND job in life to uphold and encourage each other. Understanding is the key. And understanding comes with love for your fellow neighbor. I love all of you guys here on ADISC.
 
CrinklesTheBunny said:
I've done a lot of thinking about some the more inflammatory remarks I've often made about other people's choices in the AB/DL world and let me tell you, I'm truly sorry. I have no right to talk down to people because they choose to be a sissy, because they choose to engage in sexual activity while diapered or babied, or they choose something maybe a bit more kinkier. It's our duty as ND job in life to uphold and encourage each other. Understanding is the key. And understanding comes with love for your fellow neighbor. I love all of you guys here on ADISC.
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Sorry about the typos.
 
Glad to hear that feel that way Crinkles. Hopefully this also means you'll have an easier time dealing with moments when you accidentally run across sexual things you weren't looking for as well.

Thanks a ton for sharing your thoughts. I hope they catch on more broadly.
 
I hope so too ArchieRoni.
 
CrinklesTheBunny said:
I've done a lot of thinking about some the more inflammatory remarks I've often made about other people's choices in the AB/DL world and let me tell you, I'm truly sorry. I have no right to talk down to people because they choose to be a sissy, because they choose to engage in sexual activity while diapered or babied, or they choose something maybe a bit more kinkier. It's our duty as ND job in life to uphold and encourage each other. Understanding is the key. And understanding comes with love for your fellow neighbor. I love all of you guys here on ADISC.
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I appreciate the effort. We may not be the same but we're often the best chance for reaching someone else who can understand, maybe if only in part. I think it's worth mentioning that "choice" probably isn't the right word for most of us. Despite a lack of childhood trauma, I was attracted to diapers from an early age (3-4), and I would characterize the feelings as sexual from the vantage of adult experience. I didn't decide that diapers were sexy, this notion formed in my head somehow, in the same place that people usually find information on who they find attractive. Although some can decide to try ABDL as a kink, most of us are organically grown and have to learn to enjoy the ride. I am happy with it now, but I never would have consciously chosen it.
 
You know Trevor, I am trying to be an understanding person. But when someone tries to be picky with terms and tries to cause a bit of a scene because of words I used it sort of ticks me off.
 
Picky? No, but let's run with this. You were factually incorrect about how a group of people manage this aspect of their lives (myself included, I also didn't choose to be this way), Trevor politely threw in his 2 cents and you act like it's an affront, please.

As an aside, I don't accept your apology; you're kind of a jerk.
 
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MarcusBear, kindly go back and read the original post please. I never said anything about how a group of people view the AB/DL lifestyle. I explained my circumstances. That's all. My thoughts, my ideals of my own personal life, and my own dealings with being an AB is what I was trying to vocalize. I wasn't trying to force anyone to feel the way I do. I get a little miffed with Trevor because he was acting like I was vocalizing that as fact of the whole entire AD/DL community.

And to Trevor, I wasn't trying to say that other people like you have to accept my ideals of "choices vs. necessity". I was speaking of necessity and choice as it pertains to me. Not anyone else. I was merely voicing something from my personal experiences in life. It wasn't meant as a statement to say people fall in either of those categories. I even went as far to say what people do, I shouldn't judge and that I understand different degrees of the entire scope of things. I think you may have misinterpreted what I was trying to say.
 
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I am never prepared to hear the unbelievably disturbing stories about the screwed-up childhood's of some of our members. I am truly upset about Crinkles' back story. With an upbringing like that, anything to help cope seems reasonable.

It also makes me wonder what the basis of the diaper fetish is. My childhood was normal in comparison and I did not "choose" this. It is just me. Of course, I'm not too sure about calling it a necessity either. Deep urge maybe. Very deep.
 
CrinklesTheBunny said:
You know Trevor, I am trying to be an understanding person. But when someone tries to be picky with terms and tries to cause a bit of a scene because of words I used it sort of ticks me off.
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Trevor wasn't trying to be picky, they were simply expressing a misunderstanding that they were worried you still had. Everyone wants to be understood, you know? I think you just got a bit defensive. They were trying to express that for many people with sexual interests in diapers, it's still not a choice for them. That's all. (Something I probably would have mentioned myself, had I recognized that was a connection being made.)

I know that for you, it might have seemed like someone was taking your earnest attempt to be more understanding and sort of picking on the details, but that's not what the intention was. Trevor appreciated your attempt. He just wanted to make sure you weren't fostering another misunderstanding. Okay?

MarcusBear said:
Picky? No, but let's run with this. You were factually incorrect about how a group of people manage this aspect of their lives (myself included, I also didn't choose to be this way), Trevor politely threw in his 2 cents and you act like it's an affront, please.

As an aside, I don't accept your apology; you're kind of a jerk.
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You are perfectly in your right to dislike someone for their opinions, or for whatever reason you choose really. However can we please try to express our opinions without name calling?
 
Perhaps not a choice but a necessity to choose to respond sensitively to very personal needs....all very individualised. Go self-acceptance...the first step to being accepted and loved by others. :)
 
CrinklesTheBunny said:
You know Trevor, I am trying to be an understanding person. But when someone tries to be picky with terms and tries to cause a bit of a scene because of words I used it sort of ticks me off.
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You seem to have me confused with someone looking for an argument. I'm sorry if it came across that way to you. I didn't post that to make a scene or make you look like an idiot or berate you. From where I sit, this isn't pickiness at all, as it's an important point and one which I was concerned you might be missing. If you're trying to be understanding, it's important to know what you're being understanding of. That my urges are no more based in choice than yours seems like something relevant. That it's the norm within our tiny community also seems relevant to me. Words matter. They're all we have to foster understanding in the forum environment.

gigglemuffinz said:
Trevor wasn't trying to be picky, they were simply expressing a misunderstanding that they were worried you still had. Everyone wants to be understood, you know? I think you just got a bit defensive. They were trying to express that for many people with sexual interests in diapers, it's still not a choice for them. That's all. (Something I probably would have mentioned myself, had I recognized that was a connection being made.)

I know that for you, it might have seemed like someone was taking your earnest attempt to be more understanding and sort of picking on the details, but that's not what the intention was. Trevor appreciated your attempt. He just wanted to make sure you weren't fostering another misunderstanding. Okay? [snipped]
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Thanks. This was precisely my intent in my first post.
 
For me, I think having an outlet for stress is a necessity, but ABDL is the outlet I've chosen. Don't get me wrong, it's not like I've suddenly decided 'Oh, I'll get involved in ABDL', but I've also explored other (less successful) methods of stress-calming along the way, such as heavy drinking and reclusiveness. I feel like delving into these tendencies I have to feel little and be treated as a little has worked for me as a coping mechanism which is free from the mental and physical health issues of other strategies I'd tried.
 
Trevor you have to understand where I was coming from too. The subject matter was strictly from my point of view and my upbringing. I was comparing a necessity and choice for my own personal life. I don't have a single clue about everyone else's reasoning for being an AB or DL. I was purely saying that it was combination of choice, because let's face it, I had a choice whether or not to engage in AB activities. But the necessity from trauma I had and having nocturnal enuresis spawned more of a need. Thry culminated together to create my reasoning for being an Adult Baby. That post was purely from my life's perspective. Not anyone else's.
 
CrinklesTheBunny said:
Trevor you have to understand where I was coming from too. The subject matter was strictly from my point of view and my upbringing. I was comparing a necessity and choice for my own personal life. I don't have a single clue about everyone else's reasoning for being an AB or DL. I was purely saying that it was combination of choice, because let's face it, I had a choice whether or not to engage in AB activities. But the necessity from trauma I had and having nocturnal enuresis spawned more of a need. Thry culminated together to create my reasoning for being an Adult Baby. That post was purely from my life's perspective. Not anyone else's.
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I can understand where you're coming from. I didn't intend to disregard your initial post but I doubt I would have had anything to contribute if that was all you had to say on the matter. I read it, took in on board, and moved along to the next post. It's not that it was bad or worthless, it just didn't inspire me to interact. It was post #3 that prompted me to respond, in that your phrasing seemed to indicate a misunderstanding of what commonly drives folks in the community (myself included). If it was a genuine misunderstanding, it was possible that clarifying it might ease some of your conflicts.

If all you have to contribute to this forum is strictly your own experience, that's still worth something. However, I think we're better served when we make the effort to understand what drives others and learn from their experiences. Compare the activity in threads where people just give their experiences on a topic one after the other with no quoting or cross talk vs. the threads where discussion happens. It can be messy sometimes but there's a better chance for learning and understanding in there.
 
Like Trevor said, I didn't find diapers: diapers found me. I'd wanted to wear them almost from the time I stopped wearing them as a child. I've worked myself into knots trying to figure out why, but there came a point where I had to acknowledge, "I just do."

However. I also have OCD--real, diagnosed OCD, not what popular culture seems to think it is--and last fall, under my doctor's supervision, stopped taking medication. The resulting side effects were hellish. About a week later, seemingly out of the blue, I felt an incredibly powerful urge to be diapered. It was probably the most intense compulsion to be diapered I've ever experienced; it was like, "I need to be diapered right now and I don't care about anything else." Was this physical necessity? Obviously not. Was it psychological necessity? I don't know if it was necessary, but it certainly felt like it was. Ultimately, diapers helped blunt the side effects of medication withdrawal. Since then I've been wearing a lot more often than ever before; I find that when I'm wearing my anxiety practically disappears, and while it's debatable whether this is entirely good or not it's undeniably real. I've been wearing almost non-stop for the past week. I didn't wear at all the three weeks prior, and my OCD waxed and waned accordingly. Since I've been back--since I've been diapered--it's been non-existent. This fascinates me.
 
hti24 said:
Like Trevor said, I didn't find diapers: diapers found me. I'd wanted to wear them almost from the time I stopped wearing them as a child. I've worked myself into knots trying to figure out why, but there came a point where I had to acknowledge, "I just do."

However. I also have OCD--real, diagnosed OCD, not what popular culture seems to think it is--and last fall, under my doctor's supervision, stopped taking medication. The resulting side effects were hellish. About a week later, seemingly out of the blue, I felt an incredibly powerful urge to be diapered. It was probably the most intense compulsion to be diapered I've ever experienced; it was like, "I need to be diapered right now and I don't care about anything else." Was this physical necessity? Obviously not. Was it psychological necessity? I don't know if it was necessary, but it certainly felt like it was. Ultimately, diapers helped blunt the side effects of medication withdrawal. Since then I've been wearing a lot more often than ever before; I find that when I'm wearing my anxiety practically disappears, and while it's debatable whether this is entirely good or not it's undeniably real. I've been wearing almost non-stop for the past week. I didn't wear at all the three weeks prior, and my OCD waxed and waned accordingly. Since I've been back--since I've been diapered--it's been non-existent. This fascinates me.
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That's pretty interesting. I recall hearing David Sedaris talk about his OCD in his adolescence and how smoking helped him get it under control. It isn't something I know much about but it seems like some compulsions might be less troublesome in life than others. I hope you can continue to find some way of making it all work.
 
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