I have been married to my wife for almost 11 years, but have been ABDL for pretty much my whole life. I'm a diaper lover only and love to wear as a fetish and have no desires to act or to be treated as a baby. I know the best thing would have been to tell my wife as we were dating, but I seriously believed I could quit diapers cold turkey. It worked for a couple of years, but the desire came back strong and I started wearing in secret. I even found some diaper buddies that I could hang out with while being diapered. Well, every time I wear, I feel guilty like I'm hiding this huge secret (because I am) from my wife and it kills me. I have planned to tell her many times throughout our marriage but chicken out right before I get the words out. I can tell you right now that my wife is very vanilla in the bedroom and seriously has no kinks...or at least none she admits to. Even our sex positions are missionary only and she doesn't want to explore anything else. I'm afraid that she will flip out and want to take the kids and leave me or, less severely, look at me as less of a man from that day forward and no longer be attracted to me. Also, I believe she might be upset over me keeping such a big secret for so long.
All that to ask this. Is there any point in a marriage or relationship where you should just say "screw it" and decide to always keep it a secret? Have I passed that point? Has anybody else told their spouse late into their marriage? How did it go? I want to hear negative and positive reactions. And also I would appreciate some suggestions on how to do it.
Thanks in advance.