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Thread: Confused about me

  1. #1

    Question Confused about me

    Right now im feeling a bit confused. Here's whats going on.

    Last week a friend asked me if i could help her search up some dresses. because she was having trouble finding the ones she wanted. i was nervous because im a dude that will be searching up girl clothes, but i helped anyway since i like to help out.

    While i was searching, it felt weird searching the dresses at first, but after a while. it didnt feel so weird anymore. and seeing the type of dresses i liked the way they looked. as you know i tried on girl clothes before, but these were different then what i tried before.

    I know for a fact that im a dude, and im not transgender. however i do like to feel like a sissy sometimes which is why i tried on girl clothes before. and this is getting me confused. does this mean that im a girl? or what?

    Please help me figure this out.

  2. #2


    Hellllllllo, santa22!

    First off, when you get married, you will get used to buying girl stuff in your life because women want this or that but rather send you out to do it, probably because they are busy or something but they are women ^^

    No, your not a girl if you fell fond of women's clothings nor did you transformer into a girl or a sissy. Girl things can be pretty and become awe inspiring to stare at, some of us guys wish those kinds of dresses were on our Girlfriends or wives so it's totally natural if you liked some dresses. There is usually small incidents of men curious to know what kind of clothes women wear or exactly how they fit or comfortable are they? It's a natural thing to me and for a few others but of course it's usually the opposite on let's say a pretty dress you wish your future wife would wear for you in bed.

    If your claiming your a sissy then have you gone to any other realms? Have you RP'd as a girl or do you do this kind of thing almost everyday? Here's article you should read upon when you get the chance as this will help explain the LG/sissy identity.

    Maybe for your case, you fell in love with the clothing and had some images run through your head which is totally fine, it's not like your turning into a female or a teacher or nothing out of the sort. All I can say for you situation is maybe (like I said) just thought the stuff was cute and you wanted to keep looking for more just like when you scroll a browser for some cute puppies or kittens. The mind is truly a powerful thing and a terrible thing to waste but it can harness some pretty interesting power when it comes to the internet or outside world.

  3. #3


    Quote Originally Posted by santa22 View Post

    I know for a fact that im a dude, and im not transgender. however i do like to feel like a sissy sometimes which is why i tried on girl clothes before. and this is getting me confused. does this mean that im a girl? or what?
    I don't normally go straightforward with this but you kind of said exactly the answer to your own question. I bolded it for you.

    You just have sissy tendencies or like some girl clothes. That's all it is. If you know who you are inside, then don't let things like an interest in clothes change that. A girl doesn't become a boy simply by deciding that the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles are totally rad, nor does she become one in mid-belch.

  4. #4


    Quote Originally Posted by santa22 View Post
    I know for a fact that im a dude, and im not transgender.

    Quote Originally Posted by santa22 View Post
    does this mean that im a girl? or what?
    These 2 things contradict each other. XD

    The answer is pretty much no though. It does not make you a girl.

  5. #5


    People who are sissies are not necessarily transgender. Some people do it for humiliation, some people do it for added innocence or new/different experiences when little (adult baby mode). The vast majority of men who wear women's clothes for sexual excitement are heterosexual and not gender queer or gender confused. Since you said yourself you don't feel transgender, then you're almost certainly not.

    It's okay to enjoy wearing women's clothes. Do whatever floats your boat, man. Long as it hurts nobody it's cool.

  6. #6


    The only way to find out who it what you are is to experiment and find out what you like.

    From what you said the answer is a resounding no.

    Being a sissy isn't just looking at girl clothes and thinking they're cute. It's more about dressing up and role playing as a girl so if you want to know then throw on a dress and try to be a girl. If it feels good then you might be a sissy but if it doesn't then you're not.

    Also you don't need other people's validation to be who you are and it seems from past posts and chats that you are overly concerned about the opinions and validation of others.

    You will never figure out who you are by asking someone else "is this me." you can only figure out who you are from finding validation within yourself.

    So far I'm not seeing sissy. I'm seeing a boy who thought that a dress might be cute and that's normal.

  7. #7



    I understand your situation. I really do.

    This is my first ever post here on ADISC where I have admitted that I may have an understanding about being a sissy or finding my feminine side. I share the following from deep reflection and personal experience.

    I am mostly a very masculine male on the outside and if you saw me you would not question my masculinity. I often have a very rugged appearance. I am a true cowboy and work with livestock, wear a cowboy hat, and live a lifestyle of being a cowboy, not just wearing cowboy clothes. I ride horses, work outside, get dirty, sweaty, and I am the iconic version of the American cowboy. I am a damn hard worker and love working hard. I also working out at the gym and enjoy building the "guy" image.

    However, I too sometimes have found a softer (more feminine) side of my nature. And I am not just talking about being a little. Yes, even the concept of being a little or being a "padded cowboy" seems an antonym for the masculine side of my nature. But it is there, none-the-less.

    What you have shared about trying on girl's clothes or having some attraction to them, I do not believe means that you are a transgender or a girl. As with myself, there is an attraction to the softer side of things such as is often thought of being feminine. But for me, that does not take away the fact that I am very much a man and most commonly would be thought of as such.

    ...Think about this for a moment. You are a male. That means you have both an X and an Y chromosome. Females are XX. If you recognize that the X chromosome is associated with females and Y as in male, then you have to acknowledge that males do have a component of the female X chromosome as well as the Y chromosome which is considered male.

    I am not trying to engage in a deep philosophical or medical discussion, but the fact is that you have both a feminine and masculine chromosome within you. If you are honest with yourself, you will find that there is a place for both. Being attracted to pretty dresses doesn't necessarily make you a girl, but it seems normal that there is a part of you that may be attracted to this. After all, part of your genetic makeup has to be with the female X chromosome.

    I do not identify myself as being a sissy, but doggone it, I am confessing here and now that there is a part of this damn rugged cowboy that (on occasion) likes things that are frilly, satin, and pretty.

    I challenge any male to be truly honest with themselves after a deep reflection and ask themselves if there is not some part deep within that can relate. My own belief is that most males run from this and build a fortress around those thoughts that is cannot be penetrated. As such, they would respond with a resounding, not just no, but HELL NO! As society and culture suggests this is not the norm. But if you go back through history, you find that actually much of the dress and adornment that is now considered feminine used to be worn by males. From skirts, to lace, to wigs, to long stockings, and powdered faces that was all original male attire. Hmm. Who would have thought?

    So, this is something that I admit here for the first time is a part of who I am. Does that make me a sissy? Well, because it is not who I usually am, I would say no, I am not. But is there part of me that can sometimes associate with this, then the answer is yes!

    Does it mean that there is a part of me that is more in tune to the X chromosome within me? Well, yes, probably so. But I am still a male and I am not ashamed that I have identified this other part of who I am.

    I hope this can help you somewhat. As I said to begin with, I understand the struggle you may be going through, but rest assured, you are not abnormal at all. Rather, I believe you are recognizing what so many males in this world hide away from, which is the fact they are XY (female/male) and not YY (male/male). To my knowledge, there has never been a single instance of a person only possessing the Y chromosome without at least one X.

    The important thing here is to accept who you are and not be concerned with what others may be thinking.

    You are you! That is a great thing! Do not worry about what others may think, but try to understand what makes you who you are and accept that. When you can get to that point of understanding, you will find that being in touch with this part of yourself makes you a better person overall!

    TeddyBear Cowboy

  8. #8


    I can relate, I felt much the same way for a long time and not sure if im 100% sure of what gender i play. My best advice is to be you, it doesn't seem to matter what gender you play as in society as long as you you feel good doing it. If your struggling to figure out what you are or not sure if your completely one sided maybe your not. I don't think there is a real way to find out. I only recently embraced my girly side although most of my life i could relate to women more than men. I can only give as good of advice as someone who has only completer 22% of their journey. As i am 22 y/o.

  9. #9


    Quote Originally Posted by TeddyBearCowboy View Post

    ...Think about this for a moment. You are a male. That means you have both an X and an Y chromosome. Females are XX. If you recognize that the X chromosome is associated with females and Y as in male, then you have to acknowledge that males do have a component of the female X chromosome as well as the Y chromosome which is considered male.

    TeddyBear Cowboy
    I know you come from a well meaning place and I really do love your overall point, but I do disagree with this whole.. "chromosomes mean it's okay to be a sissy" argument that part of the meat of your post. I think it's important to point out as you pointed out yourself that it's society that's hold us that women like dresses, and not the X chromosome. So nothing about possessing an X chromosome naturally makes a woman drawn to the color pink or something. In fact as is harped on a lot, pink used to be a masculine color. So the argument that a man has one and will therefore naturally be so as well is a bit off base to me. The thing is that chromosomes really don't have a lot of natural personality things to them.. children are mostly just influenced by society that has outdated roles for people suited for a more primal age but not no longer fitting.

    To me it's as simple as people are not broad caricatures who should be expected to fit in people's boxes. People are complex, with a multitude of desires that only don't match up because society says they don't. I like princesses and super heroes, and these things don't aren't opposites and match up just fine. (In fact I'm a princess super hero, darn it!) Just like loving a fancy tuxedo and a beautiful dress isn't opposite or strange either. We only feel like it is because we as humans decided lots of silly things like this. You touched on this yourself, so I can't help but feel mentioning chromosomes at all was a bit off base. It just seemed a bit out of place to me. Still really well meaning all the same. I know.

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