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Thread: My desire to wear diapers is gone

  1. #1

    Default My desire to wear diapers is gone

    Hey, haven't been here for awhile and probably won't be on much more but I wanted to post this here. I am what I would call, a former Diaper Lover. I had a desire for wearing diapers since.....well, ever since I can remember. Now I have done the whole purge thing so I know that this isn't it. I honestly have lost my desire for the whole diaper thing.

    As a kid in high school, I searched and prayed for my desire to disappear but it never did. I got married, my wife knew about it, but didn't participate. I wore occasionally and always wanted diapers. Then about August of last year, I just didn't feel like it anymore. Didn't have the need or desire. I didn't care one way or the other. I mean, sure, if my wife asked me to wear a diaper right now, I would but it wouldn't mean anywhere near the same as it would've. I just have no need for it or real desire. To me, it would be just like if she asked me to shave my legs. I would do it for her but it does nothing for me.

    Now, what changed? I'm not sure. I have noticed I focus more on my other sexual desire more, bondage, but even that isn't as strong as my diaper fetish once was. So I don't know what changed.

    I just know that I hoped that someday it would disappear but everyone said it would never happen. That its a part of you and it always would be. All I am saying is, if you want it to be gone, it is possible. I don't know how except for saying, I prayed and worked at pleasing my wife and soon it just disappeared.

    Just a disclaimer: By no means do I think you shouldn't accept being an ABDL. In fact, I had recently come to terms with it and finally quit wishing it away, all I wanted was peace and acceptance and instead of my wife just accepting it, those desires disappeared which gave me that peace and acceptance from my wife. Being an ABDL isn't bad or something you should "cure" or get rid of but if you honestly want to let that part of your life go, it is possible and don't let anyone tell you otherwise. Biggest and best thing you can do is accept yourself for who you are and you can do whatever you want.

    I am happy with how things worked for me. I don't want to have a diaper fetish. Sure, I enjoyed it and if I still had it, I would accept it but if I had my choice (I said my choice, not anyone else's), I would not have the fetish. It fits me much better being this way and I just want to let anyone who is like me know, there is hope at moving past this if you want.

    If you want to ask me about it go ahead and post here or else pm me and I will try and check in every once in awhile to see if I can help. And again, I am by no means against the ABDL lifestyle, it just didn't fit me and I'm very happy I have moved past that. This isn't an argument about me moving on either. I know what the whole purge feeling is and this isn't it. I can guarantee it. This isn't to offend anyone, just to help those who really want to let go and give them hope and maybe, just maybe, I can help someone who does truly want to move on.

  2. #2

    Default



    Quote Originally Posted by MotoX View Post
    Hey, haven't been here for awhile and probably won't be on much more but I wanted to post this here. I am what I would call, a former Diaper Lover. I had a desire for wearing diapers since.....well, ever since I can remember. Now I have done the whole purge thing so I know that this isn't it. I honestly have lost my desire for the whole diaper thing.

    As a kid in high school, I searched and prayed for my desire to disappear but it never did. I got married, my wife knew about it, but didn't participate. I wore occasionally and always wanted diapers. Then about August of last year, I just didn't feel like it anymore. Didn't have the need or desire. I didn't care one way or the other. I mean, sure, if my wife asked me to wear a diaper right now, I would but it wouldn't mean anywhere near the same as it would've. I just have no need for it or real desire. To me, it would be just like if she asked me to shave my legs. I would do it for her but it does nothing for me.

    Now, what changed? I'm not sure. I have noticed I focus more on my other sexual desire more, bondage, but even that isn't as strong as my diaper fetish once was. So I don't know what changed.

    I just know that I hoped that someday it would disappear but everyone said it would never happen. That its a part of you and it always would be. All I am saying is, if you want it to be gone, it is possible. I don't know how except for saying, I prayed and worked at pleasing my wife and soon it just disappeared.

    Just a disclaimer: By no means do I think you shouldn't accept being an ABDL. In fact, I had recently come to terms with it and finally quit wishing it away, all I wanted was peace and acceptance and instead of my wife just accepting it, those desires disappeared which gave me that peace and acceptance from my wife. Being an ABDL isn't bad or something you should "cure" or get rid of but if you honestly want to let that part of your life go, it is possible and don't let anyone tell you otherwise. Biggest and best thing you can do is accept yourself for who you are and you can do whatever you want.

    I am happy with how things worked for me. I don't want to have a diaper fetish. Sure, I enjoyed it and if I still had it, I would accept it but if I had my choice (I said my choice, not anyone else's), I would not have the fetish. It fits me much better being this way and I just want to let anyone who is like me know, there is hope at moving past this if you want.

    If you want to ask me about it go ahead and post here or else pm me and I will try and check in every once in awhile to see if I can help. And again, I am by no means against the ABDL lifestyle, it just didn't fit me and I'm very happy I have moved past that. This isn't an argument about me moving on either. I know what the whole purge feeling is and this isn't it. I can guarantee it. This isn't to offend anyone, just to help those who really want to let go and give them hope and maybe, just maybe, I can help someone who does truly want to move on.
    It's not gone. You're 24. If you were 78, and had been diaper free for 60+ years then I'd say it was gone. Right now I'd just say it's taken a back burner. Believe me these desires don't just 'go away'. No matter how hard you pray, or to what God you pray too. It doesn't just disappear, it's literally hardwired into your sex drive.

    And you know what else? If it really did 'go away', why did you feel the need to come back here and validate that it was gone? I'm serious. I'm extremely confused on why you came here to tell us that you 'beat' being an AB/DL.

    I don't mean to come across condescending or rude, but I just am baffled at this post.
    Last edited by SnowBlitz; 19-Jan-2015 at 21:52. Reason: Wording and adding something else.

  3. #3

    Default

    Sort of agree with SnowBlitz. You're 24, dude. After reading your response I was expecting your age to say something past 45, but ... you're 24. I myself have gone through years of not even thinking about diapers. It happened between the age of 9-13 and again from 18 to about 22. But it never, ever goes away completely. You've got plenty of distractions at this point - establishing a home life with a caring wife and probably lots more to keep you busy and your mind off it. But I guarantee you it'll be back when your transitioning ends and things settle/slow down

  4. #4

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    1) You are at a young age so there's no way you will lose interest just like that, while it disappeared, it will come back sooner or later...I've read threads here that people kicked AB out of their lives but it swam back to them like geese. It's something you can't get rid off unless you become older and older, then you start to lose interest slightly...until it grows more and more till you are sick of it and then just maybe, that's no longer a thing. Diapers are powerful so they are definitely going to stick with you. Do they fade away? Sometimes, Permanently? Nope.

    2) Your sentence,

    "I am happy with how things worked for me. I don't want to have a diaper fetish. Sure, I enjoyed it and if I still had it, I would accept it but if I had my choice (I said my choice, not anyone else's), I would not have the fetish. "

    If your happy, that's fine, no one here is going to make you back into a DL again, it's just going to fade away and come back at a random time. You could be eating at a restaurant and ask the waitress what you want for dinner and out of nowhere you could say this,

    "Can I have the Pork Loin stake and could I get some DIAPERS with that- Oh sh*t..."

    Probably not this dramatic but you see my point I hope

    3) There was a user here called "Reword" who shared his experience about kicking ABDL out of his life and he keeps claiming he succeeded and he said it came back but is trying to encourage us how to kick it out of our lives, don't do what this dude did because the majority of us love our true selves, others here loathe it but the others love about it because it helps us calm in realms we could never reach, helped us with our jobs, helped out in relationships, etc. The only bad thing about it is if you live with family and they found out and are not understanding, I made a thread about it here if you wish to learn more about it: http://www.adisc.org/forum/showthrea...28#post1260228

    You are at an easy start so why don't you give it time before you truly decide on what you did and how you did it. This could take months or even years before your 100% sure it's gone because it could show up tomorrow or show up within 25 years from now.

    TL;DR it never goes away 100%, wait awhile before you absolutely know it's gone.
    Last edited by Snivy; 20-Jan-2015 at 12:16. Reason: Removed first sentence

  5. #5

    Default

    Not meaning to discourage you or anything, but I've gotta pile on with everyone else.

    Sexual interests and fetishes are rarely constant. It's possible you've completely and permanently lost interest in this, but I'd bet money it'll come back. Personally the diaper thing is largely on and off with me, not because I have any real problem with it, but because I find myself getting more into pure bondage or other fetishes (from my arm length list).

  6. #6

    Default

    As others have said, it's only only on the back burner for now. You've never specified how long "a while" is. I'm not trying to put you on a pedestal for you being wrong (I'm not saying you are) . People have gone years without wearing to have urges return. Are you suppressing signs or urges and dismissing them with disgust? Have you not have one thought about diapers?

    Also don't take this the wrong way, but don't say you've been cured. For us, it's almost like being gay... You just don't have urges anymore, you're not going to just forget. You're going through phases of guilt, purges, and denial.

    Back to what others have said, come back in a few years and say that your desires are have never returned without suppression and denial.

    I also wish you can succeed. I hope everything works out for you. I encourage you to give us updates on your professional.

  7. #7

    Default



    Quote Originally Posted by MotoX View Post
    Hey, haven't been here for awhile and probably won't be on much more but I wanted to post this here. I am what I would call, a former Diaper Lover. I had a desire for wearing diapers since.....well, ever since I can remember. Now I have done the whole purge thing so I know that this isn't it. I honestly have lost my desire for the whole diaper thing.

    As a kid in high school, I searched and prayed for my desire to disappear but it never did. I got married, my wife knew about it, but didn't participate. I wore occasionally and always wanted diapers. Then about August of last year, I just didn't feel like it anymore. Didn't have the need or desire. I didn't care one way or the other. I mean, sure, if my wife asked me to wear a diaper right now, I would but it wouldn't mean anywhere near the same as it would've. I just have no need for it or real desire. To me, it would be just like if she asked me to shave my legs. I would do it for her but it does nothing for me.

    Now, what changed? I'm not sure. I have noticed I focus more on my other sexual desire more, bondage, but even that isn't as strong as my diaper fetish once was. So I don't know what changed.

    I just know that I hoped that someday it would disappear but everyone said it would never happen. That its a part of you and it always would be. All I am saying is, if you want it to be gone, it is possible. I don't know how except for saying, I prayed and worked at pleasing my wife and soon it just disappeared.

    Just a disclaimer: By no means do I think you shouldn't accept being an ABDL. In fact, I had recently come to terms with it and finally quit wishing it away, all I wanted was peace and acceptance and instead of my wife just accepting it, those desires disappeared which gave me that peace and acceptance from my wife. Being an ABDL isn't bad or something you should "cure" or get rid of but if you honestly want to let that part of your life go, it is possible and don't let anyone tell you otherwise. Biggest and best thing you can do is accept yourself for who you are and you can do whatever you want.

    I am happy with how things worked for me. I don't want to have a diaper fetish. Sure, I enjoyed it and if I still had it, I would accept it but if I had my choice (I said my choice, not anyone else's), I would not have the fetish. It fits me much better being this way and I just want to let anyone who is like me know, there is hope at moving past this if you want.

    If you want to ask me about it go ahead and post here or else pm me and I will try and check in every once in awhile to see if I can help. And again, I am by no means against the ABDL lifestyle, it just didn't fit me and I'm very happy I have moved past that. This isn't an argument about me moving on either. I know what the whole purge feeling is and this isn't it. I can guarantee it. This isn't to offend anyone, just to help those who really want to let go and give them hope and maybe, just maybe, I can help someone who does truly want to move on.
    I've experienced something very similar, as I've written about previously. I think it was stress of going back to university combined with suddenly feeling old. There was a lot that went into it, actually, and I don't think I can tell it with the same clarity now that I did then. I'd ask you to go have a look at my contemporary writings. I suspect you might find something within with which you identify.

    Here I am almost three years on from when that all started. I am only now feeling mostly back to something like my ol' self vis-a-vis ABDL desires. Something I've come to realize, something a wise person told me back then when I was writing with similar concerns as you do now, is that life happens. Life gets in the way. Life comes up on us, tackles us, and gives us a noogie. Life occasionally overwhelms us. My hypothesis at the time was that, "When I get right to it, I actually have a lot on my proverbial plate right now, and on several levels at that. I now find myself wondering if my present lack of ABDL desires is some sort of internal defense mechanism, that my psyche is shutting down "non-essential" components/systems to make resources available for me to address the more pressing (and adult) challenges in my life. Maybe for me, instead of needing diapers and ABDL stuff to cope, it's the exact opposite, that ABDL desires are actually a drain or distraction during stressful times."

    And I believe that more now than I did then. I think that we as humans have desires that are not likely to completely vanish. Sometimes, things get in the way. Sometimes, things overwhelm us and we need to attend to them. Sometimes, we just don't have enough in us to indulge all of our desires, let alone attend to our normal affairs.

    And that's ok. I think people get too hung up on trying to get away from things. I'm glad it's working out for you now, but I suspect that in time, you'll be in a different place in life and some of those old interests might come back. Never say never, as it were.

    At any rate, I think you're largely holding out false hope if you advise people can lose it forever.

  8. #8

    Default

    When I was a young father, most of my desires went away. I was focused on so many things, mostly job and family. The feelings eventually came back, but I do entertain the idea that some may lose the desires. Who's to say. I think the important thing here is that you are happy and comfortable however you feel.

  9. #9

    Default

    Sometimes AB/DL comes and goes for some people. It has nothing to do with a binge and purge cycle, some people are really like that where they lose interest in it and then it comes back so they are into it again. It also seems common in parents who are AB/DL after they have a baby and they lose their desires for a while and then it comes back.

  10. #10

    Default

    I'm a big fan of the "distraction theory of habit-kicking" that others have described. In other words, we temporarily stop doing a thing because we're busy doing or thinking about another thing. Without meaning to, I took a months-long break from my DL side early in my freshman year of college. Why? Well, it might have had something to do with living away from home, making new friends, meeting a girl, being introduced to sex (that was probably a biggie!), etc. Once things settled down a bit, old habits, hobbies, and all sorts of things started popping back up -- including the pursuit of diaperness, for better or worse.

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