How would you explain being little to someone outside the community?

I think the reason reason people tell others is for acceptance. People others outside of the AB/DL world because they want to accepted. Not even the closest people to me know that I'm an AB. Why? Because I am not going to put myself through the possibility of losing friends or it ruining my reputation that I have. I trust my friends to JewelSparkles, but something like that is n I t really something thry need to know. You know, it's not necessary for a person to tell the I r friends about every single little aspect of their life. I'm very comfortable and happy being an AB. But I am also in the pull eye all the time. Could you imagine what would happen if my AB lifestyle was to be revealed to everyone? I have some very very close friends that I talk to that don't even know about my AB lifestyle.

And think your idea of your friends "deserving" is novel and great for you JewelSparkles. But really when it comes down to it, it's really not a matter of them deserving to know as much as you wanting them to know.

If I feel like I want someone to know, they are probably close enough to me to understand the majority of the real me. I am pretty openly myself, minus the babyish things. I don't even try to hide my affinity for cartoons and stuffed animals and coloring books. I just have always been this way for as long as I can remember. It's easier and I think better to just be open. I don't really worry about hiding my plushies and things because I can never remember a time that they weren't strewn all over my bed. As for the diapers and things, I just don't see it necessary to tell people that aren't going to be in super-close-kinda-intimate situations with me. It's a bit like people going through your underwear or important papers or something else personal. If I'm in a relationship with someone where that's ok, they probably know. If I'm not and they are messing with that stuff, they certainly didn't have my permission and they don't have any reason to know. It isn't necessarily that I even don't trust someone. It's just kind of a policy that I don't tell people things like that simply because it isn't something people need to know.

As far as actually telling someone if an appropriate situation ever arises, my best advice is to just be honest! Say what it is that you feel, and tell them that it is because it's important to you and that they are also important to you that you want they to know. Then make sure to leave room for questions and comments. As long as you are straightforward, you should get your point across. Afterwards, I think it's best just to go back to business as usual unless the other person brings it up again.

That's about all I really know. I hope your future endeavors go well.

CrinklesTheBunny said:

I think the reason reason people tell others is for acceptance. People others outside of the AB/DL world because they want to accepted. Not even the closest people to me know that I'm an AB. Why? Because I am not going to put myself through the possibility of losing friends or it ruining my reputation that I have. I trust my friends to JewelSparkles, but something like that is n I t really something thry need to know. You know, it's not necessary for a person to tell the I r friends about every single little aspect of their life. I'm very comfortable and happy being an AB. But I am also in the pull eye all the time. Could you imagine what would happen if my AB lifestyle was to be revealed to everyone? I have some very very close friends that I talk to that don't even know about my AB lifestyle.

And think your idea of your friends "deserving" is novel and great for you JewelSparkles. But really when it comes down to it, it's really not a matter of them deserving to know as much as you wanting them to know.

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I don't agree with this POV at all but whatever works for you.

I would just rather tell people I trust about all of myself than live a lie in hiding. Telling them helped me get a rid of a huge mental block. Felt like I was being completely dishonest.

And they understand.

It's not living a lie if there's certain aspects of your life you choose not to disclose.

Except that in my case, I was hiding something away that was important to me. And why would I want to keep doing that. It was mental anguish.

Those were your thoughts. But from the point of view looking outward, it was more an acceptance thing. Living a lie would be having these AB feelings and fighting them and trying suppress them. Telling others about your lifestyle is more of an acceptance thing. Maybe you were mentally having a hard time accepting who you were. You needed support from friends outside of the AB lifestyle to help you cope. And there's nothing wrong with that at all.

Depends on who's interested. If it was just someone with a speck of curiosity, I'd tell them it's nothing more than a guilty pleasure. If it was someone who was deeply interested, I'd tell them it's more than that and start explaining a thing or two, and whether or not they stay attentive for it determines how far I go.

ClandestineWing said:

Depends on who's interested.

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i agree, unless You're struggling with self acceptance, in which case, the "disinterested" friends with whom You confide are likely to conclude that it is something that is affecting You in a negative way, and will likely discourage Your interest on that basis ?

It's like taking drugs.....but your not actually taking drugs, while still getting the same effect. Especially the relaxation part.

quartz200420012 said:

It's like taking drugs.....but your not actually taking drugs, while still getting the same effect. Especially the relaxation part.

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Except for the tripping.