I know we see a lot of these posts frequently around here, but this time around I could really use some advice.
For the first time in my life I finally feel true conditional love. You see, I outed myself as a DL to my parents before I even knew anything about ABDL (amazing what you can find on the internet). Since then I never felt complete acceaptance with this looming over my head. Don't get me wrong I love my parents, we have a fantastic relationship but it's just one of those things I wish I could have taken back as a kid and kept to myself.
Currently I'm engaged to an amazing girl who has aceapted me as an ABDL and even went as far to allow me to call her Mommy. I couldn't be more thrilled. She plays along and we have formed a bond unlike anything I've ever felt before.
Here's the dilemma...I am going to admit I'm a coward. For some reason I can't bring myself to openly talk to her about a sissy lifestyle. I've spilled the beans about the diaper chastity, breastfeeding, babytalk etc but I'm terrified to even dance around the topic of becoming a sissy. This is something I've never discussed with anyone before, and I'm afraid by even broaching the subject it could be the straw that broke the camels back.
I thought maybe if she found out through a third party like my tumblr, pinterest, or ADISC profile that maybe it would provide some sort of common ground to openly talk about the subject. However, sometimes I doubt she ever checks these sites. She's told me point blank before she never logs onto them so this could all just be wasted effort.
What do you all think I should do? Should I continue to open up here online, and hope maybe she puts the pieces together and it sparks a discussion? Or should I just bite the bullet and bring it up in conversation?
Should I just repress any of those thoughts and feelings and keep them to myself all together? Helllllllllllllllllllllp :/