Page 1 of 2 12 LastLast
Results 1 to 10 of 13

Thread: Christmas: a love/hate relationship

  1. #1

    Default Christmas: a love/hate relationship

    Well I'd just like to share a thought or two about feelings at this time of year, and wonder how others are coping.

    For most of the year I manage to cope pretty well with balancing my little self ... Sure there are times when little me demands more attention than usual, but at Christmas.... boy it's tough to contain my 'little' excitement.

    Actually, I'm surprised I don't give myself away in public haha. Shopping is murder... I just about feel like I'm gonna tear in half...I literally feel like I am constantly having to restrain the over enthusiastic toddler I'm taking with me everywhere. This absolutely sucks and leaves me feeling quite frustrated and sad.

    I know that I can't just gravitate to all the little kid stuff, but it seems at this time of year it is absolutely everywhere I turn.

    When I'm shopping with my partner, I am usually holding her hand, and although I desperately want to touch everything, I genuinely feel like that toddler that's being towed around by his mom, you know the one

    I actually find myself sulking as I look enviously at little kids just soaking up all the magic this season has to offer.

    I know there's no answer really except to totally give in to it....which isn't an option, I guess I just have to be grateful for whatever awesome moments come my way.

    What really hurts is that I'm finally in a position to have what ever I want, and yet I know that I can't, because well, it's not ?-&(:#@ right is it.......try explaining that to the poor little bub in my head....he just feels like he's being deprived.

    Enough emo talk, I really do like Christmas, and I can get away with some childish silliness so I'll enjoy what I can.

    Oh.... So this is not a blog, do you get this way around the holidays, and if so, how do you cope?

  2. #2

    Default

    I can sympathize with that, probably the reason why I have come to detest Christmas so much these past few years. I used to have all of that wonder, joy and amazement that most had when they were younger, but now it all just feels like an obstacle. What's worse, is that the same feelings have carried over to every public holiday for me, including birthdays (shudders). I guess with getting older you start to realize what it all means, that it's all just another cash cow to exploit the working man and the consumer market. Kinda sad when you think about it.

    Anyway, I will enjoy the extra company, food and enjoyment I see from others, but it's just another celebration I cannot fully appreciate myself anymore.

  3. #3

    Default

    Being DL, I don't really identify with a little self. But I can see your difficulties on display by Mrs. Maxx now that we have a one year old granddaughter. Toys, clothes, she's going totally overboard. The daughter-in-law asked me (privately..) the other day "Where's her off button?"

    We have teenage grandsons via our daughter, but this is the first girl, and Maxx Juniors first. I suppose her excitement is understandable, although I mostly end up with their somewhat jealous 50lb dog in my lap seeking equal time and attention.

    As for me enjoying Christmas, I'm well over the commercial hoopla. My favorite part is a long solo walk through town at zero dark thirty, enjoying the peace, quiet and christmas lights.

  4. #4

    Default



    Quote Originally Posted by ozbub View Post
    Well I'd just like to share a thought or two about feelings at this time of year, and wonder how others are coping.

    For most of the year I manage to cope pretty well with balancing my little self ... Sure there are times when little me demands more attention than usual, but at Christmas.... boy it's tough to contain my 'little' excitement.

    Actually, I'm surprised I don't give myself away in public haha. Shopping is murder... I just about feel like I'm gonna tear in half...I literally feel like I am constantly having to restrain the over enthusiastic toddler I'm taking with me everywhere. This absolutely sucks and leaves me feeling quite frustrated and sad.

    I know that I can't just gravitate to all the little kid stuff, but it seems at this time of year it is absolutely everywhere I turn.

    When I'm shopping with my partner, I am usually holding her hand, and although I desperately want to touch everything, I genuinely feel like that toddler that's being towed around by his mom, you know the one

    I actually find myself sulking as I look enviously at little kids just soaking up all the magic this season has to offer.

    I know there's no answer really except to totally give in to it....which isn't an option, I guess I just have to be grateful for whatever awesome moments come my way.

    What really hurts is that I'm finally in a position to have what ever I want, and yet I know that I can't, because well, it's not ?-&(:#@ right is it.......try explaining that to the poor little bub in my head....he just feels like he's being deprived.

    Enough emo talk, I really do like Christmas, and I can get away with some childish silliness so I'll enjoy what I can.

    Oh.... So this is not a blog, do you get this way around the holidays, and if so, how do you cope?
    For me the love/hate is more in my pocketbook! xD My biggest issue is actually that I really really stress over getting the "right" gift for everyone, and that's not anything to do with my AB-side. Honestly for my AB-side this is the best time of year with one exception. I say that because holy crap I can get away with buying almost anything for myself, and since I work in retail I always have extra money at this time of year to actually enjoy it! I tend to also look around the kids aisles a lot, but it's easier to buy right now, and I get to look at stuff I'm not expected to otherwise. The exception? That's that I really get anxiety not sleeping in my own bed - I often have to stay over at a family-member's house, not having gotten my liscence or a car of my own. This is 2-fold: 1) my little side is like "waaah! I just want my teddy!" ( or any other comfort object, since I'm used to having something from "home" all the time now) and 2) my anxiety says "Don't you drink any alcohol - knowing you you'll just p*** on their couch or something!" ... Which really sucks because they always want to dink with me around Christmas. (No I'm not normally a "bedwetter"...Seriously I can count on one hand the times I wet as an adult without alcohol lol - alcohol just seems to suppress the morning glory that has a way of forcing/preventing me from wetting normally lol)

    - - - Updated - - -



    Quote Originally Posted by Note View Post
    I guess with getting older you start to realize what it all means, that it's all just another cash cow to exploit the working man and the consumer market. Kinda sad when you think about it.
    I agree, that really really frustrates me. I thought of my own Christian idea to fix the excessiveness of the holidays for if I ever have kids. The "3 present" rule - Jesus only got 3 gifts (albeit good ones ) so if I ever have kids they'll get to pick their favourite 3 things and that's it, lol. (Live animals excluded!)

  5. #5
    soggyboy

    Default

    There is one good thing about the Christmas shopping as a little though.
    You can spend a lot of time checking out the toys and clothes section without looking too strange! As I browse through the toy section I feel my little side bubbling away under the surface, and have the same sort of restrained happiness that I used to get as a child. It's also a great time to browse through the kids clothing section and check out all the cute clothes and stuff, like cartoon underwear and things that I normally feel uncomfortable looking at.

    I know that it's ok to check out the toys and stuff at any stage during the year, but it just feels particularly alright at Christmas.

    I would like to wear a diaper in the toy section though. I think my inner little would enjoy toy shopping in a diaper. If he had a little accident it wouldn't matter, lol

  6. #6

    Default

    I have decided that as of this year, I am no longer partaking in Christmas. Has never had any religious significance to me, so my participation has only ever been cultural, but as time has gone by, any enjoyment I may have felt has been replaced by reluctant tolerance and a sense that I'm simply being bullied into it because "that's what you do at this time of year". Perversely, I find myself being forced into doing something I do not enjoy under the banner of festive enjoyment. That bullying coupled with the rampant consumerism that starts ever earlier each year has made me decide I want nothing to do with it from now on, so I've decided to withdraw from proceedings entirely. The lack of stress that comes with being able to completely ignore all things Christmas themed has been palpable.

  7. #7

    Default

    X-Mas has no bearing on my DLism beyond a small part in it's root cause in my dysfunctional parents. I loathe the holidays for the hypocrisy they bring out in humans.

  8. #8

    Default

    I am such a little kid at Christmas time. I don't think I ever really grew up. I love the music, the lights, and yes, the toys in the stores. As a church director, I had our dress rehearsal tonight for our cantata. We had a social get together after the rehearsal. They always give me a card with money, and I thank them.

    Tonight I told them about my dad. He was one of eight kids growing up during the Great Depression. His mom was a full blooded Lenni Lenape Indian and his dad was a hopeless alcoholic. They lived in abject poverty. When I was four, he got me a train set: a large set of American Flyers. It had the train station (made out of metal in those days), a spot light tower, other houses and trees, little metal cars and people, a tunnel, a train crossing and all those wonderful green trees. He and I had the most fun running the big steam engine on the 4 x/8 plywood layout, also painted green.

    My wife and I have been playing our Sirius XM in the Honda, tuned to the Christmas music, much of which is from the '40s and '50s. It made me think of that train set and my dad, as it was his first trains too. I told my wife I was going to have to set them out. Yes, I still have them.

    Christmas is a time for memories, and it has a way of pulling us back, ripping all the adult years away, and if you let the magic have its way, we return for a short while to that kid we once were. The real meaning of Christmas reminds us that death is just a doorway, and one day we will return to our parents and grandparents, the ones who loved us, and with a little bit of luck, that train set may be waiting for us. God bless you guys and girls and Merry Christmas.

  9. #9

    Default

    Been a (relatively minor) rollercoaster with me.

    As a kid I loved it like most. We always did the small/immediate family thing, and within that group there's very little drama. And of course presents and just the festive atmosphere was awesome. My family was never overly religious, and I more or less became agnostic by default, so there was never a big religious element to it.

    Then after that there were a few years where it just felt like a hassle. I was really busy and stressed out with work, and it was just another thing that had to be dealt with. Figuring out presents for people became a huge chore, various gatherings felt like a chore, and the payoff just wasn't there. Horrible as it sounds, one year my attitude was "oh good, Christmas is early in the week so I can enjoy the last few days of my vacation".

    And now I'm back to enjoying it in I guess more of an adult way. My work life balance is a bit better. I'm at a point where I can comfortably say "screw it, I'm taking 4 weeks off" (I have a lot of accumulated vacation time from the "bad years" where taking time off was akin to killing puppies). Gift giving in my family is also pretty minimal. We tend to give each other joke type gifts, with the exception that my sisters and I usually pool together and get our mother something practical that she actually wants (last year it was a TV). I'm able to sit back, enjoy some time off work, and enjoy the festive spirit.

    Also while not really into the whole AB/regression thing much (more DL/BSDM), I do kinda let myself regress a bit. I tend to find myself watching Christmas movies and episodes of shows that I probably wouldn't be able to stand through most of the year, and am a bit more willing to blow money on stupid stuff I don't need.

  10. #10

    Default



    Quote Originally Posted by dogboy View Post
    Christmas is a time for memories, and it has a way of pulling us back, ripping all the adult years away, and if you let the magic have its way, we return for a short while to that kid we once were. The real meaning of Christmas reminds us that death is just a doorway, and one day we will return to our parents and grandparents, the ones who loved us, and with a little bit of luck, that train set may be waiting for us. God bless you guys and girls and Merry Christmas.
    Unfortunately for me a lot of unfortunate childhood memories come to the surface when I think about such things... So thinking back is not a pleasant experience in any way for me... That and honestly I either managed to block out my life and childhood, or I seriously have a memory problem because I can barely remember much more than the few pained and unfortunate instances... I honestly can't remember anything positive from childhood because only the limited negative has survived... It could have been the concussion I'd had - or psychological, I just don't know...But seriously, thinking back is not a positive thing either way. For me it's to live now and enjoy my family (and their amazing food!) while I still can, because honestly you could be dead tomorrow!

Similar Threads

  1. Love/Hate relationship with diapers
    By Existential in forum Diaper Talk
    Replies: 12
    Last Post: 27-Aug-2014, 19:36
  2. Love/hate
    By Abdlforever in forum Adult Babies & Littles
    Replies: 4
    Last Post: 12-Apr-2014, 02:27
  3. I f..king hate Christmas.
    By Littlebabymike in forum Mature Topics
    Replies: 27
    Last Post: 28-Dec-2010, 02:14
  4. Diaper Changes- The Love/Hate Relationship.
    By Chiharu in forum Diaper Talk
    Replies: 14
    Last Post: 03-Dec-2010, 01:20

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •  
ADISC.org - the Adult Baby / Diaper Lover / Incontinence Support Community.
ADISC.org is designed to be viewed in Firefox, with a resolution of at least 1280 x 1024.