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Thread: Am i transgender?

  1. #1

    Default Am i transgender?

    Hello I want to know if you guys think that I am transgender becuase I have dreams that I am a girl, I like girls goodnights more than boys, I like cute girl clothes more than boys, also I want to wear a skirts and have longer hair? Please help me I think I am transgender but I want yours guys opinion.

  2. #2

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    Quote Originally Posted by littleabjames View Post
    Hello I want to know if you guys think that I am transgender becuase I have dreams that I am a girl, I like girls goodnights more than boys, I like cute girl clothes more than boys, also I want to wear a skirts and have longer hair? Please help me I think I am transgender but I want yours guys opinion.
    I am definitely no expert on this subject, as we do have some in this membership who are. I think they might say that there's more to it than dreams, though that might be a starting point. I think the question is, how do you feel in terms of being a male? Do you feel like you should be a girl, not just in your dreams, but every waking hour? Do you feel that nature made a mistake?

    I don't have these feelings, so I'm a poor judge, but I've read a lot of what has been said on this site, and I read a Pulitzer Prize winning book, "The Middle Sex" which is actually about a hermaphrodite, but similar things apply.

    I'm sure those who know what they're talking about will weigh in here, so just wait for them to give you their wisdom from their own experiences. I suspect a lot of it revolves around how you perceive yourself. I will add that you can spend a lifetime trying to figure yourself out, and still have internal conflicts. I think it's part of being human.

  3. #3

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    Quote Originally Posted by littleabjames View Post
    Hello I want to know if you guys think that I am transgender becuase I have dreams that I am a girl, I like girls goodnights more than boys, I like cute girl clothes more than boys, also I want to wear a skirts and have longer hair? Please help me I think I am transgender but I want yours guys opinion.
    In the end the only one who can answer these questions is you. But remember that liking feminine designs, clothes, and hairstyles is not a sign that you are definitely transgender. Although society definitely tells us these are girl things, there is nothing that says a boy cannot like these things. The same way a girl should also not be defined as "someone who wears girly things" because it's important to remember that's not the only way to be a woman. A woman can wear pants if she wants, and I do think there will come a day where a boy can wear skirts if he wants. Although it's not that easy right now, the major point is that "like for girl clothing /=/ transgender".

    How you feel about your gender identity is a personal choice that only you can decide, and make for yourself. How you want to be, how you want the world to see you, and most important how you see yourself are only questions that you can answer. Take your time, think deeply, and remember that in the end.. no matter what you end up with is okay. If you are a girl, then I hope you let yourself become the person you most want to be. The same is for if you feel you are boy who likes feminine things. Think about the dreams you have and why they appeal to you, think about if you feel any discomfort for instance.. in your own skin and body. How you feel entering a men's restroom, how being confronted with your gender feels to you.

    There is tons of questions you can ask yourself, and like I already said you should make this yourself. Don't let anyone else tell you who you are. Even if they have the best of intentions.

  4. #4

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    To answer you I realy dont like being a male it feals like a part of me is missing I every go through it I will just go through the hormones but not the surgery I may go through the surgury.

  5. #5

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    Depends on really one thing:

    Do you want to be a girl, or do you just like girly things?

    I'm quote unquote transgender; I'd really love to be a girl. But I've decided to keep a male body and identify as a guy because there are a lot of things I want (mainly biological children) that I can't do if I were to transition. I was right up to the point of changing my name and starting HRT when I chickened out.

    Anyway, regardless of how I identify, I still loooooooove girly stuff. I like dude stuff as well (I have my video games and figures; not to say girls cant like those things! theyre just more commonly dude things!), but my point is... If you like girly stuff but don't really want to be a girl, then you're just a guy who likes girly stuff. In the ABDL (and non-ABDL regression) community, they're called Sissies, which is not supposed to be an insult (despite how the word was used as a kid).

    Crossdressing, dolls, pink, long hair, etc... you don't have to be TG to enjoy those things. A guy can be feminine without being TG. Likewise, a MTF TG/TS isn't always girly; lots of MTFs are tomboys. So like I said, it comes down to whether you like acting like a girl or if you want to be a girl.

  6. #6

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    Well I dont want to have biological children because of some medical condition that I have and I will pass it on and I dont want them to have to go through the pain I have to. Also surgury is not out of the question beuse if I start HRT and i love it then I will have the surgury. Also I have looked into HRT and it realy seems like something I want to do.

  7. #7

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    Quote Originally Posted by littleabjames View Post
    Well I dont want to have biological children because of some medical condition that I have and I will pass it on and I dont want them to have to go through the pain I have to. Also surgury is not out of the question beuse if I start HRT and i love it then I will have the surgury. Also I have looked into HRT and it realy seems like something I want to do.
    Just remember, everything is permanent with transitioning. Make sure it's really, truly what you want. Remember to consider your own dedication, and how much you're willing to do and give up to fit in. It's an everyday thing. Like with people who say they want to undergo surgery to become incontinent, yeah, it seems like a pretty fun idea at first. But it cant be undone and it becomes a hassle after a while (wearing 24/7 is a hassle without needing to, imagine not being able to take a break), so make sure you're not going to change your mind later. Look up what troubles and trials TGs have. Some people will make it out to be worse than it is, too, but likewise, it's not all fun and games.

    Long story short: don't make any quick decisions, if its easier to indulge your desires without transitioning, try that

    EDIT: my wording at the end is a little sketchy; i'll add that if they are just desires, indulge them. If you really are TG, you'll know for a long time, and it won't just be a desire

  8. #8

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    Quote Originally Posted by littleabjames View Post
    Hello I want to know if you guys think that I am transgender becuase I have dreams that I am a girl, I like girls goodnights more than boys, I like cute girl clothes more than boys, also I want to wear a skirts and have longer hair? Please help me I think I am transgender but I want yours guys opinion.
    Short answer Yes with an If, Long answer No, with a But:

    Yes, if you use the word transgender in the umbrella sense of the term (click for helpful infographic) to mean anyone who acts outside of the gender role that is expected of them. If you like to dress or look feminine, rather than the masculine look that would be expected of you, in one sense that means you are transgender.

    What I think you're really asking is: does this mean I am transsexual and I will need to have surgery and take hormones and transition and all that other scary stuff?
    No, not if you don't want to. But if you're questioning like this, it's a good idea to think about who you are, and how you feel about your gender.

  9. #9

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    I have induleged my self some and when I do I dont want it to end

  10. #10

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    Quote Originally Posted by littleabjames View Post
    I have induleged my self some and when I do I dont want it to end
    That's not uncommon. Like with any hobby, does anyone want it to end? I often find myself up an hour or more past when I should go to bed playing games.

    Anyway, as was stated, only you can answer this question for yourself. We can't tell you what you want, we can only guide you and advise caution. Another thing to remember; all the transitioning and surgery in the world can't transform you into a biological female. While a lot of it helps with passing and identifying in public, you can't truly have a female body. So, you can be a girl even with a male body. Like me. Or you can do your best to pose as a girl all the time. But like I said, just a word of caution. It's all up to you :3

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