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Thread: Infantilism vs. Pedophelia: A Comparison non-AB/DLs seem to make.

  1. #1

    Default Infantilism vs. Pedophelia: A Comparison non-AB/DLs seem to make.

    This is my first thread outside of the Introductions, but I feel it is something that should be discussed.

    Personal Experience: I was talking to a friend in a class of mine a year ago, and she brought up a television show about strange addictions. Well, she said there was a "baby-man" who wore diapers and had pacifiers. Essentially, he was an AB/DL. She had a very tentative and misguided view on this person, calling him a pedophile.

    This is an event that calls for a bit of concern. Not that this one, somewhat ignorant, student called someone a pedophile, but that this is how the world sees us now. Television programs misrepresent many groups, and AB/DLs are no exception.

    For shock value, someone like Tyra Banks will find an extreme example to show off to the vast majority of people. In response to this, people compare an unknown(Infantilism) to the most similar known(in this case, I suppose pedophilia).

    I also want to note that I understand we might never truly be accepted by the mainstream, but I am irritated we are put in the same group as people who harm and sexually abuse children. I like to think of the difference between being a pedophile and an AB/DL as this: A person wants to have sex with a millionaire(Pedophilia) vs. A person wants to be a millionaire(Infantilism).

    There is, however, a beacon of hope. Understanding is the most accurate source, at least on my account, for outsiders to get a glimpse of how we view ourselves.

    Bottom line: Continue studying, those who can, because maybe we will always be mocked and misunderstood as a group, but at least we won't be so incorrectly portrayed. Just ask yourself: "Am I a pedophile? Have I ever sexually abused a child? Is what I do wrong?" If the answer is no, and you are an AB/DL, then you have been misrepresented. No matter how secretive you are about your private life, you, me, and everybody should try our best to understand ourselves.

    If I have any misunderstandings or am missing anything, please add whatever you feel is necessary.

  2. #2


    Yeah. The pedo thing is a perennial topic here (for example). Public perception of AB/DL isn't awesome, and there really aren't any quick fixes. The best we can hope to do, in most situations, is delicately educate the people who have these kinds of misconceptions. Let's be honest: A sexual fetish for certain baby things -- not universal within AB/DL, I understand -- is hard for outsiders to rationalize. It's only natural, then, that they try to liken it to something they feel they understand better. Unfortunately for us, the comparisons are usually very unflattering.

    That's life on the fringe.

  3. #3


    And some people are not willing to learn and understand because my ex boyfriend sure didn't care if it wasn't pedophilia or not. He just wanted to keep thinking it and be so critical about it, he was a very mean judgmental person and willfully ignorant and a bigot. He even called gay people faggots and I cannot believe I was with this person in the first place and he liked to mock me and us. But anyway I decided he was never going to change and left. I already gave him a chance and I tried to educate him but he didn't wan to learn so I left.

  4. #4


    Whilst it's immensely frustrating to see ABDL linked to paedophilia by people whose concept of us is incredibly limited in terms of facts and general narrow-mindedness, I think all we can do as individuals is subtly improve the perception of ABDL.

    There'll be highly negative perceptions of us for as long as TV shows keep finding 'extreme' ABDLs to come on their shows, and as with any other fetish or lifestyle choice, individuals who take it to extremes are the ones most of society will tune in to gawp at. That's why Stanley Thornton is better known than the majority of ABs/Littles, who hold down a steady job, have a social life, and an array of non-ABDL interests, too.

    The fact that most people's exposure to ABDLs is down the creepier, more obsessive end of the spectrum heightens their idea that what we do is unhealthy. From there, it's easy for the less-informed and less-perceptive members of society to erroneously equate an obsession with childhood to an obsession with children.

    I doubt the overall public conception of ABDLs will change much until TV shows and media in general stop purposefully depicting us all as creepy and single-minded, and until society gets over its ultra-conservative fear of any unconventional lifestyle choices or sexual fetishes. I think all we can do as ADISCers is to keep proving we're a community of caring individuals living balanced lives, who happen to enjoy the sensation of diapers and/or the experience of childhood (or at least a personal re-creation of it).

    I think anyone who takes more than the slightest glance at this site will realise that our interest is in childhood experiences, not children themselves. Unfortunately, for as long as people want to judge instead of understand, we're unlikely to get as much exposure as some Dr. Phil exposť which paints ABDL in the worst light possible.

  5. #5


    Kids always out of my kinks... nothing to do with.

    But now seriously - asociating pedos with ABDL comunity is still very frecuent.

  6. #6


    I find these people who make the connection to be extremely stupid. They've done no research, so they're just speaking out of their ass.

  7. #7


    wave - actually, most people whom i have known personally have had the initial impression that diaper fetish, infantilism, and "ABDLism" is caused by child abuse, and seem to have the mis-impression that we "hide in diapers" because we are "afraid of adult sex".

    Pedophiles are insecure adults who take away the safety and innocence of children.

    "ABDLs" are adults who give themselves, and other adults, the feeling of childhood safety and innocence.

  8. #8


    Quote Originally Posted by kikee View Post
    "ABDLs" are adults who give themselves, and other adults, the feeling of childhood safety and innocence.
    In my case it's because I find adult women dressed and behaving like infants to be sexually provacative.

  9. #9


    As noted, this isn't a problem that's going away. All we can do, as individuals, is to make people understand that what we do is something strictly between consenting adults in private. That can be as weird as they want, but it has nothing to do with real children. As a community, the more we're willing to discuss the issue and educate those around us, the more the perception goes away. There can be something of a geometric sequence to it: if the average person might have a conversation involving ABDL with 5 people over the course of their lives, then every person I tell might in turn become 5 people who are educated, or 25, or 125, depending on how widely the information spreads out.

  10. #10


    AEsahaettr said, "In my case it's because I find adult women dressed and behaving like infants to be sexually provacative."
    i also find adult women who dress up like babies, and behave provocatively, to be adorable. - i want to pamper them, baby them, hug them, and kiss them. -

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