(Sorry for the long read, but this is a complicated problem.)
(tl;dr: Have any of you been occupied by AB/DL/little to the neglect of your responsibilities and how did you deal with it?)
I'm wondering if any of you have had your AB/DL/Little desires interfere with your life/work/school/responsibilities, and how did you deal with it?
I have come to realize that the majority of the time, I can only be mostly occupied with school, Asperger's special interests (similar a hobby taken to an excessive degree that is immensely satisfying, and even euphoric.), or AB/Little stuff.
My life is pretty much one thing only (possibly due to the single-mindedness of Asperger's): If it's not AB/Little, it's special interests, and when there's pressure, it's school, but then AB/Little or special interests come back with a vengeance, forcing me to "make up" the time missed on them.
This "make up" never happens with school as it can be downright dreadful and it's not as fulfilling and satisfying as AB/Little and special interests.
If I'm occupied with a week of school exams, I am either distracted by AB/Little stuff and/or my special interests, or I am studying because it is more important and ignoring my little side and my special interests. But once I get a break or even right after one of the tests, I break down and fall into special interests or AB/Little stuff.
After breaking down, studying properly cannot be recovered completely for a few weeks, by which time, there is another set of exams.
Studying one week before an exam can never be good for your grade unless it's a multiple-choice test that doesn't require working out problems, which means not good for me.
Perhaps I'm not a good fit for college. But then, I have the capacity to do the work (Some of my grades prove that I have the ability to.). However, I don't have any way to use that capacity to its fullest extent due to ADHD, Asperger's, little stuff, depression, and my general inability to live normally.
In the past and now, my AB/Little stuff, to a greater degree, and my special interests, to a lesser degree, have affected my school performance.
Not being able to handle more than one thing at a time can make me depressed, and it sometimes causes me devalue myself by thinking what's the point of living if I can't do anything profitable. I minus will be dead and suffer the difficulties of life no more. (Note: I have NEVER seriously considered suicide, and I am NOT at risk for it. I value my life too much to do it. This is simply a way of venting my frustration of not being able to live like a normal person, taking care of my responsibilities properly.)
My ability to function in the matter of schoolwork has improved somewhat since accepting my little and living as a little discretely to the outside world, but the problem of one thing at a time still persists.
I'm just wondering if any of you had similar experiences where your AB/DL/little possesses you to the point of neglecting your responsibilities. My impression is that most AB/DL/Littles take reasonable care of their responsibilities.