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Thread: A dumb question

  1. #1

    Default A dumb question

    So, my partner found out that I'm a DL the other day -- shamefully, I didn't have the guts to tell her, but had to get a train and left my computer on...with an 'ab/dl picture' (or ten) open, shall we say. Ooops.

    Fortunately, she's been exceptionally understanding, and I actually feel a huge sense of relief that she knows. After saying words like "why on earth" and laughing quite a lot at my reaction (which mostly involved trying to run away and hide), she did have a few questions -- namely things like 'don't you get nappy rash', and 'how long have you liked that sort of thing'.

    One in particular I wasn't able to answer very well: she said that she wouldn't like to try wearing in case she got thrush. I don't think this is a particular concern, largely because urine is sterile, and slightly acidic -- both of which are a Good Thing in terms of not disturbing the fauna down there. What are your experiences? How can I reassure her? I'd ideally like to get her to join at some point too, but I guess that's a way off yet .

  2. #2


    Absolute best bet, don't force it on her. Don't pressure her. This kind of thing is not something people like being made to do, the only exception being if they like being forced to do things for BDSM.

    Now, you could always reassure her about her concerns. Also make sure she's aware she doesn't have to use it. If she seems more receptive of the idea, proceed slowly. Likewise, if she seems absolutely not interested, leave it at that.

    My experiences are pretty much, out of the three I've told: I've had a girlfriend who tried it, didn't like it, didn't continue. I had a girlfriend who absolutely loved it, and kept doing it. My current girlfriend accepts that I do it, though she wasn't very keen on it at first but recently decided that she doesn't mind me doing it as long as she doesn't have to be involved. So, really, it's always up to her. The big thing is, whether its acceptance or sharing, knowledge and understanding. A lot of what people find wrong with this is misconceptions.

  3. #3


    Since I have been 24/7 for 6 months and have had no rashes or yeast or thrust, I'd say it is pretty safe. I hardly eat any sugar though and some girls that have more refined foods in the diet may be more prone to wearing. I echo the no pressure thing, but feel a high absorbancy cloth back breathable would probably keep her dryer than she is now if you get them for her to try at night during time of month maybe. As long as she is not wetting them at first they might turn out to reduce her chance of getting any thrush. As a girl I do tend to have fluids regularly even when it is not that time of the month so my padding is great for keeping me from having to run to the bathroom in a panic thinking my period started early every time I start to drip.

  4. #4


    Reassure her? It sounds like she's already quite accepting of it. And like you said, her getting into it is quite a ways off, and might actually be out of the question entirely, so don't taint her acceptance by worrying about this too much. You could try easing into indulging around her if she's okay with it, but if she isn't then leave it at that and don't test boundaries.

    My experiences? Well, 9 years ago, back when I wasn't into infantilism, a friend of mine came out to me about being ABDL herself. I was generally accepting of it and we dated for a while, but she did test my patience, my boundaries, and my privacy with it. The emotions of an ABDL are strong enough; put that on top of teenage hormones, then you get a relationship that doesn't work out. Even then, it was merely a straw that broke the camel's back, and not really the main reason we broke up.

  5. #5


    Wow, that's quite a lot of useful advice. Thank you! I'm definitely not going to force it upon her -- don't worry. She's insanely accepting, just awesome. I really do feel rather relieved. She's been asking more questions about my history with it, and I've been explaining -- so it looks like preconceptions have largely gone. I'll let you know what happens!

  6. #6


    best way to avoid fungal issues is to keep clean, change frequently, and consider powerdering up with something with a little antifungal in it. You can get sixpacks of zeesorb cheap on amazon.

  7. #7


    My wife is very accepting of me but has no interest in wearing diapers. Most of us would say that we've had this desire to wear diapers most of our lives. Something in our formative years probably created this. If someone has not had this desire nor the early childhood experiences to make who we are, it's not likely that they would share the same desire. The fact that she's accepting is awesome, so enjoy that aspect.

    As a side note, somewhat funny, my wife, after she came out of the hospital, needed some nighttime baby lotion because she had severe diarrhea from the antibiotics while in the hospital and it left a rash. I found some Aveeno baby cream and she really loved it as it was a big help. Her comment to me was that if every I get a diaper rash, I should try it. It's nice to know she cares, and that she knows her little one could get diaper rash....teeheehee.

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