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Thread: How would you tell your best mate?

  1. #1

    Default How would you tell your best mate?

    Simply what the title says!

    How would you go about it?
    Or have you already done it?

  2. #2


    Very carefully would be my answer.

    How well do you know this person? How well do you trust them? How do you think they'll react?

    Personally, I've never told anyone that I know in real life about this stuff. I've only spoken to people on sites like this one about it all.

  3. #3


    I had to tell my wife when she found my diaper order on Amazon. In fact, it's what took me to this site. I made a membership account and asked for help. They all said to be honest. Of course, getting caught is far different than making a deliberate decision to tell.

    First of all, have a good reason for telling. Knowing those reasons helps in determining if this is a good idea. Also, know your partner. Is your relationship on solid ground or could this cause it to suffer?

    Have a sense of why you like diapers, etc. I gave this a lot of thought, much of it related to childhood bullying and other causal possibilities. In my case I was adopted at the late age of two.

    I explained to my wife my history of wanting diapers. For me, it started at the age of four. All of this is helpful in making your case for acceptance. This isn't something we chose for our lives but rather, something that chose us, probably because of early childhood experiences.

    Leave time and space for your partner to ask questions. Don't tell all in the beginning as this could be a lot to take in. Small amounts of information is a good way to start because if you immediately get a bad reaction, you can back down by saying it isn't something that often dominates your life. Always leave a back door open.

  4. #4


    Personally... I wouldn't, unless you know for certain you can trust them.

  5. #5


    Quote Originally Posted by Englandnap90 View Post
    How would you tell your best mate?
    By using a language they don't understand. :-)

  6. #6


    Humm it is a hard one some mates it is best not to tell

  7. #7

  8. #8


    If it's your best friend, it shouldn't matter. I told mine, and he didn't even care. Total nonissue. I, actually, was a bit dissapointed in his lack of concern. But, maybe thats because we are older. Best friends are as busy as store checkers!

  9. #9

  10. #10


    Since the original question is how, I'm going to assume that you've thought about the why, Englandnap. If you haven't, there's some great words of caution in the thread here.

    As for how, there are two big general things I would suggestion. One, do it in a place where you and your friend have some privacy. In either of your homes, or out walking somewhere maybe. Don't do it in a public place or with other friends around. Two, do it when you've both got plenty of free time. You want an opportunity for you to speak carefully and think about what you're saying, for your friend to process everything, and for the both of you to ask and answer questions.

    In terms of presentation, couple thoughts. One route is to think about anything special or secret your friend has shared with you, especially kinky or fantasy related. You could say something like "hey remember that time when we talked about [THING]? I have something kinda like that I want to talk about, if that's okay with you." Also asking the question at the end gives them a chance to back off if they really don't want to hear any of that stuff about you. Another approach is to start from the idea of daydreams and fantasy. You can say "hey, I've got this kinda weird fantasy I'd like to talk about with you," and if they're okay with the conversation, you can explain that you imagine wearing diapers, age regression, or whatever version of ABDL that appeals to you. If they seem okay with it, you can add that you've tried really wearing diapers sometimes and you like it. If they seem disgusted, you can laugh it off and say "crazy, right?" Even if you do just blurt out the whole thing, I highly recommend opening the conversation by saying you have something unusual that you want to discuss if the friend is okay for that kind of discussion.

    Basically, what you're doing by opening with a question about whether your friend is willing to have a serious conversation with you is you're getting their buy-in to help support you before you ever reveal anything. The person is much more likely to be tolerant, helpful, and open if they feel like they've committed to talking about something. If you don't have that buy-in, they might still be fine with it, but there's also a risk that they get mad at you for dropping something like that on them unexpectedly.

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