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Thread: Should i tell my friend?

  1. #1

    Default Should i tell my friend?

    So, i am going to see my friend tomorrow, i have a box of goodnites, (the boys kind this time), we have yet to decide who goes to who's house. I was thinking of telling him since he is the one that knows me the best. I had several scenarios planned in my head.

    1. We are often arguing about who is lazier, i was thinking that i would just call them 'my lazy-pants', and that i would wear them because i am too lazy to go to the toilet while playing a (WoW-esque) game, which is partly true, it gives little room for bathroom breaks and makes diapers heaven, more heaven at least.

    2. I pretend that i wet the bed and i just have yet to get dressed (another lazy based)

    3. Lazy compitition (we do it actually quite a lot), we argue about who is lazier and as a trump card i would bull out the goodnites.

    I need your help here, should i tell him or should i not, and if yes, then how?

  2. #2

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    I wouldn't. Goodnites at best hold one good wetting then you have to change them. That is more work than using the restroom. If you had good diapers and wanted to be bold then perhaps yes. Even if he wanted to try them they would most likely leak which would be no fun for him.

  3. #3

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    If you're going to tell him, don't make up any stories or lies. Tell him the truth. Tell him you have a secret you want to share with him because you trust him, and then explain your interest. Be clear that you are only telling him because you trust him and you want someone to know. Emphasize the trust you had in him to even be able to tell him this. If you have no reason to tell him, don't, but wanting someone to be able to confide in is a good reason to tell him.

    This is sort of like coming out for LGBT folk, except it's a more private part of your life that you are sharing. You can use those situations as ways to bring up the topic, but you should be entirely honest if you're telling him at all. That doesn't mean you have to go into a ton of detail, just that you shouldn't make stuff up.

  4. #4

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    Yeah... he is not the most trusting guy, he blurts out everything to everyone. I don't know a single person that he hasn't told some of my secrets and now suddenly one of his friends (that i have never met, just talked to on skype) thinks i have a crush on my little sister, which is clearly not the case, i don't think i will tell him, he does not take a lot of things seriously

  5. #5

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    Quote Originally Posted by Zenka View Post
    Yeah... he is not the most trusting guy, he blurts out everything to everyone. I don't know a single person that he hasn't told some of my secrets and now suddenly one of his friends (that i have never met, just talked to on skype) thinks i have a crush on my little sister, which is clearly not the case, i don't think i will tell him, he does not take a lot of things seriously
    Seems like you have your answer right there.

  6. #6

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    I'd also say that you just answered your question by yourself.

    Those kinds of friends might come in handy if there's something that you want to be "spread" around, kinda like gossip.
    But if you're looking for... well what you looking for exactly? Compassion I'd say. So, when we're looking for compassion, we need someone who is deeply rooted and embraces us for our strengths and struggles. We need to honor our struggle by sharing it with someone who has earned the right to hear it. It's about connecting with the right person at the right time about the right issue. Given the fact the you can't trust him those little secrets, then it's not the right person for this kind of thing nor the right issue.

    Just be patient, there will come the right person in time eventually and then you can share this little secret.

  7. #7

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    Adding to Trevor's and daLira's comments, could be a very bad idea.

    Many of us have been there, and I certainly know myself how tempting it can be to tell a friend - because we want someone else to know in the hope they'll understand and show some support. In my experience though, I wouldn't do it again; and if I could I'd go back and change it. I told one person to begin with, who I trusted a lot; and still do. She took it well(ish), but I then thought "that was easy!" and went on to tell another three people who seemed trustworthy and understanding. As it happens, one of them wasn't nearly as honest and trustworthy as I thought, and over time more and more people were hearing things; the worst part being that - as with all gossip - bits got added making it seem even worse than how I told it.

    The problem is you can't undo knowledge; and I hope you, and anyone else reading this, takes that into serious consideration.
    It is challenging and can be frustrating, but sometimes it's best kept to yourself for the time being.

    Ultimately, he's your friend, and only you know him; I'm sure you'll make the right decision.

    D.

  8. #8

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    Well my friend came over and we went to the store, i saw the package of goodnites and said as a joke (according to him) "Hey, look, Bathroom trip cancelers." He responded not like i thought he would, he said that it would be gross wearing a diaper and that (and as always) that he would kill me if i would buy them (half of what comes out of his mouth are empty threats, i still have no broken bones and am very much alive for the 20-30 other times he said it)

    He is coming again tomorrow to a LAN or a sleepover, depending if we can survive the whole night. I was planning on wearing one of them then but that wouldn't be such a great idea after all i suppose. Well thank you for your advice still, it has been really helpful

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