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Thread: Most Discreet Pull Up

  1. #1

    Default Most Discreet Pull Up

    So I'm mildly incontinent (as in, I may have an accident or two or three once every 1 or 2 weeks), and I wear pull ups as a solution. I'm wearing Tena underwear for women. The problem is, they tend to bunch up and look goofy around my crotch, and they make my butt look too unnatural. Spandex doesn't seem to really help. Plus they come up kinda high. These also tend to kinda shift around during the day and get kinda annoying (the leg cuffs aren't snug at all).

    Are there any other pull up brands that can be recommended? I prefer pull ups because I can usually make it to the restroom, but a pad wont work because when I have accidents, I can't stop them and they're usually too big for a pad.

  2. #2


    Hi, Pixie. Have you tried the Depend Silhouette? They're specifically made for women, have a very snug fit, and are extremely discreet. They're not the most capacious pull-ups out there, but they completely disappear under clothing and are the most underwear-like. I often wear the Depend Real Fit (male version of the Silhouette) and you absolutely can't tell I'm wearing them.


  3. #3


    I haven't tried them. Sometimes I wet heavy, how capacious are they?

  4. #4


    Well, I wouldn't recommend a flooding them with a full bladder, but they will take several small accidents and will end up holding several ounces if given time to absorb in. If you've ever used Depend underwear before, you'll likely recognize the pad, but the improved, more body-hugging shape offers better protection because there's less gapping around the legs, where most leaks happen.

    The most capacious pull-ups I've ever used are the Abena Abri-Flex, but they're far from discreet. Life is a balancing act, and there's no replacement for experimentation.


  5. #5


    The most capacious pull-ups I've ever used are the Abena Abri-Flex, but they're far from discreet. Life is a balancing act, and there's no replacement for experimentation.



    So true. Right on.


    Just for presentation purposes, I've found this chart from XP MEDICAL to be helpful for comparisons:

    Adult Diaper Review and Testing


  6. #6


    I've had a couple accidents where it's leaked because I'd fill it too fast I think. When I'm having an event, I can kind of pinch it off for a second or two before it hurts way too much to hold it. I really don't want to wear the tape on ones because pull ups are so convenient. I make it to the toilet too often to have to untape a diaper every time I go.

    This really sucks. It makes me not want to even go outside. I hate having to deal with this

  7. #7


    I completely understand your concerns, Pixie. If you need the protection of a tape-on, but want something discreet you can pull down as needed, I would strongly recommend that you consider the Tena Ultra Stretch. These have a wide elastic belt on each side, with "Velcro" fasteners that stay put. The elasticity of the sides means you can pull them up and down more easily, and the Ultras (which are thinner than the more capacious Supers), disappear well under looser clothing.

    These may well be the compromise that will work best for you but, again, you'll want to experiment. Most manufacturers, Tena included, offer free samples.


  8. #8


    Pixie: You can go the route of a pull-up plus a booster. Again, experimentation is key, how big a booster pad (Abena makes good ones), what combination of booster and pullup, etc. Only time will bring you to conclude what is BEST. We are too individualized to simply parrot out the BEST product. All of our needs and wants are so different. Some of us even venture into using diaper-covers, overpants or vinyl/plastic/rubber pants, if you will. Even these come in varied styles, but they can be useful a times to contain leaks and/or odor better. Personal comfort, climate, mobility issues are a factor for some to consider with the use of overpants/bloomers, etc.

    Those us who have managed incontinence for a time will all detail a process that takes a lot of experimentation and trial/error. Advice here and new product offerings are still important and this is one place to find what is out there, even if highlighted by members of the ab/dl community. This community DOES provide an important array of information for those of us who are incontinent.

    Your early thoughts on this mirror the uncertainties we first encountered, privately, when incontinence started with us. It is imposed upon us and we hate having to deal with it, often and permanently on a 24/7 basis...for years. It sucks loud, granted; but it can be managed and you can still get out there, and I do mean OUTSIDE, and live life! Seeing me on a Harley roadtrip will underscore that.

    my thoughts...


  9. #9


    I'm sure it's been talked about a zillion times before on this forum. I just need some advice from somewhere. I don't have much money because I'm out of a job and wanting to go back to school, so I really don't have too much room for spending money.

    I think I'm just going to need to break down and get new jeans or never go out in jeans. That's why this sucks. Plus these things bunch up so it looks funny under my clothes. Maybe I should just go to skirts? IDK. Maybe there's a better place to ask this or find this out. I am just experimenting. I'm too embarrassed to ask my mom. My roommate is one of those pass it offs like "Yeah looks good". I'm really just embarrassed to talk about it and have nobody to talk to.

  10. #10


    Never say never! (yes, I still wear jeans)...

    In time, some of the women here will offer up their advice and I'm sure you'll benefit from their perspective, too. You'll find your way.

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