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Thread: Need Help with Talking about Therapy

  1. #1

    Default Need Help with Talking about Therapy

    Over the past few months I've come to realize that I might be able to benefit from therapy. I want to mainly use it for talking about sexuality. I don't really feel comfortable talking about this with a male therapist because I'm going to feel awkward about it.

    The main point of this thread is that I don't really know how to tell my parents that I want to see a therapist. Any suggestions or advice would be helpful.

    Thanks.

  2. #2

    Default



    Quote Originally Posted by JazzBaby View Post
    Over the past few months I've come to realize that I might be able to benefit from therapy. I want to mainly use it for talking about sexuality. I don't really feel comfortable talking about this with a male therapist because I'm going to feel awkward about it.

    The main point of this thread is that I don't really know how to tell my parents that I want to see a therapist. Any suggestions or advice would be helpful.

    Thanks.
    Well don't tell your parents that you are seeing a therapist then. That is none of their business. I myself have never told anything to my own parents about me seeing a therapist. If they can't handle the fact that your over 18 and can make your own decisions then they need to just get over it. It sounds to me like they will not leave you alone and that is a unhealthy thing to do. By law the therapist cannot give out personal information that you might tell him/her about unless you appear to be about to hurt either yourself or someone else and even then the therapist is only allowed to tell certain agencies about that possibility immediately and not even your parents without your express consent written on paper. Just go to a location that would have adult therapist's and ask to see one. even though your insurance will get processed your parents do not need to know. Now if your insurance requires you to make a co-pay just make sure that you are the one paying it in order to keep that information to yourself and that should be the end of it. I hope this helps.

  3. #3

    Default

    Do you have a specific complaint/concern with regards to your sexuality?

    In my experience, most therapists deal with patients on the level of trying to solve problems/complaints -- I'd expect she will ask you this once you find one.

    Another thing is that depending on what specifically you're wanting to look at and work on, there are many different styles of therapy and 'treatment' that different people specialize in. Some of these methodologies suit certain people and not others -- being new in therapy, you'll have to figure out what ones you prefer and work the best for you. Many of them have their own certifications and if you go to a site like psychology today, it'll list the treatment platforms a given therapist is qualified to use.

    Also, many therapists will utilize a "sliding scale" for payment. Which means that they take into account your financial/insurance sitaution when billing. If you are paying cash, they'll bill you based on a scale and fit you into a price-point that suits your income. The therapy/service offered doesn't change based on the different price points. Is a kind of democratized system where the more wealthy of us pay more so that the under/unemployed people can afford to go as well. Nice.

    Also -- be sure to know that you're not under obligation to keep going to a therapist if she doesn't 'click' with you. In fact, a good therapist will want to make sure that there's good rapport, that she's helping you figure out what you want figured out, and that it's a valuable experience. The best will find you a different therapist if you just don't match well. Look for someone who offers that advice/perspective/service. Others might be more money or ego driven...steer clear.

    Good luck!

  4. #4

    Default



    Quote Originally Posted by JazzBaby View Post
    Over the past few months I've come to realize that I might be able to benefit from therapy. I want to mainly use it for talking about sexuality. I don't really feel comfortable talking about this with a male therapist because I'm going to feel awkward about it.

    The main point of this thread is that I don't really know how to tell my parents that I want to see a therapist. Any suggestions or advice would be helpful.

    Thanks.
    You are 22 according to your profile... that makes you an "adult" no matter where you live...
    So why do you need to tell your PARENTS that you want to see a therapist??

    It is a personal matter and you're old enough to handle that "on your own" (like search for a good therapist, and go to therapy).
    I fail to see why you need to involve your parents.
    Unless of course you want / need them to be IN THERAPY WITH YOU for some reason... but I doubt that.

    Also your sexuality is your business - and not your parents concern directly.. so again, if you feel like you need therapy to overcome certain issues, etc... go for it...
    There's nothing wrong with going to therapy...

  5. #5

    Default



    Quote Originally Posted by JazzBaby View Post
    Over the past few months I've come to realize that I might be able to benefit from therapy. I want to mainly use it for talking about sexuality. I don't really feel comfortable talking about this with a male therapist because I'm going to feel awkward about it.

    The main point of this thread is that I don't really know how to tell my parents that I want to see a therapist. Any suggestions or advice would be helpful.

    Thanks.
    When you make your initial appointment they will ask a lot of questions.

    The standard health issue stuff, then they will get into the exact issues you feel the need for therapy. Be honest, if you are uncomfortable, tell them, and they should ask if you prefer male or female and will help work with you to make the best match possible.

    From there you will get a feeling of the therapist when you meet them. Again be honest to there questions and do not just start dumping everything out until you know if you 1) can trust them, 2) they are listening to you, and 3) they are looking for ways to help you.

    My first one was(had to be) fresh out of school because he was like talking to a text book.
    I had several good ones after that, then wound up with a "judgmental egotist" that I guess I was suppose to be in awe of his wonderful skills.
    Then I had some great ones after that. My problem is that just when I find a real good therapist, they either go hospital based or quit because the malpractice insurance is so high they cant afford to practice anymore.

    So hang in there and remember you are the one in need and if they are not helping you, you have the right to ask for someone else.

    Good luck.

  6. #6
    CrinklySiren

    Default

    Well, you go up to your parents and tell them you want to see a therapist to talk about some things on your mind that you want to talk to a professional about.

    You'd be surprised how normal it has become for young adults to have bi-weekly therapist sessions, even in freshman year of highschool almost all my friends had psychologists they would see, and none of them suffered from anything like anxiety or depression, they often just saw a psychologist to help them understand their situations in life that they don't feel comfortable enough talking to their parents about, nor feel enough trust in their friends to ask for their input. Having a therapist doesn't always mean something's wrong, its like having a vocal diary that actually gives you feedback.

    Just don't forget that you have a choice in the matter, you can choose what therapist you want and you are entitled to liking or not liking a specific one. If you go to one therapist and end up totally loving them, then don't feel compelled to do more searching, find someone you enjoy talking to or someone who seems to respond to you in a way that you like, and stick with them. Though honestly, I think you should seek out a sexologist, because normal psychologists or mental wellness psychologists will be able to offer you little in-depth advice or words about sexuality and kinks and quirks etc. as they are not trained in the colorful world of out-of-the-ordinary sexuality. Unless of course, you are just looking for basic sexual relations information or help.

    My psychologist is a gender specialist, but she's also a sexologist, so I can go to her with my gender issues as well as anything related to my sexuality in terms of ABDL, BDSM etc. because she knows all about it.

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