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Thread: Fantasy and Real Life Disappointment

  1. #1

    Default Fantasy and Real Life Disappointment

    Last weekend I got to fulfill a fantasy I have had for years, having my wife try wearing a diaper. For the past few years, she has fully supported me having this fetish, but it is not her thing. In the past we have discussed our fantasies, but she was not ready to try wearing a diaper. I never pushed the idea on her, but last week she told me she is ready to try one on and fulfill my fantasy.

    She told me this a day or two in advance, so I was really looking forward to it. When the time came, I was pretty excited as we walked upstairs to our room. As I put the Tena Slip Maxi on her, she said how she doesn't like the plastic feel and how wide the padding is between her legs. Putting the diaper on her was also weird since I'm used to just diapering myself. She put some lounge pants on and we went downstairs to watch some TV for a bit.

    Knowing that she does not get enjoyment out of it, I noticed it took my enjoyment out of the fantasy as well. I usually think seeing an attractive woman in a diaper is sexy and was looking forward to seeing my wife in one. Surprisingly, I actually did not find the diaper on her that attractive. I was surprised that my fantasy was better off just in my head and that in real life, I was a bit disappointed. It may be that since this activity has been such a personal thing for me, never shared with anyone before, I just am not totally comfortable. I also think I would have enjoyed it if my wife got enjoyment out of it.

    In conclusion, she wore it for about an hour watching TV on the couch, but then it was time for some adult fun, so off it came. She is open to trying it again, but I'm in no rush. My thought is for her to try one of my Abena Abriflex smalls next time. It will be a better fit and she might prefer the cloth backed.

    I'm sure many have had similar fantasies. I've read how some people here have had their partners get involved and I always fantasized having that as well. Are there others her that have had a similar experience, finding that the fantasy wasn't all that great in reality?

  2. #2


    Yep. That's how fantasies are. Sometimes the image in your head is way better than the real thing. I've tried bottles and pacis thinking I might be more than DL, and nope, did nothing for me at all. On the other hand, there have been things in real life that turned out to be way better than I thought they would be.

  3. #3


    This happened to me as well... several times. The interesting thing: No matter how long I had certain fantasies, as soon as they didn't work out, they were gone. I also had almost the same experience you discribed, lampkins. My girlfriend supports me, but she is not into diapers herself. So being changed by her, seeing her wearing a diaper or even her seeing me wearing was strange at times. That's sad, but on the other hand, if you don't try it, how could you ever know?
    Also, it might be your fantasy seeing her diapered, but it could be a way for her to understand what diapers in general mean to you. I bet the whole experience was strange for her as well. From my own experience I would say, talking to each other is important, but also giving each other time to get familiar with it. The fantasy might not have worked out for you right now, but if she wants to give it a try again, it might work out for both of you in the long run.

  4. #4


    I agree strongly with Astatine. It could just be that it was the first time, so it feels awkward to you and unusual to her. But as long as she is interested in trying it again, why not give it another shot down the road? The second time could be completely different. Just wait for the right timing and mood

  5. #5


    While it doesn't involve another person, I did have a disappointment not too long ago. From all I heard about them, I thought wearing a Bambino was going to be a wonderful experience. But when I got a sample pack and put one on, it didn't match the fantasy. It was too big, too noisy, and the plastic backing made my butt sweat. While I did enjoy the thickness, it felt like I was wearing a garbage bag.

  6. #6


    Interesting, because this is the exact opposite of what I have experienced. Some of the very best moments in my life have been first shared diapering pleasures, even with partners who haven't specifically been DL's. Trying different diapers on her and admiring the results, cheering her on while she does her first wet, even the rather embarrassing first messy change, all total bliss. Perhaps I have been lucky, that none of the SO's involved in these moments have genuinely disliked diaper play, although the reception was sometimes neutral rather than particularly positive.

    I wonder whether it has to do with what you enjoy about diapers yourself. If you wear mainly for comfort or age play, I can see that the effect of someone else wearing might be limited. OTOH, if you find them a turn-on in an adult sexual context, it seems more likely that there was some inhibiting factor, such as your wife's dislike of the feel of the diaper, that put a damper on what could be a fantastic shared pleasure. Work at it, make it as nice as possible for her, stop at nothing to ensure her comfort and pleasure. When she gets a warm glow from it, I bet you will!

  7. #7


    I once put a diaper on my ex boyfriend and I made him pee in it and he took it off right after he did it. He said he didn't like it so I never put one on him again. I also wanted to diaper my other ex but he preferred to do I himself because I couldn't put them on tight enough and he did a far better job than I did. I probably only did it three times and that was it. Plus he wasn't comfortable with it. I even have a hard time putting them on my husband because of his body size and I think if he were a lot thinner, I would have no problem with it so it takes the fun out of putting one on him. I prefer thin people in them and find it easy to put one on them but sadly my husband isn't thin but that is life. Not all fantasies come true.

  8. #8


    To be perfectly honest, the first time I ever wore a diaper (since early childhood) was a bit of a disappointment. There was excitement around it, and I love wearing them, but my fantasy had been built up over many years to the point that there was basically no way that any physical reality was going to compare. Since angels didn't start playing trumpets from the heavens the second I put one on, I was a bit disappointed. That's life though, and as I've continued to wear, there have been some really nice moments that felt pretty great.

  9. #9


    I was actually on the other end of the scenario. Back in high school, I was going over to a close friend's house for a school project and one night she came out to me about being an ABDL, straight-up telling me that she feels she knows me enough to trust me with her secret. At the time, I didn't show any interest in it nor did it bother me. However, it was clear as day that this was something you cannot confide to just anyone with, so it felt great being so heavily trusted. After a while, she wanted our relationship to be more serious, which we tried; sometimes we would say "screw this project, let's just watch a movie", and she often would sit on the couch nestled close to me, wearing a t-shirt and a goodnite. I had a good time with her, she felt comfortable indulging in her little side around me while never trying to push me into any ABDL activities, and there were other reasons why our relationship didn't work out, but it did always prey on the back of my mind that she was testing her boundaries with me, and that it was 99% likely that she wanted me in a diaper at least once eventually, which would've lead to more awkward scenarios that I wasn't prepared to approach. So, I didn't make her first moments wearing her diaper exposed in front of someone else as much as she probably cracked it up to be.

    I guess it serves me right that that time in my life is what switched on this fetish for me.

  10. #10


    Maybe a large part of the deal with diapers lies in the fantasy, not in reality. Is it "really" a good thing to walk around in a wet diaper? I guess most real IC would give up their condition if they could. Funny enough, we try to deny this and find reasons to wear... like, "I'm doing a long road trip so really wearing makes sense" - or all those threads about "Do astronauts wear diapers" and "In what jobs do you have to wear a diaper". But from a rational, external point of view, maybe it does not really make sense, once you ignore the fantasy.

    If you have enough empathy you must have realized that for your wife, there was no fantasy. And it must have shut your own fantasy down. What you want is your wife to share your fantasy, not just to wear a diaper. Point is, we like to fantasize about what would happen in real-life... for many real-life seems to be the biggest, ultimate, source of fantasies... but when it comes to real-life, it has to be seen through the eye of fantasy. Otherwise... maybe it's just reality with you wearing a cold and dirty wet diaper.

    Takes some time to admit our brain is... working is some strange ways...

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