Results 1 to 7 of 7

Thread: how to cope with Anxiety and Stress

  1. #1

    Default how to cope with Anxiety and Stress

    ok im in a bad state of being right now. my attitude has always been an "i don't give a fuck" attitude with dealing with every aspect of my life so i have never had to deal with anxiety or stress in the past because frankly i just didn't care one way or another. but recently im starting to slip into a patch of worry and stress about sending my son back to Arizona with his mother for a week.

    a little back story he was concived at a rave in the desert while we were flying on all kinds of shit, most of which psycoactive. well when i realized exactly what had happened that night i checked us both into a long term rehab facility to not only try to readjust my life for the new baby but to also make sure she didn't use while pregnant. he was born there at the facility and we checked out shortly after. well not long before she slipped back into the rave scene and was back on all that shit, thats when i decided it was time to go and i took our son and moved to Kentucky with my mom. havent spoke to her since. well now out of nowhere she pops back up demanding some visitation time and suggested his spring break.

    im not sure what her situation is there, if she is even still useing, what i can expect, or anything for that matter. this is my little boy, im very nervous about this. i havent been able to sleep well lately i either spend most the night just watching him sleep or take him to my room and hold him while i cry myself to sleep.

    i have never had these feelings before and never this intense, i don't know what to do to actually cope with this. im loosing sleep over this and driving myself insane.

  2. #2

    Default

    From what little I know, has your ex been paying child support? Have you gone to court to set up child support payments? Usually, if the other parent is not supporting their child, they can lose the right to see the child. If she is still using, she would be deemed unfit to have the child in unsupervised custody. Your first priority is to protect the child, so you may have to spend some money to accomplish this, but it's important that you do. The child always comes first. Kudos to you for cleaning up your life and doing the responsible thing. Keep fighting.

  3. #3

    Default



    Quote Originally Posted by w0lfpack91 View Post
    (it may be more complicated than this)
    w0lfpack91,

    Unless the child-bearer has only been away from the child for a short while...there is no proof of motherhood essentials... As dogboy said, your first and primary responsibility is to the child's well-being...nothing more...

    Sentiments for the 'mother', are nothing more than that, especially for an unfit, or unknown fittedness of a mother (parent)... you have every right and responsibility to have this determined, first and foremost...

    ..and with supervised visitation...

    Unfortunately, some of those who take on the drug and party scene as a career of sorts...may get to a point of secondary characteristics that essentially make their better notions unavailable to them...least of which that they may act accordingly for themselves or others, let alone a child...no matter how well intending...

    There may well be some deep psychological issues underlying this too for her, and additional ones that come up over the longer term of heavy and chronic, and compulsory drug use...

    I'm sorry, but from what little I know from this...you cannot trust her, and you must not trust her...period... at least not as far as a child is concerned...

    If you cannot afford legal representation, your state department of health and social services may be able to help you... and look for free legal aid and advocacy in your area to find out more...

    Your fears and concerns are not unfounded! Your only obligation and responsibility is to the well being of this child...period...

    I hope that I've helped!
    -Marka

  4. #4

    Default



    Quote Originally Posted by dogboy View Post
    From what little I know, has your ex been paying child support? Have you gone to court to set up child support payments? Usually, if the other parent is not supporting their child, they can lose the right to see the child. If she is still using, she would be deemed unfit to have the child in unsupervised custody. Your first priority is to protect the child, so you may have to spend some money to accomplish this, but it's important that you do. The child always comes first. Kudos to you for cleaning up your life and doing the responsible thing. Keep fighting.
    no child support has ever been done before like i said i got emergency custody and just up and left. she never so much as called after that, no court or custody battles. it shocked me when she just called and droped this on me.



    Quote Originally Posted by Marka View Post
    w0lfpack91,

    Unless the child-bearer has only been away from the child for a short while...there is no proof of motherhood essentials... As dogboy said, your first and primary responsibility is to the child's well-being...nothing more...

    Sentiments for the 'mother', are nothing more than that, especially for an unfit, or unknown fittedness of a mother (parent)... you have every right and responsibility to have this determined, first and foremost...

    ..and with supervised visitation...

    Unfortunately, some of those who take on the drug and party scene as a career of sorts...may get to a point of secondary characteristics that essentially make their better notions unavailable to them...least of which that they may act accordingly for themselves or others, let alone a child...no matter how well intending...

    There may well be some deep psychological issues underlying this too for her, and additional ones that come up over the longer term of heavy and chronic, and compulsory drug use...

    I'm sorry, but from what little I know from this...you cannot trust her, and you must not trust her...period... at least not as far as a child is concerned...

    If you cannot afford legal representation, your state department of health and social services may be able to help you... and look for free legal aid and advocacy in your area to find out more...

    Your fears and concerns are not unfounded! Your only obligation and responsibility is to the well being of this child...period...

    I hope that I've helped!
    -Marka
    he will be 5 later this year and she has not seen him since he was a couple months old, she has been away for almost all 4 years of his life. and your right i don't trust her at all. my biggest fear is if she gets him she will just hop on a jet and fly out of country with him possibly to her parents villa in Italy. at that point i dont know how id ever see him again. now this may just be over reaction fear but she has the recources to do it.

    ill look into the legal representation and court stuff, i just wished it would never come to this. if nothing else i may just send him to my Fathers house and she can just visit with him there. but i am not able to go with him or i would my job interfears.

  5. #5

    Default

    Hey dude I totally missed this thread. I hope you're feeling ok. It seems to me like you're in a pretty strong position not that that will make it any less stressful or emotional for you.
    Unfortunately, you have to deal with it for your sons sake and for your own happiness. Get good legal advice.

  6. #6

    Default

    Getting back on the track of dealing with anxiety and stress, I will recommend an App on the Android market called, "Tactical Breather". It's main focus is to take you through some breathing therapy to help you relax and deal better with situations. The basic premise is that under stress and duress, the body breathes faster and heavier. The buildup of Carbon Dioxide and lack of Oxygen basically makes it harder for your brain and body to work. By doing tactical breathing, you slow your heart rate down, calm your mind, and are better equipped to deal with stressful situations.

    Other great ways to deal with stress and anxiety are to drink water. No, really. Most adults don't drink enough water each day. Drinking enough water and ensuring proper hydration can do great things for the body. Also, exercise. By working out, running, going for a walk, or just doing physical work your body releases endorphins that help relieve stress. Finally, meditation. Sitting down, getting into a zone can help a lot. I don't mean sitting cross legged with your fingers making that circle thingy...what I mean is doing whatever you find helpful to block out the rest of the world and putting yourself in a mind state of relaxation. One thing I've heard someone doing was putting a pair of headphones on, sitting on a bed, and thinking to himself, "Here, now". He wasn't listening to any music, but you could if you find that helps.

    And my final piece of advice for dealing with stress and anxiety. DON'T IGNORE THE PROBLEM. Alcohol or other coping devices (little time) will not help make the problem go away. It will still be there. You are getting some other great advice from other people on how to best handle the problem. My advice for the short term is water, exercise, tactical breathing.

    I hope this is helpful!

  7. #7

    Default

    You know were i am if you ever want to chat, vinewood.

Similar Threads

  1. How do you cope?
    By Littleraindrop in forum Off-topic
    Replies: 17
    Last Post: 17-Mar-2014, 08:55
  2. Replies: 18
    Last Post: 05-Jan-2014, 07:18
  3. Just trying to cope, alone with my preferences in relationship.
    By cuteshylaugh in forum Adult Babies & Littles
    Replies: 5
    Last Post: 18-Jun-2013, 22:25
  4. How do you cope with horror movies?
    By KryanAshford in forum Off-topic
    Replies: 43
    Last Post: 02-May-2013, 02:18
  5. how do you cope with losing a family pet
    By LilRetroBoy in forum Off-topic
    Replies: 26
    Last Post: 05-Feb-2012, 17:54

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •  
ADISC.org - the Adult Baby / Diaper Lover / Incontinence Support Community.
ADISC.org is designed to be viewed in Firefox, with a resolution of at least 1280 x 1024.