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Thread: Dating again?

  1. #1

    Default Dating again?

    My divorce was final a little under two years ago and, at that time, I figured being an old fart I would just accept my fate and live alone 'til I died. I'm beginning to look at it a little differently now and actually thinking of dating. (true, so far. skip to paragraph two if you want to avoid the bs). I wonder if I'm being slightly unrealistic seeking to date a Victoria's Secrets model. I know, Iknow... Some of you are thinking: "Drifter, Drifter, Drifter. Those girls are too vain and shallow for a meaningful relationship", and you may be right. But... if there's one thing I've gotten from having this dirty little diaper fetish for 60 years it's a more open minded perspective on people and, as vain as these little hotties might appear, deep inside them beats a heart of gold and I am willing to give them a chance. (call me sentimental if you want)

    Sorry. I live in the northern U.S. of A. and one of the symptoms of cabin fever is dementia. (friggin' snow never stops!!!) Not to worry, though. The seven foot aardvark on the ceiling says I don't have it.

    On a more serious note..
    I haven't had to think about the dating scene for nearly 50 years now but I think I can give it a shot again. I'm not really looking for dating advice (however... if you have good advice for old codgers...), but I am concerned about one thing: suppose I hook up with a desirable lady who, by some miracle, falls for me.
    Holy shit!!!... now what?
    Do I tell her my dirty little secret and risk blowing a wonderful romance? Or do I hide it and end my final years as a fraud? I love all the trappings of a normal relationship. I love straight sex. But I also have a little diaper demon in me that won't go away. OMG... what to do...
    Last edited by Drifter; 02-Mar-2014 at 02:39.

  2. #2

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    Hey there! To qualify an answer, did your ex know abut your fetish? Did she know from the get go? Was she accepting of it? Did the fetish lead to the divorce (no need to answer this one, if you don't want to)?

    I'm just thinking that whatever worked for you before might work again. I know a lot of 50+ year old women who are looking for men. Maybe they would be a little more lenient now that they're wiser in the worldly ways. I also know of two women who were married again in their late 40's.
    Last edited by Scaramouche; 02-Mar-2014 at 04:30. Reason: Clarified questions

  3. #3

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    Well, at your age, you could say you have a problem with incontinence. That's a smaller lie than saying you are incontinent. Short of that, as people get older, they become more set in their ways. I think it would be harder to find an older person who would accept being AB/DL, but who knows. From what I understand, some of those older women are horny for men, and some would go to extreme lengths to marry again. You won't know unless you try, honesty and all.

  4. #4

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    Quote Originally Posted by zipperless View Post
    Hey there! To qualify an answer, did your ex know abut your fetish? Did she know from the get go? Was she accepting of it? Did the fetish lead to the divorce (no need to answer this one, if you don't want to)?
    She knew while we were dating that I had a thing for diapers but this was pre-internet so neither of us really understood the extent of it. She was never very accepting of it, though she did try. It was a significant factor in the divorce.


    Quote Originally Posted by zipperless View Post
    I'm just thinking that whatever worked for you before might work again. I know a lot of 50+ year old women who are looking for men. Maybe they would be a little more lenient now that they're wiser in the worldly ways. I also know of two women who were married again in their late 40's.
    I don't get out much, and that, of course, has to change. Wish I knew a lot of 50+ women looking for men. (actually I'd prefer a 30 yo sex goddess but I'm trying to get realistic)

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    Quote Originally Posted by dogboy View Post
    Well, at your age, you could say you have a problem with incontinence. That's a smaller lie than saying you are incontinent. Short of that, as people get older, they become more set in their ways. I think it would be harder to find an older person who would accept being AB/DL, but who knows. From what I understand, some of those older women are horny for men, and some would go to extreme lengths to marry again. You won't know unless you try, honesty and all.
    With an enlarged prostate combined with the fact that I drink a lot of water for diet control a "problem with incontinence" isn't actually completely untrue, although the problem is avoidable if I alter my lifestyle. I've considered that angle (saying I have a problem with incontinence), at least as a starting point, but I would have trouble living a lie. Sooner or later I would have to fess up and take the consequences.

    I'd like to meet some of these "horny" women although the idea of them being desperate for marriage is a little scary. My dream lady would be a cute 50ish AB looking for a caretaker or daddy. I wonder if such a creature exists.

  5. #5

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    I honestly think they're out there, but of course, they'd be very hard to find. Maybe on Fetlife? Of course, there, you never know if you would find a wack job, something to be avoided at all costs.

  6. #6

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    Are there any furcons near you? I know you're not a furry, but there could be some overlap. I also see you're a football fan - any bars near you? There MIGHT be some female fans there with friends or friends of friends. Just a couple of thoughts.

  7. #7

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    Quote Originally Posted by dogboy View Post
    I honestly think they're out there, but of course, they'd be very hard to find. Maybe on Fetlife? Of course, there, you never know if you would find a wack job, something to be avoided at all costs.


    Quote Originally Posted by zipperless View Post
    Are there any furcons near you? I know you're not a furry, but there could be some overlap. I also see you're a football fan - any bars near you? There MIGHT be some female fans there with friends or friends of friends. Just a couple of thoughts.
    Yeah I know I have to get off my butt and start mingling. I'm a couple of hours away from Chicago so dropping in on freaky conventions isn't out of the question. I've never done that yet but it could be interesting. I haven't been on fetlife yet either. Guess I'll have to check it out but with some hesitancy because of the "wack jobs".

    As I've said, after my divorce I kind of assumed I would just live alone and not really try to make something happen. Now I'm not so sure that is a good plan. Sometimes it seems the things you want are too difficult to accomplish so the sensible thing appears to be to forget these desires and move on. On the other hand, if you don't go for the things you want in this lifetime what do you do? ... plan on coming back in another life to do it?

  8. #8

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    when it comes to furry fandom, the vast majority of us are under 30, and women are just as hard to find in the furry fandom as in the ab/dl scene.
    I'm not saying it isn't worth a try, but as far as furries go, if you are a straight male of just about any age, you're gonna have a hard time finding a suitable mate......

  9. #9

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    Quote Originally Posted by Drifter View Post
    so the sensible thing appears to be to forget these desires and move on. On the other hand, if you don't go for the things you want in this lifetime what do you do? ... plan on coming back in another life to do it?
    And maybe it comes down to one or the other. Perhaps put the diapers aside for awhile and pursue companionship. Maybe you'll find someone who is kinky or is open minded.

    Wasn't sure of the ages as furry conventions. Leppard is somewhat of a veteran of them, so he would know.

    Have you thought about online dating services, btw?

  10. #10

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    Quote Originally Posted by DeftLeppard View Post
    when it comes to furry fandom, the vast majority of us are under 30, and women are just as hard to find in the furry fandom as in the ab/dl scene.
    I'm not saying it isn't worth a try, but as far as furries go, if you are a straight male of just about any age, you're gonna have a hard time finding a suitable mate......
    I have a theory about this (of course). I think being born with a penis makes us more susceptable to sexual or emotional stimulation in early development. Whether it's imprinting, as I believe, or psychological, it's not hard to imagine all kinds of possible associations in our little, pre-language minds when experiencing ecstatic feelings. I think this is why you find many more males than females with kinky desires.

    Thanks for the heads up about furcons. Picture some old guy there, wandering around trying to hookup. Sheesh. On the other hand... maybe it's time to say F it and loosen up a little.

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