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Thread: When is it considerd the closet?

  1. #1

    Question When is it considerd the closet?

    I am open about my love for girly stuff but often times I like to call it gender natural. I am comfortable being a man. The gender separation for bathrooms is understandable to me simply because it would be awkward to use a toilet with a women in the next stall over.

    I always had that weird dream where I was in a bathroom with both men and women in it. After being honest with myself with my little pony those dreams went away and I slowly started to care less about gender specific things being off limits.

    I can't imagine wearing a dress though. Every time I look at a woman in normal daylight I often wonder if she is uncomfortable in the dress. I wonder if she worries about a really strong wind hitting her dress just right and the umbrella affect just happens. With that said I still love the idea to cross dress.

    The only problem is women can pull this off a lot easier than men simply because there is nothing hanging. Excuse my vivid description but I really could not figure out how to explain it different. I am thinking about sewing my own gender natural cloths and letting myself be who I am. I still am scared to what people think because I normally wear girly pj's to bed. Would that make me stuck in the closet? Thanks to those of you who actually read this whole thing.

  2. #2


    I am "new to this" too, but "I know that feel bro" hihihi.
    Two days ago was the first time I actually dressed up as a girl on a costume party amongst friends. They thought I'm gay for a while now because of some girly stuff I write out on facebook, but they would not confront me with it, instead they talk behind my back. It disturbs me since I never gave them any reason not to talk openly with me or about me. Anyway: I wore a skirt and panties, (the breasts I didn't like, I felt they are not a part of me / my body) and felt very freely, because they were in on the "pretend he's a woman" game, this was a day for everyone to pretend and a chance for me not to. I knew, that with the same appearance I would be stoned in the streets, I did not look like a woman at all, but with friends it was kind of nice to dress up like one. In the inside I felt like the little girl usually. I loved the skirt and the panties, I didn't mind at all people seeing me in them and I really enjoyed the attention I've got, because it made me feel good about myself. But since men don't attract me, it felt weird and awkward to receive some kind of flirts and touches from the guys. So I partly felt unprotected, fragile. I kind of know now how girls feel when they are looking for values in men but mostly get unwanted attention, something forceful and brute compared to the tenderness of dealing with a soulmate for example. It's nice to get experiences and I think you should consider yourself as someone with many great opportunities someone on a nice trip, and you're not about to arrive anywhere anytime soon, but where you will get finally is heavily based on how you can enjoy being in the progress.


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    ps.: I don't consider myself being in the closet, since I act very controversial but more and more girly and childish, and whenever somebody asks me about that, I just tell the truth. I don't need to yell it out to the world, I want to see it as something natural but I would feel bad if I would have to lie about my feelings or my behavior so if a question is directed to me, I answer it and otherwise I just try to be more and more myself.

  3. #3


    Dear MLPPebble
    Yes i do hear what you are saying and this is difficult to navigate through. Be thankful that times have change and a little more gender friendly. Speaking of the old days as i am 53 years old and have been slowly changing my appearance for the public. Yes i have worn a dress and used the mens washroom in public. Having to except the fact that at 6'2" and two hundred pounds i am limited at to what will work for me. Earrings are tasteful and picking out clothing that is not too flashy but very feminine. After being in the closet for so many years hoping the urge to feel like a Woman would fade away. This feeling never went away for me. Please do what makes you feel whole and enjoy your life. My experience is that now i am feeling whole and i am not trying to please the world anymore.
    Sincerely mypet

  4. #4


    Being someone who has not yet started hormones and is slightly passable/andro at best, I use the women's bathroom only because its what's appropriate ~ i feel like i am a woman and i dress like a woman, so it's only appropriate that I should use the women's bathroom. So far, every time i've used the women's bathroom, I've never so much as gotten a 2nd look ~ either other girls look once and make the distinction and then just go about their day, or they look up in passing and don't make a connection ~ but what i've noticed is that if you are dressed like a woman, behave like a woman and use the bathroom for its intended purpose, no one really cares. I remember one time (fully dressed) i walked into the mens bathroom out of fear (way back then when I was still starting out), and ALL the guys stared at me with a face of discomfort.... i was literally making them uncomfortable for using the men's bathroom.... This made me feel good in a way because it kind of shows the social distinction men and women have in terms of using the bathroom. Having said that, i've also been in unisex bathrooms that are primarily in gay clubs; or sometimes they have men and women's bathrooms but there is no strict rule of enforcement and everyone is allowed to use whichever bathroom they want.... At the end of the day ~ we all have to pee at some point, and most of the time people don't care unless they have proverbial stick up their ass about it.

    Having lived as male for 23 years and having lived as a woman entirely for almost 3 months, I can tell you right now that a dress is the most comfortable thing i've ever worn... not only because its freer and more breathable, but because it feels right, it feels nice, and to be honest with you I pity men for not being able to wear them out of social stigma because holy hell are they comfortable. And you would be surprised to know that almost ALL girls love dresses... there is simply nothing more comfortable than a dress... its an entire outfit in one, and it comes in many different styles, from casual to elegant. Having something between your legs really makes no difference unless you are wearing leggings, tight jeans or short shorts. But when you wear a skirt or a dress, there is really no need to fear ~ the idea that your dress will fly up is rare and according to physics, the wind would have to come below you, not behind or in front; sure there is a chance it will blow it to the side and might cause it to fly slightly up, but you can usually tell when this is going to happen and prevent it by simply holding it down. I think if it were ultimately a big issue, dresses and skirts wouldn't be as popular as they are. Women dont worry about these things usually because wearing a dress is about being liberated and free and saying "i dont care". Its about feeling sexy and feeling feminine. The kind of dress you wear says a lot about your mood, character, etc. (maybe thats just me) Women's clothes in general can fit men, its all about the sizing. You don't have to make your own, just make sure you buy the right size.

    At the end of the day you should always just do whatever you feel like doing and whatever you are comfortable doing because honestly; think of it this way ~ people are going to judge you REGARDLESS of how 'normal' you try to appear.... so if they're going to judge you, might as well give them something to talk about

    I personally use to be afraid of going out and because of the stares or jeers i might get... but I've noticed a surprising discovery:

    Its all about attitude. I leave my house, dressed up, with make up, looking pretty ~ and the majority of the time people will either ignore me or stare blankly, but never have i seen a laugh or a snicker or even a face of disgust, its always a face of "awe", and I dont know (and probably will never know) if its a look I get of "is that a dude?" or if its a "holy shit, that girl is tall" (I'm 6'1" and stand very sleak and tall, especially in dresses and heels). But I always retain my identity in my head; I am simply wearing what I want to wear, if anyone has a problem, they can speak their mind and i will respectfully not give a shit lol.

    Idk if this helps, but Iggy Pop wore a dress and they interviewed him and asked him why he was wearing a woman's dress, and he said "ah, i beg to differ, this is a man's dress", and then when they asked him if he felt strange or ashamed when wearing women's clothes, and he responded "I don't feel ashamed of wearing women's clothes because there is nothing shameful about being a woman." Do what makes you happy and wave your middle finger at the world, because the more proudly you do it, the more others will join in and wave with you ~_^ be the change you want to see in the world.

  5. #5


    I don't think you're in the closet. Like you say, you're just comfortable with who you are. Lots of straight men like the feel of wearing a skirt and many fashion designers have tried to push this movement but society is stubborn.

    And yes sometimes we have to worry about strong breezes, bending over the wrong way or sitting 'properly' in skirts and dresses. Other times you'll find one that looks good, fits good and feels good. That's when you walk a little taller and worry less about the cake you want for breakfast...or maybe that's just me.

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