I'm not a misogynist but I know I can come off as one sometimes. I have a lot to be angry about, but I'm trying to keep a lid on that.
How does a guy who survived a very abusive relationship with a very sick, sociopathic person learn to trust women again? She was a really horrible person and I know not everyone is an evil sociopathic computer hacker but every time I even think about trying to date I end up telling myself that what happened will repeat itself because the only woman I've been with in the last decade targeted me for my vulnerabilities (and forgive, I'm always afraid people will think I'm exaggerating about her, you have to trust me that there's no possible way of over-exaggerating the mental abuse she put me through).
I have female friends but I find myself redirecting my anger and mistrust toward them (and they don't deserve that, but when I'm manic and raging, I don't think clearly).
I really want to learn how to trust women instead of seeing them as an attractive but ever-elusive enemy who want nothing to do with me.
Self esteem. Yeah. I know. But I need evidence. I don't believe things on faith. How do I go about finding that evidence?