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Thread: Where did the term "little" come from?

  1. #1

    Default Where did the term "little" come from?

    Where did the term "little" come from in the kink community? I often see people in DD/lg argue that a little is exclusively a type of submissive in a D/s relationship which doesn't have to involve ageplay, and ageplayers/ABs argue that littles don't have to be submissives. DD/lg is becoming something of a fad on tumblr with young girls (my guess is due to Lana Del Rey's Lolita-esque aesthetic), and there's a backlash effort from people experienced in BDSM to educate newbies who call themselves a "little" that being a sub entails a lot more than coloring books and plushies, and that the "Daddies" that they're looking for are Dominants who are going to expect submission rather than being expected to fulfill a caretaker role. But it's confusing to me because I also see websites like LittlesMunch that have the ABDL flag displayed everywhere with no mention of BDSM, ageplay/ABDL websites (like this one) that use LG simply to denote a female-identifying AB, and in the context of being an ABDL, "Daddy/Mommy" does refer to a caretaker that's not necessarily a Dominant. So my question is, did the term "little" come from the BDSM community, the ABDL/ageplay community, or did both of these communities happen to come up with the same word to mean totally different things in different contexts?

  2. #2

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    I've never heard of it that way (DD/LG without ageplay aspect)...

    I'm thinking that the essence of "LG" is the same in both contexts (person identifying as younger and female & would like to be treated as such), but in the ABDL community the caretaking aspect is more stronger, while in BDSM it would be the D/s relationship.

    How do the people who use "little" that way distinguish it from "regular submissives"?

  3. #3

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    Quote Originally Posted by fondo View Post
    How do the people who use "little" that way distinguish it from "regular submissives"?
    These are some articles I often see recommended to newbies that discuss that:

    Littles vs Age-Players - A Little Understanding

    Daddy Doms and their little girls | Not so growed up... (this one has an especially negative attitude about ageplayers)

    http://notsogrowedup.wordpress.com/2...-are-a-little/

    There are also groups on fetlife for littles who don't ageplay. There seems to be a lot of conflicting information about this topic and as a newbie myself I find it hard to separate what information is legitimate from what is not. There seems to be an attitude that being an AB is just roleplay whereas being "little" is an all-the-time thing that's a part of your personality and doesn't involve regression. I'm not sure if this attitude is due to ignorance of ABs or if this is a mostly agreed upon distinction. Like, I'm not a sub, and I do regress when I'm feeling especially babyish, but I also feel like I am "little" all the time to the extent that it's appropriate to express publicly and I think this is also the case for many ABs/ageplayers?
    Last edited by cherieberry; 05-Jan-2014 at 00:31. Reason: clarification

  4. #4

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    I'm not sure, but I guess people with such interests have always been trying to find a label that describes how and why they feel "different" (to vanilla bods). I'm sure lots of people chucked all sorts of terms out there to describe themselves, but I remember a long time ago (probably in my early 20s) I came across the term "little" and thought it seemed like the perfect way to describe how I feel. Things like AB, DL, infantilist, etc. just made me cringe a bit... they just seemed a bit... blunt and direct... "little" sounds like the kind of word I could say in front of my grandmother without blushing! I guess it's increasing popularity is partly down to lots of other people also thinking it's a good way to describe themselves too and using it more often.

    I think every person is different in their... "kinkiness" and what they are emotionally and sensually trying to achieve from it... So, naturally, everyone will have a different idea of what a person playing a particular role should be like. Some people will assume a "little" must be extremely submissive; others are "littles" who are confident, precocious and far less submissive.

    A randy misogynist might want someone role-playing a nurse to behave in an overtly sexual way. An AB might want a nurse to be caring, sensitive and modest in behaviour. A BDSM-ist might want the nurse to be domineering, forceful and aggressive.

    I think the important thing is that it is up to YOU to decide what "little" means to you. Don't let anyone tell you how you "ought" to be just to please them. If someone lectures you on the fact that you are not being little "properly", then they just have a different idea of what "little" means. That's fine -- everyone has their own ideas, but you don't have to force your ideas to fit in with theirs.

    It's one thing for a "dominant role-player" to control the "submissive role-player" as part of a mutually consensual "game", but it is never okay for anyone to pressure you into playing a "game" that you don't want to play, or feeling that you have to behave in a certain way just to please them.

    Just some random thoughts... :-/

  5. #5

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    I think it came from the mingleing of bdsm comunity and ageplayers its changed what you call dd and lg are now more commenly just called daddy baby girl ddlg is often ageplay mixed in as extra im both In serveral of my relationship and you can have daddys and babyboys to

    The barriers are not so sollid or clear as ageplay

    Or not (sorry im new to using this site and my tablate)
    Last edited by HogansHeroes; 05-Jan-2014 at 03:39. Reason: merging posts

  6. #6

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    Quote Originally Posted by cherieberry View Post
    and there's a backlash effort from people experienced in BDSM to educate newbies who call themselves a "little" that being a sub entails a lot more than coloring books and plushies, and that the "Daddies" that they're looking for are Dominants who are going to expect submission rather than being expected to fulfill a caretaker role.
    To be perfectly honest, people who tell other people how to be kinky can screw right off in my opinion. Maybe the person saying that would expect submission, but it doesn't mean that everyone would. These kinds of things, like all inter-personal relationships, should be negotiated between the people actually involved in the relationship. If someone identifies as a lg and is in search of a Daddy, meets one, and finds that their interests don't mash up, then they can keep looking until they find someone whose interests *do*. They don't have to force themselves to fit someone else's mold. (Nor, for the record, should the potential Daddy force himself to fit into the mold of what the lg is looking for, either. Relationships are about meeting the needs and desires of all parties, not one party getting what they want and screw the other one.)

    Sorry, I know I'm coming off a little harsh there, but I really do have strong opinions about this. It comes across like the person is saying, "How dare you like plushies and not be interested in sex, sex is owed to your caretaker in return for putting up with you." There aren't enough "nope"s in the entire world for that kind of attitude and simply communicating with your partner and being upfront about what you both want and are willing to do (and do not want to do) eliminates the need for it entirely.

  7. #7

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    Totally agree, KatieBear. That mentality is in the same mold as a hardcore suspension fetishist saying "Ewww, you're into pooping in diapers? That's disgusting." I find the idea of poking giant holes in my skin and hanging myself from them to be *really* disgusting.

    It's OK to be squicked out and to hit personal limits, or to have preferences for your kinks - we all do. It's not OK to assert that your kink is "better" or "superior," or that your idea of a kink is the only idea of that kink.

  8. #8

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    To answer the title's question the word "little" comes from the Dutch word "luttel" which led directly to the Old High German "luzzil", to the Old Norse "litill", to the Old English "lytel" which is pronounced identically to the modern-day version.

    In conclusion: an educational joke! Yay!

  9. #9

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    This probably isn't a help, but my wife prefers to call me her "little guy" when I'm diapered, rather than think of me as a baby. I think she needs to have me still be in control as an adult, even if that adult part is being put in a back corner of my brain, at least for the moment.

    I too agree KatieBear. We've even done it as members on this site, and we need to remember that as a group, we can experience enjoying or wearing diapers differently from one another, and that's okay. I'm amused when someone is really repulsed by another kind of fetish, or at the very least, don't understand it and therefore reject it. I've done it, at least mentally, but I remind myself that my infantilism is weird, and I know that non fetishists should not be expected to understand it. I'm actually okay with that. We're all human, after all.

  10. #10

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    Quote Originally Posted by KatieBear View Post
    Sorry, I know I'm coming off a little harsh there, but I really do have strong opinions about this. It comes across like the person is saying, "How dare you like plushies and not be interested in sex, sex is owed to your caretaker in return for putting up with you." There aren't enough "nope"s in the entire world for that kind of attitude and simply communicating with your partner and being upfront about what you both want and are willing to do (and do not want to do) eliminates the need for it entirely.
    Don't worry, I don't think you're being too harsh. Like I said I'm just confused about this because I don't yet have enough knowledge about this topic to be able to discern when someone is just espousing a personal opinion and disguising it as a fact, and when someone is trying to explain something that's actually mostly agreed upon by the majority. I'm glad that it seems that what being "little" entails is more subjective than how most people I see debating it are making it out to be. It's hard not to feel self-doubt when someone is telling you you're doing it all wrong! D:

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