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Thread: Gf and ghost

  1. #1

    Default Gf and ghost

    hey everyone so my gf is a big believer in ghost she has claimed to see and feel ghost im not a believer in ghost in the least bit and when something happening with "ghost" she gets messed up and i cant stand it cause mr. good bf here but honestly i cant stand talking about it with her. so is there a way to handle this i told her im not believer.

  2. #2

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    Well,

    The biggest thing is to convey you are interested, but don't believe in ghosts...

    The even bigger thing is too understand there are things that are in explained by science and conventional knowledge...

    Not necessarily ghosts...although that is and can be a large spectrum where unknown things are lumped into as well...

    Myself I was never a ghost believer, and still laugh at horror films...

    But, I've got an appreciation for odd or unexplained things...

    I've had a few experiences with unexplained happenings and do know we aren't as all knowing as we think we are...

    So, keep an open mind...

  3. #3

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    Quote Originally Posted by philly View Post
    hey everyone so my gf is a big believer in ghost she has claimed to see and feel ghost im not a believer in ghost in the least bit and when something happening with "ghost" she gets messed up and i cant stand it cause mr. good bf here but honestly i cant stand talking about it with her. so is there a way to handle this i told her im not believer.
    Honestly, philly, it sounds to me as if you would like someone here to tell you how that it is perfectly OK for you to act and feel this way, and that "Mr. Good BF" should still feel good about himself even though he is seeking a way to blow off his girlfriend when she needs to talk about a supernatural occurrence she sincerely believes she is witnessing, one that--by your own statement--gets her "messed up." Sorry. No can do. A truly good boyfriend puts aside his personal beliefs here. What difference does it make whether you believe in ghosts? She does. And what she is experiencing is hurting her. She needs you there to talk to, to help her through whatever she is dealing with, and instead you come here--to a group of internet strangers--and ask how to get out of that commitment? The best way to "handle" this, philly, is to assume some responsibility. If you are her boyfriend, be there for her. If you "can't stand" being there, then let her go so she can find a better man who can be.

    Sorry if that sounds harsh, but the truth is that you need to remember that being a "good bf" is not just about kissing or buying occasional flowers. It's about giving of yourself when your girlfriend needs you to, even if you "can't stand" it. That is what maturity is. And it is what every girlfriend (and every boyfriend) deserves in a relationship.

  4. #4

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    Quote Originally Posted by philly View Post
    hey everyone so my gf is a big believer in ghost she has claimed to see and feel ghost im not a believer in ghost in the least bit and when something happening with "ghost" she gets messed up and i cant stand it cause mr. good bf here but honestly i cant stand talking about it with her. so is there a way to handle this i told her im not believer.
    It has taken me a very long time to come up with a coherent answer to this thread. A lot of what I have to say is along the same line as ICkaraokegirl.

    I have address my precognitive or premonition abilities be for and have gotten some "interesting" responses. What your gf needs is understanding and no judgement. Actually think of it in the terms of how would you feel if your gf did not give you understanding or no judgement about the us of diapers.

    I can easily understand how she "feels" after having an "encounter". It is not that she is "messed up", but that she is more confused and struggling to understand what has happened. I can not comment much farther about the experience that she has without talking to her directly. But I can relate my experience and what I feel.

    The last vision that I had I saw a very disturbing scene from 2022. I attempted to talk to several people about the vision and all I got was the stink eye, cold shoulder, and the feeling like I was some kind of "Nut". The facts are that this ability runs on my mothers side of the family and I goes back several generations. Whether the events is what will happen or what could happen I do not know. After the vision I felt so alone and scared. I have this piece of information and I do not know who to talk to or how. The people that I attempted to explain it to were of no support. I was not wanting any praise or "metal" for saving the world. I just needed someone to listen and help me work through the situation and feel relieved of the burden of the information. I finally was able to talk to a relative with access to Military Intelligence and was told that they get info like this all the time and that it will be documented and taken under consideration. I know it was government terminology for get lost, but it was the help/relief I needed.

    So there is no good or bad boyfriend mood here. It is simply being a good friend that listens to someone that needs to hear what they are saying out load in-order to clear there own mind. Whether you believe or not is not the issue. You are her BF and you need to give her the support that she needs in a difficult situation. Until one with this kind of gift get the help one needs to control the gift it is very unnerving and down right scary.

    This also brings me back to why we are here in the first place. If it was not for the internet and my finding the correct search word of infantilism I would not have found ADISC and been able to get my understanding, acceptance and control over the binge and purge cycles that plagued me since I was a small boy.

    So even if you do not believe in parapsychology, helping your gf find out more about her gift and how to control it is more to the point of being a good BF.

  5. #5

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    Phily,

    Myself I am an absolute NON-Believer in ANYTHING so called "Paranormal".
    I am much more inclined to go with logic, logic explanations and science.
    And Just because *I* can not explain something I would never jump to a conclusion like "ghosts" "god(s)" "demons" (etc...).
    If I find something I can not explain or don't understand - I try to figure it out.
    Personally I have always struggled to understand why people often immediately jump to "paranormal", "religious", etc explanations, when a much more logical one can usually be found with a bit "work".


    Years ago there was this university professor (if you want I can go and dig up his name) who did experiments with "haunted" places and rooms.
    One thing he found out was a specific range of very low - barely audible - frequencies (often generated by air-vents and other absolutely NOT-Paranormal stuff).
    Now those frequencies are too low to "hear" but none the less your body is able to pick them up (low key vibration)... and added to this, they can make your eyes "vibrate" slightly - causing you to actually see stuff. (shift in 3D perspective) Stuff like "shadows", "ghosts"...
    He did this experiments in a CLASSROOM with an ultra-low frequency generator... people saw ghosts, felt cold, felt "shivers down the spine", basically creeped out.
    ... so a simple physical phenomenon, caused people to freak out in a certainly non-haunted classroom.

    Now to your "issues" with the GF...

    First I think the important part is, your GF is an individual person with her own believes... only because you don't like a specific aspect, it will not go away.
    So it's important to accept that she does believe in the paranormal.... and probably it's not going to change really soon.
    What to do?
    - Be a good listener and be there for her... I guess it's difficult for her to have what she believes to have (being psychic / empathic)... it doesn't matter if it's "real" - she believes and it's important to her
    - Try to TALK - explain your view and have her explain what she sees / feels... debate - but do not try to "Push" her in any direction.
    - Try to deliver alternative logic explanations, scientific views, etc... Basically you can softly and carefully try to deconstruct what she perceives to have been a ghost sighting or whatever.
    - Last but not least, accept that this is her believe - if she doesn't want to change it or debate the validity of such sightings - it is her "right" to keep at it.
    I am in a long term relationship (12 years so far) - and trust me, we don't share every opinion , we certainly don't have quite similar believes (I'm 1000% non religious, she's mildly religious, I don't believe in an after life, spirits etc, she does believe into some of it, just to name a few differences)... but hey, we're all different to some degree, and we need to accept our partners the way they are... and having your GF/Partner talk about what is important to them never should be bad.

  6. #6

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    I'm a believer and yes have had stuff happen .
    You may have not but some of us are sentive she may be one.
    I for one feel them witch I do.
    There are thing you like thats not her thing but you like to talk about so it's a two way street .
    Keep that in mind :-)

  7. #7

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    thank you everyone i agree with what ICkaraokegirl it was one of those i posted when i was frustrated i guess is a way of putting it but i dont normally post these and i suppose i needed a kick in the pants i mean when i look back on the post i feel like a (insert bad word here).also im i think im pretty good bf but it was a stressful day so this also a way all of you are family so agian think you for the kick in the pants i needed it

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