From what I can tell most AB's are born AB's. I don't know if this is true or not. I wasn't born this way, I chose to be an AB/DL and for some reason I don't feel good about it. I guess I am jealous that people have had these urges for as long as they can remember. I don't know why I feel bad about it, maybe I don't feel like a genuine AB. I also have trouble regressing and I think some of it is because I wasn't made this way. I struggle with the desire to have been created an AB and to have had these urges but I wasn't.
Do you guys think you were born an AB like I have said or was it a choice? And I really could use some support from you y'all since I feel bad about it. I struggle with this a lot. Thanks
For some background information this is how it all came about. I hope you don't judge, and I'm not the only member of ADISC who got into ABDLism this way. I also apologize for bringing up MDMA use since it is unhelathy, but this is in my past.
Back in '08 and '09 my best friend, his girlfriend, and I would go clubbing and use MDMA. MDMA is the chemical name for ecstasy. I am no longer involved in this culture but I was for a few years. I had a pacifier for the teeth clenching associated with its use but I also found that the paci helped with the comedown and the depression that was a part of it. I loved the feeling of the paci in my mouth and the guard against my lips even though I tended to bite down on it (it was just a baby paci not a Nuk 5). I was going through some stuff at the time and not making the best decisions obviously and the use of the drug also caused some long term depression for the two years that I used the MDMA. My best friend's girlfriend had a baby blankie and I wanted a blankie too, so I had my Mother make me one for Christmas. I found that the paci and blankie really helped during this time in my life. Then one night I was with a different friend and we got drunk. I passed out on his couch and had an accident. We joked about it in the morning and out of curiosity and just being silly we went and bought some Depends. I wore them and got a sexual thrill from it. I had heard of AB's and DL's and then eventually I was self soothing with my Paci, blankie, a diaper, and then a bottle. Eventually I got a plushie. At first this was all just a sexual fetish but after time I got a lot of comfort out of it even though I have never really successfully regressed.
So in the end I just chose to wear diapers, I never had urges as a kid nor did I have the desire to be a baby as a kid. I just feel different and I don't feel like a genuine AB. I think if I was "genuine" or born this way that I would have better luck regressing in the first place.